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Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz

After not seeing a movie for almost three weeks, the Two Jews On Film are back and once again, we are disagreeing.
Our first film, since leaving the beach for the moutains, is 'Oblivion' directed by Joseph Kosinski based on his unpublished graphic novel.
The year is 2077 and life on Earth is non-existent. Sixty years ago, some really nasty aliens known as the Scavengers destroyed our moon and you know what that means...No moon...no water...No water...no food. Not a good thing at all.
We retaliated by nuking them which of course made Earth uninhabitable. Not a smart move.
Anyway, the remaining humans were taken to Titan, one of Saturn's moons where they now live supposedly happily ever after.
When we meet Harper and his partner/lover, Vika (Andrea Riseborough) they are two weeks away from completing a five year assignment on Earth. They reside in a very chic tower thousands of feet above the ravished planet.
When they are not making hot, steamy love, Harper flies around the scorced earth in a hi tech helicopter, hunting down any remaining Scavengers, while Vika directs him from home, with the help of a Titan Commander, Sally (Melissa Leo) who's southern drawl makes taking order a pleasure. Viki and Jack are a very 'effective team'
However, Vika can't wait for their assignment to be over. Jack not so much.
Despite having his memory wiped, he's having flashbacks and dreams of a previous life, circa the early 21st century...He keeps seeing himself, with a dark haired beauty, on top of the Empire State Building and the two of them are obviously...not in a platonic relationship.
Now, Jack isn't just a hunky killing machine. He has a thing for nostalgia...Wears a Yankees cap, likes to read poetry and listen to old phonograph records...'He also has a crash pad nestled in the woods surrounded by trees and lakes... Seems Earth still has some life in her.
If I say anymore about 'Oblivion' I'll be headed into Spoiler turf. But I will let you know that Morgan Freeman and the beautiful Olga Kurylenko are a very important part of the surprises that await Harper.
I found 'Oblivion' written by Kosinski with help from William Monahan, Michael Arndt and Karl Gajdusek to be an exciting, thoughtful and engrossing sci fi thriller. For that reason I gave it 4 out of 5 bagels.
'Oblivion' which opens in theatres, Friday April 19, 2013, could have used some editing, but still if you're a sci fi buff, I think you will really enjoy it.
Check out our video for more of our thoughts and for John's bagel rating.

6.12.13 at 7:30 pm | Superman/Clark Kent/Kal-El (Henry Cavill) is a. . .

6.6.13 at 1:13 pm |

5.30.13 at 9:57 pm | Every son, whether conscious or unconscious,. . .

5.22.13 at 7:43 pm |

5.22.13 at 9:25 am |

5.13.13 at 8:06 pm |

6.12.13 at 7:30 pm | Superman/Clark Kent/Kal-El (Henry Cavill) is a. . . (223)

5.22.13 at 7:43 pm | (12)

6.6.13 at 1:13 pm | (6)
March 19, 2013 | 5:45 pm
Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz
As I was watching this film, I kept thinking about 'Die Hard'.
Even though 'Die Hard' was set in a hotel and 'Olympus Has Fallen' is set in the White House, the two films have a great deal in common...Terrorists take hostages...They make outrageous demands and only one man can stop them.
In the former, we have Bruce Willis as our hero...the man who can do what no other human on earth can do...In 'Olympus Has Fallen' directed by Antoine Fuqua ('Training Day') we have Gerard Butler or Bruce Willis light.
Of course that's just my opinion...I just don't find Butler's acting all that interesting...Although he was fun to watch in the film '300' but I think that had more to do with his body than his acting ability.
In 'Olympus Has Fallen' Butler plays Mike Banning, a former presidential Secret Service agent. Mike had guarded the President and his son until an incident made him persona non gratia at the White House.
He now has a boring job at the Treasury Department and longs to return to the Presidential detail. He's about to get his wish.
A group of Northern Korean extremists, led by super evil, Kang (Rick Hune) takes over the White House aka Olympus and captures President Benjamin Asher (Aaron Eckhart) and his staff.
As an intense battle rages on the White House lawn, Banning must find his way into the besieged building to rescue the President, save Asher's young son...and stop these crazy Koreans from causing WW3.
Sounds like a fun ride huh? Yes and no...On the plus side, the premise is very interesting and makes you think...Is it possible for a small group of terriorists to take over the White House? According to director Fuqua, it is.
The film is very well researched and the replica of the White House is perfect...
Unfortunately after awhile, the film becomes one big shooting fest...Bodies start piling up, while Speaker of the House, now Acting President, Allan Trumball (Morgan Freeman), Secret Service Director Lynne Jacobs (Angela Bassett) and General Edward Clegg (Robert Forster) sit around yelling at each other, trying to decide what to do about this little problem.
But they need not worry, because super hero extraordinaire, is about to do what hundreds of police, military, air force pilots, could not do...TAKE THESE BAD GUYS DOWN.
And that's the story folks...Familiar? Definitely...Exciting? Some of the time...Predicitable...100 percent.
The supporting cast including Melissa Leo as Defense Secretary Ruth McMillan is fine, and she can really take a punch.
Ashley Judd makes a brief appearance as the President's wife, Radha Mitchell is Butler's better half, Cole Hauser and Dylan McDermott are SS agents.
I gave 'Olympus Has Fallen' which opens Friday, March 22nd, 2012 a very generous 3 bagels out of 5. John wasn't as generous.
Check out our video for more of our thoughts and let us know what you think.
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Thanks everyone.
March 14, 2013 | 10:47 am
Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz

