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Letters to the Editor: Seidler-Feller, Fish in a Barrel, Prager

I found the angry letters condemning The Jewish Journal for its profile of Rabbi Chaim Seidler-Feller (“To Nudge and to Support,” April 30) to be so cruel and unforgiving. By including Seidler-Feller’s 2003 physical assault of a female journalist and his subsequent apology and teshuvah, The Journal offered a fair rendering of the rabbi as a worthy yet flawed human being, like the rest of us.
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May 11, 2010

In support of Rabbi Grater’s efforts

As members of the Pasadena Jewish Temple and Center, we write to support the efforts of our Rabbi Joshua Levine Grater to fight for social and economic justice in the United States, the Middle East, and globally.  A handful of current and former members recently wrote a letter last week to the Jewish Journal attacking Rabbi Grater for his outspoken views, including his support for President Barack Obama. We disagree.

We admire Rabbi Grater for his courage in tackling controversial topics in his sermons, his writings, and his public actions.  His support for Israel is unswerving and is reflected in many aspects of our congregation’s life and activities.  At the same time, his criticism of certain policies of the Israeli government reflects Judaism’s prophetic tradition of speaking truth to power.

As a scholar and spiritual leader, he draws on Jewish tradition not only to educate the congregation and the public about the importance of combating social injustice but also to stir debate.  He actively encourages a diversity of opinion and dialogue within the synagogue. Since he arrived at PJTC seven years ago, Rabbi Grater has emerged as a powerful voice of conscience and commitment. We value his leadership, as do the overwhelming majority of members of our congregation, which recently renewed his contract .  We do not agree on all social and political issues, but we share a common admiration for Rabbi Grater’s bold leadership.


Susan Auerbach, Hal Barron, Jared Becker,  Cindy Cohen,  Douglas Crane,  Mike Davidson, Peter Dreier,  Mark Esensten, Jennie Factor,  Betty Fishman,  Jane Fishman, Yudie Fishman,  Cecilia Fox,  Jon Fuhrman,  Rebecca Golbert,  Claire Gorfinkel,  Allen Gross, Karen Gross,  John Guest,  Sandy Hartford, Ed Honowitz, Cara Jaffe,  Susan Kane,  Patricia Kirkish,  Kathy Kobayashi, Sandra Lavine, David Lorin. Brian Mark, Madeline Mark, Maureen McGrath, Peter Mendel,  Terry Meng,  Amy Nettleton; Jenny Owen, Ellen Pais, Meredith Rose, Glenn Rothner,  Faith Segal, Mickey Segal, Diana Selig,  Ruth Several, Mike Several,    Debby Singer, Jack Singer, Jonathan Swerdlow, Ruth Wolman,  Steven Youra.


We Are Commanded to Forgive

I found the angry letters condemning The Jewish Journal for its profile of Rabbi Chaim Seidler-Feller (“To Nudge and to Support,” April 30) to be so cruel and unforgiving. By including Seidler-Feller’s 2003 physical assault of a female journalist and his subsequent apology and teshuvah, The Journal offered a fair rendering of the rabbi as a worthy yet flawed human being, like the rest of us.

The letter writers should get off their high horses and remember, “It is forbidden to be obdurate and not allow yourself to be appeased. On the contrary, one should be easily pacified and find it difficult to become angry. When asked by an offender for forgiveness, one should forgive with a sincere mind and a willing spirit … forgiveness is natural to the seed of Israel” (Mishnah Torah,Teshuva 2:10).

Stephen F. Rohde
Los Angeles


‘Fish in a Barrel’ Is Provocative Bait

Thank you for your terrific column on online dating from the perspective of middle-age Jewish women (“Fish in a Barrel,” May 7). This is a sorry truth that many of us know, but it is gratifying to read your unflinching description of the dramatic gender imbalance that creates the context in which single Jewish women conduct [their] love lives. I understand why you hung your column on the hook of Mother’s Day, but I trust you realize that the desire for a companion is not the same as the desire for a father for a child. There are many other dimensions to the lives of Jewish singles — of all ages — that I hope The Journal will continue to explore. Reverence for the chuppah should not be taken to invalidate or diminish the various and interesting ways of living — and loving — that more and more of us enjoy outside of matrimony. 

Ellen Carol DuBois
Los Angeles


Rob Eshman’s column was on point, condoning interdating and the notion it could lead to intermarriage, Jewish conversion and making more Jews. Yes, intermarriage can be positive. More must be done in the opposite situation to keep committed Jews from straying when rabbis fail to recognize them as Jews because they were adopted.

Recently, a rabbi was approached by two life-long Jews to perform a marriage ceremony, but he was not so eager to accept the gig because the bride-to-be was adopted. It did not matter that her bat mitzvah was in Israel, the parents who adopted her in infancy are Jewish, and Judaism is the only religion she ever has known.

The rabbi said she must appear before a council of rabbis to be questioned about her Jewishness, and she must go to a mikveh. He also had the chutzpah to tell her she must seek pre-marriage counseling because the couple does not know each other long enough.

Let’s hope all segments of the rabbinate will be supportive to the notion proposed in the editor’s column as one way to add to the declining Jewish population. But let’s pray that religious dogma does not contribute to chasing committed Jews away.

Roger Pondel
Los Angeles


It is with great unhappiness that I write my comments on a recent article in The Jewish Journal. In “Fish in a Barrel,” Editor-in-Chief Rob Eshman writes, “Why not create a ‘path to Jewishness’ that begins with interdating? Interdating has existed for centuries, in reality; why not codify, organize and condone it? The alternative isn’t just fewer Jews, it’s more loneliness.”

