January 29, 2013 | 5:08 pm

Review: ‘Stand Up Guys’

Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz

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There are many reasons to see this quirky, independent, funny, touching, action, comedy...but the main ones are...Al Pacino and Christopher Walken.  They are fantastic. Both of these fine actors give tour de force performances in their respective roles.

Al is Vall, a 60+ year old career criminal who's just been released from prison after serving twenty-eight years, for refusing to give up one of his close criminal associates.

His BFF, Doc (Christopher Walken) picks him up at the prison and the two guys spend the next few hours, talking about their glory days, drinking, popping pills and visiting a whore house.

But that's not all.  They wind up breaking out their old pal, Hirsch (Alan Arkin).from a nursing home.  From there things get even wilder. They guys steal a car and prove that despite their age, their capacity for mayhem is still very much alive and well.

It doesn't take long before bullets start to fly, as the men make a hilariously valiant effort, to compensate for the decades of crime, drugs and sex, they've missed.

But it's not all fun and games.  One of these old friends is keeping a dangerous secret.  Not to spoil anything, let's just say it has to do with a very powerful, very angry, mob boss bent on revenge.

"Stand Up Guys' which opens in theatres February 1, 2013 directed by Fisher Stevens and written by first time screenwriter, Noah Haidle is a must see for anyone who loves great acting, great dialogue and a great story.

I absolutely loved this film and gave it 41/2 bagels out of 5. Check out our video to see John's score and for our usual off the wall banter.

 

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Thanks everyone...And let us know what you think about 'Stand Up Guys'.

January 24, 2013 | 6:03 pm

Review: ‘Parker’

Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz

Parker (Jason Statham) is a thief...One of the best around.  But he's not just a thief.  He's a thief with a code...Do what you say...If you don't...there will be consequences.

 

 

Parker demands absolute loyalty and strict adherence to the plan from his crew.  Unfortunately that's not what he gets from fellow thieves, Melander (Michael Chiklis), Carlson (Wendell Pierce)  and Ross (Clifton Collins, Jr.)

'Parker' directed by Academy Award nomineeTaylor Hackford, ('Ray') starts out with a daring robbery at the Ohio State Fair that doesn't go so well.  Thanks to the recklessness of one of his men, someone dies.

This leads Parker very pissed off at his crew and declines their invitation to do another job. He just wants his share of the take and to be rid of them. 

His gang however, has another idea. They want to pool all the money and invest it in a major jewel heist.

So when Parker refuses to give up his share, they shoot him and leave him for dead on the side of a deserted road. Lucky for Parker, a very nice couple comes along and saves his life.

Well if they didn't, there would be a movie right?

Even though Parker isn't fully recovered, he wants one thing and one thing only...Revenge.

No one can stop him...Not even his girlfriend, Claire (Emma Booth) or her father and Parker's partner, Hurley (Nick Nolte),

He traces the gang to glitzy Palm Beach where he finds out, they are planning to rob $50 million dollars of jewels.

Needling to discover where the gang is hiding out, Parker poses as a wealthy Texan looking to buy a home.

And guess who's his real estate agent?  It's Miss J Lo, who winds up being extremely helpful to Parker, thanks to her extensive knowledge of Palm Beach..

You can imagine what happens next.  Afterall this is a Jason Statham movie.  That's right...lots of violence, fighting, and of course...lots and lots of...death.

'Parker' was written by John J. McLaughlin ('Black Swan' and 'Hitchcock') based on the novel, 'Flashfire' by Richard Stark aka Donald Westlake. 

It's basically mindless entertainment.  There aren't any surprises and the film gives you two hours of escapist fun...Personally I'd wait to see it on Netflix.

I gave 'Parker' 21/2 bagels out of 5. The film opens Friday January 25, 2012. 

Check out our video to find out John's score and hear more of our banter.

 

 

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January 16, 2013 | 8:03 pm

Review: ‘The Broken City’

Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz

The broken city, in this character driven crime thriller is...New York, aka Manhattan, aka The Big Apple.

In this fictitous New York City, The not so honorable, Nicolas Hostetler (Russell Crowe) is the Mayor...He's as charming as he is...corrupt.

When the film opens, we see cop, Billy Taggart (Mark Wahlberg) kill a rapist. According to Taggart, he shot him in self defense.

The public is outraged when the court decides that there's not enough evidence against Taggart to bring him to trial. But even though he beats the murder charge, Mayor Hostetler, has no choice but to ask for the policeman's resignation.

Fast forward to seven years later.

Taggart is barely getting by as a private investigator, mainly because he never asks his clients for money upfront and then they his refuse to pay him.  Wonder why!

But even though the dude is broke, he does have a very beautiful girlfriend, Natalie (Natalie Martinez) who just happens to be an aspiring actress.  The couple are so in love and in lust, they don't even mind living in a broken down apartment.

So life isn't too bad for Taggart.  That is until...

The Mayor, after not seeing the cop for years, calls Taggart out of the blue and hires him to follow his beautiful wife, Cathleen (Catherine Zeta-Jones) The Mayor, supposedly, thinks she's having an affair. 

Sounds like a fun movie? Unfortunately, not that much.

 The film directed by Allen Hughes, one half of The Hughes Brothers ('Menace 2 Society;) is something you've seen over and over again.  The story and the characters are very familiar and not in an exciting way.

