August 6, 2010
The Real Housewives of DC Are An Embarrassment To Bravo
These women are horrible, and the show is offensive. It is not about watching a reality television train wreck, but rather a being dragged slowly through the gutter.
Mary: Texts while driving, likes to talk about her famous grandfather, and outing where her famous neighbors live. Beautiful family, and enough Botox to kill a horse.
Stacie: Real estate agent, went to Harvard, married with two kids, token African American. First impression is I could be her friend.
Lynda: Runs a modeling agency, married twice, currently divorced, four kids, boyfriend who is 17 years her junior. Thinks she is the star.
Michaele: White House crasher, celebrity wannabe, married for money. There is nothing classy about this woman and she comes across as an idiot. Just because you wear expensive clothes, they don’t make you fancy.
Cat: English, pretentious, looks like she could have been a prostitute in her youth. She is a snob, not particularly attractive or entertaining. She is full of herself, and appears to be full of crap.
We meet the ladies at a polo match, and watching Michaele flutter around the event is nauseating. She is the most awkward hugger ever, a celebrity whore, and married to a total sleaze bag. Cat arrives and is pretentious. Michaele promises to take her horseback riding, and makes Cat pinky swear that they will make it happen. Really? It’s a disgrace she is on television.
Some chick name Edwina is there and is trying to somehow be considered one of the housewives, but she’s not, and she should be thanking God that she isn’t. I’m mortified by this show after only 10 minutes. It’s Mary’s birthday and they are planning a party. She needs to pick out an outfit, and her closet door will not open without a scan of her thumb print.
At the party we learn that everyone pronounces Michaele’s name differently, and nobody appears to like her very much, nor does she correct anyone, so we really have no idea what the hell her name is. Lynda seems to think she is a first tier socialite, while Michaele is a second or third tier. She is annoyed the crashers were invited. Michaele is talking about party crashing.
Lynda is bitter and seems jealous, Stacie is annoyed that Michaele is invited to things she is not, and all the while the birthday girl is getting hammered. She is drunk off her ass and in her drunken stupor, she says because we have an African American president, all the hair salons in DC should be integrated so regardless of race, can get their hair done together. Oh. My. God.
Cats husband is as pretentious as she is. Mary’s husband appears to be either gay, or living with a completely broken spirit from the bossiness of his wife. He clearly married for money. Lynda starts spreading rumors that Michaele is anorexic. The truth is she is thin, but it’s not the first thing you notice. She is really awkward, a little frantic, and zooms around like a bee.
Stacie is having a cooking party at her house. Cat is there and she appears to be quite uncomfortable around black people. She stereotypes everything and everyone. She makes very awkward television. She talks crap about President Obama, says how great President Bush was, and likes to talk about only herself. Seriously, this show needs to be cancelled.
I’m not sure I can watch this show again. It’s brutal. The housewives of all the other cities were watchable because they were suspended from reality. DC somehow makes them steeped in reality, and it’s not cool. We see the vibrancy of DC, and it seems dirty because of them. Andy Cohen needs to stop worrying about money, and start focusing on keeping the faith.