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How to make it as a Jew in Hollywood?

by Brad A. Greenberg

October 23, 2008 | 5:48 pm

I think VideoJew Jay Firestone has outdone himself with this latest installment (above) to his guide to Los Angeles. Part Four focuses on making it in Hollywood, the surrogate Zion. The video includes Michael Bayesque special effects and Jay’s very own laugh track.

His tips include “getting arrested or following in the footsteps of Paris Hilton and Pamela Anderson and create a video everyone wants to see.” Really, Jay, I’m disappointed. How could you not mention with Paris and Pamela the one and only Dustin Diamond? We knew him growing up as Screech, the geek-cum-creep whose resurrected his career—ehem—with his own sex tape. (Sorry, this knowledge is a holdover from the I contributed to at the LA Daily News.

In other Hollywood Jew news, Danielle Berrin has a fascinating cover story this week for The Jewish Journal about writer-director Brett Ratner, a former yeshiva boy gone sort of bad. Ratner’s narcissism and come-ons to a reporter are disgusting, but they make for good color. The most interesting dialogue, though, is between Ratner and “Bugsy” writer James Toback. Both are under the impression that Jews no longer control Hollywood. Here’s a bit:

“Jews used to run Hollywood,” Toback chimes in. “But what we see now is the diminishing of Jews in power.”

Toback proceeds to rattle off the names of media moguls.

“Rupert Murdoch, not a Jew; Bob Iger, not a Jew ....”

(For the record: Iger, head of The Walt Disney Co., is a Jew.)

“Walt Disney hated Jews,” Ratner says.

“Sumner Redstone is a Jew, but he’d probably like not to be, since his real name is Sumner Rothstein, but he is a Jew, so that’s one, but then Kerkorian—well, Kerkorian is out of the business now. There are so few f—-ing places with Jews left. Oh and Sony,” Toback adds.

I mention Amy Pascal, co-chair of Sony Pictures Entertainment.

“I’m talking about the corporate control,” Toback fires. “Amy Pascal is an employee—the people who can fire Amy Pascal.”

“The Jews have lost ownership of the movie business,” Toback claims.

Sony Pictures CEO and co-chairman, Michael Lynton, also is Jewish. Honestly, I’m not sure what Hollywood these two are talking about. Sure Laemmle and Thalberg and Wasserman are long since dead. But there are a lot of Jews still running the show in Tinsel Town. Not that there is anything wrong with that, Bill Donahue.

The rest of Danielle’s article can be read here.

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Since launching the blog in 2007, I’ve referred to myself as “a God-fearing Christian with devilishly good Jewish looks.” The description, I’d say, is an accurate one,...

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