Having said that...There are a couple of interesting twists in the film.

One involves, Councilman Jack Valenti (Barry Pepper) as the newcomer, who's running against the Mayor in the upcoming election and the other has to do with the Police Comissioner (Jeffrey Wright) who seems to dislike everybody.

As far as the acting goes, Russell Crowe is quite good.  Zeta-Jones and Wahlberg do what they always do.  She looks beautiful and he's Mister Tough, Vulnerable Guy.

So if you're curious, wait to see it when it comes to Netflix or cable.

John and I are actually in agreement.  We gave 'Broken City' which opens in theatres, Friday January 18, 2012, a low  2 bagels out of 5 score.

Check out our video for more of our silly banter.

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Thanks everyone.

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January 10, 2013 | 12:41 pm

Review: ‘Gangster Squad’

Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz

The year ... 1949... The place ... Los Angeles... and ruthless, sadistic, meglomaniac, Jewish gangster, Mickey Cohen (the brilliant Sean Penn), runs the show in this town.

We're talking drugs, guns, prostitutes, and (if he had his way) every wire bet placed west of Chicago would fall under his domain.

The guy is ruthless and a total nut job, completely lacking in charm. He's definitely no Michael Correleone.

To get an idea how Cohen's mind works, at some point in the film he yells to his crew of killers, ''You heard of Manifest Destiny? That's when you take what you can, when you can ... And I'm gonna take it all and not just because I can, but because this is my destiny...Los Angeles is my destiny."

Cohen is a thug. He doesn't even know which fork to use for the salad. And the guy likes to eat out a lot. So what does he do? Cohen hires an etiquette coach (Emma Stone). Of course, she also becomes his unfortunate lover.

So how do you stop a monster who has practically every politician, cop and judge in his pocket?

Luckily, Chief Of Police Parker (Nick Nolte) has come up with a plan. He recruits ex-war hero and LAPD Sgt. John O'Mara (Josh Brolin) to put together a secret squad to bring Cohen down. 

It doesn't take long for O'Mara to assemble the best of the best: Sgt. Jerry Wooters (Ryan Gosling) who just happens to be in love with Cohen's girl, electronics wiz Conwell Keeler (Giovanni Ribisi), sharp shooter Max Kennard (Robert Patrick), his side-kick Navidad Ramirez (Michael Pena) and Officer Coleman Harris (Anthony Mackie) who patrols the streets of South Central.

O'Mara's motto: "We're not solving a case here. We're going to war. And it's guerilla style war. Their unofficial name is ...'The Gangster Squad.'"

"Gangster Squad" is directed by Ruben Fleischer ("Zombieland") and written by Will Beal. It is based on the book Gangster Squad by Paul Lieberman and it has all the ingredients you'd expect in this kind of film.

Over the top violence, fully developed characters, a bit of humor, buddy relationships and, of course, a few love stories.

As for the production itself, production designer Maher Ahmad along with editors Alan Baumgarten and James Herbert, as well as, Academy Award winning costume designer Mary Zophres have done a brilliant job in recreating the Los Angeles of 1949.

From the sets to the elegant night clubs to the art deco buildings and the fabulous cars (why don't automobiles look like that anymore?) everything is authentic and transports us to the glamorous Golden Age of 1949.

"Gangster Squad" gives us a glimpse into Los Angeles when it was still the wild wild west and Burbank was just over the river.

The supporting cast, including Mireille Enos ("The Killing") as Connie O'Mara, John's pregnant and super understanding wife, is excellent.

I really enjoyed this film and gave "Gangster Squad" four bagels out of five. 

Check out our video for John's score and for more of our silly banter.

"Gangster Squad" opens in theatres on Jan. 11, 2013.

Please SUBSCRIBE to us on youtube and LIKE us on our Two Jews On Film facebook page. Thanks everyone.

Let us know what you think about this film.

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January 6, 2013 | 9:40 pm

Two Jews On Film Picks Their Top Ten Films Of 2012

Posted by Joan Alperin-Schwartz

2012 was a great year for films...Studio films as well as indies all scored big.

From the exquisite writing, directing, special effects, I found myself laughing hysterically from a foul mouth, oversex, pot smoking bear, to a bunch of folks freaking out at the prospect of turning 40.

We had cutting edge perfromances from Matthew McConghey ('Killer Joe' & 'The Paper Boy), Nicole Kidman ('The Paper Boy'), John Hawkes and Helen Hunt ('The Sessions') as well as Daniel Day Lewis ('Lincoln') Anthony Hopkins (Hitchcock) and the whole cast of 'Django Unchained'.

As usual, John and I didn't always agree especially in the case of my number 1 and number 2 pick...'Django Unchained' (#1) and 'Lincoln' (#2), but there were some films that surprisingly we were in accord...'The Intouchables' 'The Perks Of Being A Wallflower', 'Silver Linings Playbook', 'Killer Joe', and 'Life Of Pi...(of course in different order)

One thing is for sure, all the films on our list received at least 4 bagels out of 5 from both of us...And they transported us to some really magical places. The films we picked inspired us, made us laugh, shocked us, informed us and for the most part, definitely touched our hearts and minds. And that's what aI good film should always do.

So check out our video for more of our silly banter, and here's to a New Year that hopefully will have lots and lots of '5 bagel films'. It's always more fun to like something than to hate it.

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