October 13, 2010 | 6:21 pm

Chef Etiquette 101

Posted by Chef Todd Aarons

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“So who cooks at your home”, said with the implication that I must edge out my wife from any cooking apparatus in my house because my profession is being a Chef. 

If I had a dime for every time I heard that proverbial question.  If I were to cook at home who would pay me?

Listen, only the ultra wealthy have chefs at home that cook for them.  So you’re a proctologist who s@!*#%  their f*@!#%$ up you’re a#$ at home? Is this a question you ask all professionals or is this question special to my profession only since cooking is an act of the domestic home professional as well. 

The family has to eat - I wonder if the chef cooks at home? Just so my kids don’t starve, I do occasionally put a pop tart in the toaster or spread peanut butter and jelly or make that Bon Maman confiture on bread. I believe I have a heightened awareness of what is good and wholesome food, but nowadays with the amount foodies read and watch about the culinary world I’m not alone. 

The act of preparing food as a normal function of home life does not fall under the definition of Chef.  The question of what you make for the holidays is exempt from this line of questioning since our chef talents are put into effect for the sake of hospitality and the fact that we are off from our paid position that day.  It is though rather insulting to make the parallel of what we do in the restaurant to the domestic production of food on a daily basis.  “Well you love making food so you must do it all the time, whenever you get a chance right?”

If people would only stop and use their internal filters before actually vocalizing this question. Women in particularly want to know if there is a home kitchen rivalry between my wife and I. The answer is we both make reservations well.  How fortunate I do feel that I enjoy what I do as a profession but that does not mean I need to do it after the 10 hour day in my restaurant kitchen when I get home. I am actually a very complex individual with other interests and facets to my life including long walks on moonlit beaches and needlepoint. if I go two days without hearing this question from an unaware patron again it will be to soon. Please be kind to the chefs you chat up table side as you enjoy their art and leave their home life aside from the inquiry. Chefs want to know that you respect them for what they accomplished in their professional kitchens and that you are pleasantly satiated after your meal.