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Tag: Advice

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  • Can’t ‘Handel’ the Heat?

    By Naomi Pfefferman

    July 8, 2004 | 8:00 pm

    "'Fahrenheit 9/11,' what a piece of garbage," says radio host Bill Handel.

    He's livid, because a caller has suggested the Bush-bashing film is partially true: "So if I have pictures of you screwing goats, and that's only 25 percent of the story, is that OK," he retorts before hanging...

  • Love the Stranger

    By Rabbi Zoë Klein

    April 29, 2004 | 8:00 pm

    The freeways were quiet and the city seemed peaceful at 4:30 a.m. as I drove to the hospital. I was going to see Thelma before she was taken in for surgery. I thought about the time just over a year ago when Thelma arrived at our house at 3 a.m., tiptoeing in so as not to wake...

  • A Manual for the Auntie-to-Be

    By Erika Dreifus

    April 8, 2004 | 8:00 pm

    It seemed that lots of people -- including total strangers -- had plenty of advice to offer my sister and my brother-in-law before the birth of their first child, an event the entire extended family anticipated for late summer 2003. And it wasn't just a matter of kindly (if...

  • Functional Seating to Avoid Teen Chaos

    By Julia Kay

    March 11, 2004 | 7:00 pm

    It had been perfectly planned. For my brother's bar mitzvah reception, each member of our family was responsible for sitting with and entertaining a particular constituency. Eric had his friends and younger cousins. My parents had the adults. And I, the older sister, had everyone...

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  • Teen’s Loss of Sister Spurs Charity Efforts

    By Andrea Adelson

    March 4, 2004 | 7:00 pm

    Seventeen-year-old Megan Knofsky keeps alive her sibling's memory by sustaining a teen support group that raises money for research to find a cure for cystic fibrosis, the genetic disorder that affects 30,000 people and claimed her sister, Sarah, in 1997.

    Two years ago, Knofsky of...

  • The Circuit

    By Gaby Wenig

    October 23, 2003 | 8:00 pm

    Una-Daters Unite

    Nearly 1,600 people packed Sinai Temple Oct. 10 for the Westwood synagogue's monthly "Friday Night Live" singles summit, where a Toronto transplant said she was, "looking for modern, chivalrous men."

    The temple's hallways were "like a Fellini film," said a bachelor...

  • Letting Go of Marlene

    By Rona Frances

    September 4, 2003 | 8:01 pm

    Four years ago, Marlene Adler Marks called me to ask for advice. At the time we had known each other for several years, but we were not close friends.

    After she called me, we embarked on one of the most profound journeys: I shared from my experiences in life and she shared her...

  • The Friend Zone

    By Carin Davis

    August 7, 2003 | 8:00 pm

    Jay and I met watching college hoops at Maloney's in March. He's a Syracuse fan who came to believe his team would only win when my tush was on the bar stool next to his. Apparently, I give good karma. Hoping to get lucky, Jay had me sit next to him for the entire NCAA tournament. It...

  • Simcha Stress and Bridal Blues

    By Elisa Albert

    July 10, 2003 | 8:00 pm

    Whenever I tell someone about my impending nuptials, the reaction is the same. First come the whoops of joy and the chorus of "Mazel Tovs!"

    Then, invariably, the tone shifts. Faces fall.

    "How are you?" they ask, in much the same tone one might hear at a shiva call. "How are things...

  • He’s No Robert Redford

    By Adam Wills

    May 15, 2003 | 8:00 pm

    An Irish multimillionaire pining for a London teacher offered her husband $1 million to divorce her in a real-life "Indecent Proposal" that has scandalized London's Orthodox Jewish community, according to a May 4 report in London's Sunday Times.

    Brian Maccaba made the offer to Alan...

  • Here Comes the Price: Buying Gifts

    By Jodi Werner

    May 8, 2003 | 8:00 pm

    Please follow me through a short exercise (choosing from the options in parentheses to tailor it to your own experience):

    Your friend (since elementary school/from graduate school/of the family) calls to tell you that she's gotten engaged. You're thrilled, and you scream with her...

  • Worst-Case Scenarios

    By Rob Eshman

    March 27, 2003 | 7:00 pm

    Now that the war has turned messy, unpredictable, bloody and cruel (i.e., into a war), it takes no special insight to assume that its violence will spill over onto our shores.

    Our public safety officials in Los Angeles have identified 549 sites as high-risk targets, among them Los...

  • Fear & Duct Tape in Los Angeles

    By Wendy J. Madnick

    February 20, 2003 | 7:00 pm

    When the U.S. Homeland Security Advisory System was raised to Code Orange on Feb. 7, indicating a high risk of a terrorist attack, the anxiety level of the Jewish community in Los Angeles rose with it.

    "Our office staff was a lot more anxious that day, to say the least," said Rabbi...

  • Five Elements of a Fairy-Tale Marriage

    By Wendy J. Madnick

    February 13, 2003 | 7:00 pm

    "The Committed Marriage" by Esther Jungreis (Harper San Francisco, $23.95).



    At first glance, the title of Esther Jungreis' new book, "The Committed Marriage," seems a bit redundant. After all, isn't commitment the whole point of getting married?

    But what Jungreis explains is...

  • How Not to Date

    By Teresa Strasser

    February 13, 2003 | 7:00 pm

    Look, I'm not going to tell you how to find "the one," how to radiate that "I'm available" light, how to register for wine tasting seminars and join networking groups.

