Apparently, the evidence is mounting. Let’s examine it, shall we?
1. I don’t talk about having a boyfriend/husband, looking for one, or wanting one, or about how important my straight straightness is.
2. I don’t seem to obsess over my appearance. (for the record, I don’t really understand what this means. I wear lipstick. I look in the mirror several times before leaving the house.)
3. I have outspoken feminist and gender politics, and this means I talk a lot about queer stuff.
It’s clear, based on this evidence, that I must be queer myself, although I identify as straight. (It’s okay if you’re surprised. I’ll give you a moment to reorientate your universe….and now, please, continue reading.)
My sexuality has been up for interpretation for a long time, apparently, as I’ve recently learned. Most people assume I’m queer, for the reasons I’ve listed above, and probably others that I’m not thinking of. I don’t freak out or try to correct them, but as a feminist and someone who works for justice, I do claim my heterosexual privilege when it’s important to being an ally.
If I say I’m straight, people don’t believe me, because I don’t perform according to the version of a sterotypical straight woman. There is so much danger here, in keeping people trapped in rigid gender performance, it literally hurts everyone, it’s the ultimate expression of sexism and homophobia working in tandem. In order to be convincing, I would have to be a different person, apparently, but that would probably make others feel better. They’d be able to figure me out.