I love magic. When I watch a good magician, I feel the wonderment of a five year old.
Too bad I didn't feel that way while watching 'The Incredible Burt Wonderstone', directed by Don Scardino and written by Jonathan Goldstein and John Francis Daley ('Horrible Bosses').
Unfortunately, the story is one you've seen many times before...Superstar is an egomaniac. Treats everyone like dirt. Then overnight, he loses everything...His best friend/partner, his money, his career and hits bottom. It's here that he develops humility and learns what's really important in life.
The superstar in this movie is Burt Wonderstone (Steve Carell) magician/performer extraordinaire. His magic partner is his childhood BFF, Anton Marvelton (Steve Buscemi). The pair have been headliners at Bally's Las Vegas for the last ten years...But the casino owner, Doug Munny (James Gandolfini) thinks their act has grown stale and wants them to come up with something new.
That's not their only problem. There's a new magician in town and he's getting a great deal of attention. His name is Steve Gray aka The Brain Rapist (Jim Carrey). Gray has a successful cable show and his in your face, gritty, violent, physical feats appeals to the younger crowd.
Carrey, by the way, is the best thing in the film.
When Wonderstone and Marvelton perform a stunt to prove they still have what it takes to be Number 1, it goes horribly wrong and it's the beginning of the end for Burt.
First, Marvelton, tired of being abused by Wonderstone, leaves the act. Burt tries to make it on his own, but fails miserably.
Not only does Wonderstone gets fired but he discovers that he's broke. Yep our guy has hit bottom and now, he has no choice but to start over.
Lucky for Burt, he has Alan Arkin on his side. Arkin plays Rance Holloway, a quintessential 1960's magician, who's is the reason Wonderstone fell in love with magic as a young boy.
Oh, and I musn't forget the girl....There's always a girl and in this movie, her name is Jane (Oliva Wilde) and she's Wonderstone's assistant/love interest/ aspiring magician.
To be fair, I did laugh, but not enough for me to say this is a 'must-see' comedy... Although the ending is quite clever and good for several loud chuckles.
As for Steve Carell, I found his performance too much of a charicature...I did enjoy Buscemi and Alan Arkin a lot as well as Jay Mohr as Rick the Implausible.
I gave 'The Incredible Burt Wonderstone', which opens Friday March 15, 2012, 2 1/2 bagels out of 5. Check out our video for John's magic trick and his bagel rating.
Please SUBSCRIBE to our youtube channel and LIKE us on our Two Jews On Film facebook page. Thanks everyone...and let us know what you think.
March 7, 2013 | 4:43 pm
Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz
'We're off to see the Wizard...The Wonderful Wizard Of Oz'...except...
In Sam Raimi's 'Oz The Great And Powerful' he's not exactly wonderful or a wizard.
In fact, he' Oscar Diggs (James Franco) a 3rd rate circus magician/con artist, who escapes from Kansas in a hot air balloon, only to land in the beautiful, magical Land of Oz.
There, Oscar meets the beautiful witch Theodora (Mila Kunis) and her older sister, Evanora, (Rachel Weisz) who rules over the Emerald City.
When the sisters mistake Oscar for the wizard, who the prophecies foretold, would one day come and save Oz, he thinks he's struck gold.
Well actually he has. Seems Oz is filled with gold...a lot of gold, enough to make Oscar a billionaire several times over.
Of course nothing is simple for our con man...It doesn't take long for the sisters to become suspicious of him.
Now, in order to to claim the riches of Oz, Oscar must figure out how to save the inhabitants from the dark forces waiting to take hold of them and their beloved city.
Lucky for him, Oscar has the help of Glinda, aka The Good Witch (Michelle Williams) who winds up showing him just what kind of man he really is.
'Oz The Great And Powerful' written by Mitchell Kapner,and David Lindsay-Abaire, imagines the origins of the beloved wizard character first brought to life in author L. Frank Baum's book 'The Wonderful Wizard Of Oz.
Shot in 3d, the film also introduces new characters as well, including...an adorable porcelain child called China Girl (voice by Joey King) and Finley (voice by Zach Braf ) a winged monkey who accompanies Oscar on his journey through Oz; serving as his sounding board and conscience.
I really enjoyed 'Oz The Great And Powerful' which opens in theatres Friday March 8, 2012 and for that reason gave it 4 bagels out of 5. I thought it was fun and a wonderful family picture.
Check out our video to for John's thoughts and his bagel score. Also love to know whom you agree with.
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February 27, 2013 | 8:06 pm
Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz

For those of you, who managed to get through childhood, without hearing the story of Jack, a farm boy, who sold his horse for some magical beans, don't worry...director Bryan Singer has recreated the story, with some added touches, in his new 3D IMAX film, entitled 'Jack the Giant Slayer'.
Once upon a time, a race of giants were exiled from the earth to a land far, far, in fact, really far away, known as Gantua. Seems these big guys were more into ravishing the earth, instead of living peacefully with us humans.
Anyway it's been over a thousand years since man and giants occupied the same space, but soon, that's about to change when...
Jack (Nicholas Hoult) a farmboy unwittingly opens a gateway between our world and the giants, when a monk gives him some magical beans, in exchange for his horse.
The one instruction the monk gives Jack is...'Do not let the beans get wet'.
So guess what happens next? Yep, one of the beans winds up in a pool of water and before you can say 'a tree grows in Brooklyn,' a beanstalk shoots up...and up...and up...leading straight to the Giants' homeland.
Of course there's more. What would a fairy tale be without a Princess in distress?
In this case, the Princess is Isabelle (Eleanor Tomlinson) who's being forced to marry her King Daddy's (the always excellent Ian McShane) right hand man, Roderick (the ever so sleazy, Stanley Tucci).
No matter how hard Isabelle tries to convince her father that Sir R isn't her soul mate, the King won't budge.He thinks Roderick is a prince among men and the best match for his daughter.
Boy is King Daddy in for a surprise. But not just yet.
Seems the Princess, when the Princess isn't arguing with her father about her impending nuptials, likes to sneak out of the Palace and walk among the masses.
Well, one dark and stormy knight, during one of these outings, Isabelle gets lost, comes upon Jack's farm and before she knows what hits her, she gets swooped up by the beanstalk and winds up in Gantua, aka home of the big guys.
Lucky for Isabelle, she has a band of soldiers, led by Ewan McGregor, as well as Jack (who by now has a mad crush on her) willing to climb the outrageously tall beanstalk and come to her rescue.
'Jack The Giant Slayer' written by Christopher McQuarrie ('The Usual Suspects') Dan Studney and Darren Lemke ('Shrek Forever After') is a great film for the whole family. And that's exactly what it is...a family film.
It's basically a straight ahead story...Giants want to eat humans and take over the Earth. There are no female giants, so parents don't have to worry about sex and the violence is the usual type you find in cartoons.
There's also a good amount of humor and the two young leads are charming.
Bill Nighy as General Fallon, the ferocious two-headed leader of the Giant army, is alone worth the price of admission.
I gave 'Jack The Giant Slayer' which opens in theatres Friday March 1st, four bagels out of five. Check out our video to see what John thought and for more of our witty banter.
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Thanks everyone
February 21, 2013 | 6:41 pm
Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz

'Snitch' directed by Ric Roman Waugh is an action film with barely any 'action'. At that's the least of its problems.
February 13, 2013 | 7:21 pm
Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz
A Good Day to Die Hard (2013)Bruce Willis reprises his ioconic role as police detective John McClane in 'A Good Day To Die Hard' directed by John Moore ('Max Payne') and written by Skip Woods ('A Team') and Jason Keller.
McClane this time around, finds himself in Moscow. Seems his estranged son, Jack (Jai Courtney) has been arrested for murder. McClane isn't at all surprise. He believes Jack is a total screw-up.
In truth (and this isn't a SPOILER) Jack is a CIA operative trying to protect a government whistleblower, Komarov (Sebastian Koch) from being killed.
Anyway, before father and son can hook up, they're involved in an over the top car case through the streets of Moscow that lasts around ten minutes (It felt like ten hours)
After that's over, the two men, spend some time yelling at each other, followed by a few moments of male bonding, as they try to protect Komarov Russian bad guys. And there's lots of bad guys.
There's also lots of shoot outs, vicious fights, a little torture and more car chases.
Get the picture...
I really wanted to love this film or at least be entertained, but unfortunately neither one of those things happened.
'A Good Day To Die Hard' has what you'd expect from an action film...It has action. What it doesn't have, is a good script and well defined characters.
Bruce Willis is always fun to watch, but even he couldn't save this film from being nothing more than two hours of non stop, excessive violence, with a twist you could see coming a mile away.
It's for those reasons I gave 'A Good Day To Die Hard' 21/2 bagels out of 5.
The film opens on Valentines Day, Thursday February 14, 2012. If you're planning on having a romantic evening, this is definitely NOT the movie to see.
Check out our video to find out John's score and for more of our witty banter.
Please SUBSCRIBE to us on youtube and LIKE us on our Two Jews On Film facebook page.
Let us know what you think of 'A Good Day To Die Hard'. Thanks everyone.
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