    I have no dating advice. None. I won't suggest clever phrasing for your personal ad or how to choose a photo to...

  • Ethics and Ironies

    By Rabbi Avi Shafran

    November 14, 2002 | 7:00 pm

    At least Ann Landers admitted when she was wrong.

    And while she may have used a pseudonym, Esther Pauline "Eppie" Lederer claimed only to offer one woman's point of view -- no more, no less.

    Times, alas, have changed, and along with them, The New York Times, whose Sunday Magazine's...

  • Talking to Children about Terrorism

    By Wendy Mogel

    September 20, 2001 | 8:00 pm

    We are all going crazy. That Tuesday I woke up my 10-year-old by telling her, "Terrorists flew planes into buildings in New York and Washington, D.C., this morning," carried her downstairs half-asleep and sat her in front of the television just in time to watch the north tower fall....

  • Ask Wendy

    By Wendy Belzberg

    May 17, 2001 | 8:00 pm

    His Cheatin' Heart

    Dear Wendy,

    My best friend discovered that her husband has been having a long-term affair. First she wept on my shoulder, then she asked me what I thought she should do? Is there a right answer to that question? She and her husband have three small children...

  • Ask Wendy

    By Wendy Belzberg

    April 19, 2001 | 8:00 pm

    Unmarried at 40

    Dear Wendy,

    My youngest brother, Azer, is 40 years old and not married or dating anyone seriously. He is a kohen and will not marry a widow, divorcee or a convert, which excludes most of the eligible women I know in his age category. My Orthodox relatives in...

  • Don’t-Knock-It-Till-You-Try-It.Com

    By Michael Aushenker

    November 23, 2000 | 7:00 pm

    Two summers ago, I was staying with an old Cornell buddy in Manhattan - we'll call him Andrew - who was in a state of despair over his personal life. Andrew - a thoughtful, introverted individual - never quite felt comfortable in large social situations. Even during the height of...

  • Advice on life and relationships

    September 21, 2000 | 8:00 pm

    The Stranger She Divorced

    Dear Deborah,
    I have been divorced for four years - I left him - and am still in a state of shock by what has become of my ex-husband. I married an honest man who became a liar. I married a kind and caring man who became cruel. I married a responsible man who...

  • Finding Support

    By Wendy J. Madnick

    September 9, 1999 | 8:00 pm

    On a Wednesday night, about a dozen parents of children with developmental disabilities gather at Sinai Temple, a Conservative synagogue on the Westside. They meet to knock down barriers and dispel myths, to offer a shoulder to cry on and good advice on working the system of state...
  • Advice for the Yom Kippur Fast

    October 1, 1998 | 8:00 pm

    An expert at Hadassah-Hebrew University Medical Center hasinvaluable advice for your Yom Kippur fast.

    According to Dr. Elliot Berry, head of clinical nutrition at theHebrew University-Hadassah Medical School, there are a number ofthings you can do in advance to ease your fasting:

      ...

  • Helping Those in the Shadows

    By John R. Fishel

    September 10, 1998 | 8:00 pm

    In a Jewish community the size and scope of ours, it is sometimes easy to lose sight of the small acts of kindness that define our concern for justice and quality of life.

    The Jewish Community Chaplaincy Program of the Board of Rabbis of Southern California provides such acts. There's...

  • Dear Deborah

    By Deborah Berger

    August 7, 1998 | 8:00 pm

    Nice, Decent and But

    Dear Deborah,

    The three worst words in the English language for a single man are "nice," "decent" and "but," as in "You're a nice, decent man, but let's just be friends."

    A single...

  • Dear Deborah

    By Deborah Berger

    March 5, 1998 | 7:00 pm

    Dear Deborah,

    My girlfriend of three months, some friends, one of her employees and I went out to dinner the other night. This employee is a friend of my girlfriend's, and they socialize frequently. The problem I have with this employee-friend is that sheis competitive and always...

  • Dear Deborah

    By Deborah Berger

    October 16, 1997 | 8:00 pm

    Deborah Berger-Reiss is a West Los Angelespsychotherapist.

    All rights reserved by author


    Hooked on Rejection

    Dear Deborah,

    My 17-year-old son is hooked on a girl. She's everything he sayshe wishes he could be and everything he knows we wish he couldbe. She's sure to be valedictorian, on...

  • Dear Deborah

    By Deborah Berger

    September 18, 1997 | 8:00 pm

    Untitled, by Rose Mandel, 1947. Photofrom Catalogue of Pacific Dreams (Armand Hammer Museum 1995)

    Middle-Aged Marriage

    Dear Deborah,

    Why is it so much more difficult to recover fromour middle-age marital difficulties than it was when we were in our20s? We used to be able to...

  • Caught in the Interim

    By Naomi Pfefferman

    August 28, 1997 | 8:00 pm

    In Rabbi Michael Katz's office at Cal State Northridge Hillel hanga "Star Trek" poster and a picture of Binyamin Netanyahu. There'salso a futon -- not your basic college-issue office furniture.

    The new interim director, who has worked at CSUN Hillel since1986, is obviously a man of...

  • Dear Deborah

    By Deborah Berger

    August 21, 1997 | 8:00 pm


    Roller-Coaster Life

    Dear Deborah,

    I have had a strange, traumatic, roller-coaster life, but I havefinally settled down with a truly wonderful man. The problem I haveis that I cannot understand why I feel so empty and have no sexualdesire whatsoever for my prince.

    When I was small, my...

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