Since when does Eshman justify ignoring the institutions of the Torah to marry Jewish? The very first intermarried Jewish woman recorded in the Torah was Dina, the daughter of our Patriarch Jacob. When that happened, all hell broke loose! Not only did the Jewish woman Dina get ostracized from her family, the whole town of non-Jews were wiped out by her brothers Shimon and Levi. The lesson for intermarriage was very clear in those days. There was no talk in the Torah of feeling Dina’s loneliness. No one spoke of intermarriage as a way to increase the numbers of Jews.

I live in the South Bay where there is a very high rate of intermarriage. I am very sensitive and caring. But I always remember, as a rabbi, it is one thing to help an intermarried couple make sense of their lives’ decisions, but to suggest an intermarriage is always wrong. And I believe no Jew is to be left out of the congregation.

JDate was made by Jewish people for Jewish people. How sad it is that we have turned the pyramid upside down on its head. Putting the top goal of providing lonely Jewish people a way to become happy married Jewish people. To suggest that JDate be used to cure loneliness is insane. What will it cost, you may ask? To me, it’s the cost of the future of the Jewish nation.

As we approach our holiday of Shavuot, celebrating the giving of our Torah, it would do us good to remember the following facts.

The answer to intermarrying is inner faith. Shavuot reminds us of conversion.  King David’s family was established from a converted Ruth, the Moabite. Moses, our greatest prophet, married Tzippora, a converted Midianite. Rabbi Akiva, the leader of the Jewish people, came from a converted family. Even Joshua, who took the Jewish people into the Promised Land, married Yael, who converted.

In all the cases, there was no talk of allowance being made for loneliness. If anything, and when needed, there was conversion, and the rest is history.

We need to reach out and help the lonely ones find their soul mates. So, for many fish that are stuck in the barrels while other fish take their time, remember, when in the barrel they get more pickled and more wanted, getting ready to be married with a Jewish person.

Rabbi Eli Hecht
Chabad of South Bay


There is a major flaw in Rob Eshman’s reasoning in his story and that is the assumption: no Jewish husband, no Jewish children! I have no Jewish husband and yet I have three beautiful Jewish children — Eliana, Lev and Ian — perpetuating the Jewish religion, Jewish values and Jewish education. You see, I am single and I chose to have children without a husband. Yet I am honoring the patriarchs of my family (my father and grandfather) since my last name is still my father’s and continuing a legacy as my two sons are named after my father, each taking one of his Hebrew birth names. I will agree that this is not the ideal for most women who want (need?) a partner, and certainly the financial commitments are enormous, but it can and has been done.

Robin Ann Gorelick
Calabasas


After only a few years, Rob Eshman has once again encouraged intermarriage and expects us to consider it. Consider the destruction of our people, religion and nation. For thousands of years, Jews kept themselves Jewish through marriage with other Jews. Samaritans, followers of a sister religion, nearly died out because of intermarriage. The best we can hope for is “chrismaka” for the next generation before the Jews are left for the history books.

Daniel Pereg
Beverly Hills


Rob Eshman’s idea of Jewish women marrying non-Jews and hoping to lead by example for them to convert has merit. The woman is the likely one to lead the family in faith.

While in college in the early ’70s, my Jewish roommate swore she’d marry a Jewish man. Growing up unaffiliated, I couldn’t see why it was such a big deal. Forty years later, I was shocked to find she married a non-Jew and didn’t maintain the faith for her two sons. I married a Jewish man, converted and keep a Jewish home.

With intermarriage, you win some and you lose some. My college roommate didn’t lead by example and her husband was not inspired to convert. In my situation, it did work. Intermarriage is here to stay, and it is up to the Jewish partner to practice his or her faith and hope it takes hold.

Kathleen Vallee Stein
via e-mail


Crime and Punishment

In the article “New Documentary ‘Casino Jack’ Considers Abramoff’s Jewish Roots” (May 7), the writer identified Goldman Sachs CEO Lloyd Blankfein, along with Abramoff and Bernard Madoff, as “the recent roster of financial manipulators.” Abramoff and Madoff are convicted “financial manipulators” and currently incarcerated. Mr. Blankfein has been named in a suit by the SEC charging Goldman Sachs and one executive (not Mr. Blankfein) with fraud. Goldman Sachs has stated, “The SEC’s charges are completely unfounded in law and fact,” and it said, “We will vigorously contest them and defend the firm and its reputation.”

The Jewish Journal should be more careful about editing articles it publishes.

Lewis J. Kaufman
Santa Monica


Election Name-calling

I was very privileged to volunteer for President Obama in the last election. I worked in the Las Vegas office for nine weeks before the election. I canvassed thousands of voters. I cannot even count the number of registered Republicans (many Jewish) who repeatedly compared our president to Adolf Hitler. And believe me, Mr. Prager (“When Jews on the Left See Americans on the Right as Nazis,” May 7), their point of view had absolutely nothing to do with his economic policies. This misplaced rhetoric flows both ways.

Martin H. Kodish
Woodland Hills


Correction

Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion regrets the error in last’s week advertisement announcing its student and alumni degree recipients. Dr. George M. Goodwin was listed incorrectly.

THE JEWISH JOURNAL welcomes letters from all readers. Letters should be no more than 200 words and must include a valid name, address and phone number. Letters sent via e-mail must not contain attachments. We reserve the right to edit all letters. Mail: The Jewish Journal, Letters, 3580 Wilshire Blvd., Suite 1510, Los Angeles, CA 90010; e-mail: {encode=”letters@jewishjournal.com” title=”letters@jewishjournal.com”}; or fax: (213) 368-1684.

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