December 1, 2010
Public Displays of Affection vs. Public Displays of Sex
I’ve always been big on PDA’s. I think it’s lovely to walk holding hands, or to grab a quick kiss when out and about with someone I care about. There are many ways to show affection in public and my personal favorite is when the man I am with places his hand on the small of back.
He is protecting me, showing me off, guiding me, claiming me, and at the core of it all, touching me in a personal yet completely acceptable way. I love it. I am a very tactile person and I think touch is important, so for me PDA’s are simply part of a relationship.
I like to think I am an open-minded person. I certainly am in terms of physical relations between two consenting adults. I have written before, and will reiterate now that sex is one of the best things about being a grown up. When you are old enough to handle the emotions that go with it, it is fantastic.
Sex is more than being physical. There are emotional aspects of sex that are more powerful than the physical, and that’s why I think sex gets better when you get older. We are able to appreciate it for all it is, and are better able to handle the feelings of our minds, hearts and bodies.
Just when I think I am cool about sex, I am forced to face the facts that I really might not be. Yesterday, while at the post office, I witnessed two people in line having sex. Depending on what your definition of sex is, you may or may not agree, but for me, they were going at it.
The man appeared to be in his late 40’s and the woman was perhaps late 30’s. It was hard to tell as her face was down the throat of her boyfriend. I am assuming it was her boyfriend, as she was not wearing a ring. Or a bra. I know about the bra as I saw her breast as he fondled it.
They were in line, he had one hand was on her boob and the other grabbing her hair. She had one hand on his neck and the other on his crotch. They were kissing and clearly engaged, but completely silent. Not a peep. I watched in fascination as did the other people in line.
As the line moved forward, so did they, without missing a beat. We shuffled, they shuffled. It was hilarious and the first time I watched porn while waiting in line to send mail. For those of you who read my blog on a regular basis, you know I was not going to keep quiet.
I tapped the woman on the shoulder and told her I was sorry to interrupt but her breast was exposed and I thought she should know. It took her a minute to gather her composure, and when she did, she was lovely, as was her boyfriend. They were a little embarrassed but fine.
She apologized, straightened her blouse, laughed, gave him a kiss, then turned to me and said thank you. I told her I didn’t know whether to turn away or order a drink. They told me they were sorry, looked around, and anyone who was looking got an apology too.
We then all waited in line, mailed our items and life went on. It was odd, but just another day in LA. I finished my postal business, headed to my car and saw the couple outside making out again. I walked past and suggested they get a room before they were arrested.
The man then told me that rather than only watching them, I should join in. The woman laughed, kissed him, then looked at me and said it would be fun. I thanked them for the lovely offer, told them I would wait for their movie to come out, and wished them a happy holiday season.
I was dying to know what their deal was but didn’t have the time to ask. By not having the time to ask of course I mean they scared the crap out of me and I could not get away fast enough. As I drove back to work I decided my imagination was probably going to be better than their reality.
Was he just out of prison and at the post office to mail his probation officer something and they could not stop touching each other because he had been away so long? Was he married and he just dropped off his wife and kids at the airport and was now with his mistress?
Had he met her online just that morning? Were they just a couple in love? Was she a hooker and he needed to mail something and did not want to waste the time he had already paid for? Were they porn stars rehearsing for a film about a mail carrier that sleeps with women on his route?
Perhaps they were regular people who have no idea what appropriate public behavior is. Sex is fabulous. I seem to recall it was fabulous. I am of the belief however that it should be private. By private of course I mean do it wherever you want, just without people watching.
I liked this couple. They were not afraid to live their lives out loud and I applaud their gumption. They were free and that is awesome. I hope I meet a man who likes public displays of affection. To clarify, appropriate public displays of affection not public displays of sex.
People are fascinating and while this couple was intimidating, they inspired me to not give up on finding love. I’m going with the story that they are just two people in love and want the world to see that love is available to everyone who is keeping the faith.
JewishJournal.com is produced by TRIBE Media Corp., a non-profit media company whose mission is to inform, connect and enlighten community