September 7, 2011
When you think of a born-and-bred Brooklyn girl, blond-haired Stacey probably isn’t what comes to mind. When she pulls up to meet me, she’s on a pink scooter in a black outfit layered with pink — pink nail polish, a long, pink scarf, even a pink cover on her iPhone. She looks like Reese Witherspoon in “Legally Blonde.” She even worked in a law firm as a paralegal for a year: “It was a good experience for me because I realized it was not what I wanted to do with my life.” Instead, she became a doctor.
When she was young she wanted to be a doctor, but everyone dissuaded her. A doctor friend told her that it wasn’t about helping people — it was just about HMOs and prescribing medicine. After quitting her job at the law firm, she decided to go to medical school. “I’ll be different. I’ll be the one who can change the world, so to speak.”
Stacey’s sister is a naturopathic doctor: “I thought she was a hippie tree hugger who lost her mind, and I didn’t understand why she didn’t go to regular medical school and just learn about herbs [on her own].” While taking a year’s worth of pre-med requirements, Stacey took a part-time job at a naturopathic clinic at her school’s pharmacy. She quickly discovered that “the doctors were happy, loved what they did, and the students were bright-eyed and excited. With my own eyes I saw the patients getting better. I heard amazing things. Everywhere you go there’s the same standard of care, and if it doesn’t work, you hit a wall, and it’s done. Even if what I do is just as effective, it’s less toxic than the other route. I’m just really happy that I waited it out and searched to find what makes me happy, because it would suck to hate what you do.”
She moved to California, joined a couple of practices, and recently ventured out to open her own office. “For the first time since leaving New York, I don’t hate where I live.” So now she’s putting down roots and looking for a man.
Stacey wants an ambitious guy who has goals, a sense of humor, passion for whatever he’s doing, and likes music and dancing. “I want him to be like me, I guess. Be able to work hard and play hard. I work my ass off but I play — I play hard.”
I ask about dating, and she says, “I want to take control, but I know you need to let the man do that. At least for the courtship portion, I want to be courted. I used to be women’s lib — I’ll hold the door and split the check … and I don’t want that anymore. I think it’s emasculating for the man. And I like when a man holds the door open for you. I think it’s a lost art, chivalry, in this day and age.”
Although Stacey snowboards, parties at night and loves Burning Man, she also says, “I like to relax, sit on the beach and worship the sun. There’s a whole bunch of L.A. I haven’t seen yet.”
She tells me she wants a man who’s mature and young. “Well, young at heart. I don’t really like dating younger guys. I feel like I’m their mom. I don’t want to take care of someone. I don’t want them taking care of me. I want us to take care of each other.”
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Seth Menachem is an actor and writer living in Los Angeles with his wife and daughter. You can see more of his work on his Web site, sethmenachem.com, and meet even more single peeps at mysinglepeeps.com.