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April 4, 2011

Celebrity Apprentice: Busey Rocks, Meatloaf Cracks & Michael Jackson Helps

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The Trumps

I love this show and this season is fabulous.  Any show that allows Gary Busey to be Gary Busey, throws in the freak show of any member of the Jackson family, the ego of Star Jones, and the simple fabulousness of NeNe Leakes, is pure dynamite.  This season, after 3 weeks, has hit its stride. 

Dionne Warwick was sent home last week and her parting words to NeNe were that she was a coward.  NeNe tells Trump Dionne was an “old, bossy lady”.  It’s was sweet of her actually because in reality, Dionne was a crazy old hag who lost her mind and legend or not, she is now known as crazy.

It’s an art challenge.  The celebs need to make art, then sell it in a gallery, along with each of them designing a baseball cap for sale at the gallery.  John Rich is project manager for the men and Marlee Matlin for the women. Gary Busey explains the importance of art to us.  Perfection.

Sidebar:  Gary Busey is divine.  He is entertaining, charming, whack, and delicious.  At first glance it would appear that he makes no sense, but really, if you just listen, he is a genius.  I freaking love him and I want to read a book of his quotes and thoughts on life.  This guy is crazy gold.  Charlie Sheen who?

Jose Canseco bails because his dad, who has been ill, takes a bad turn.  Since they taped the show his father passed away.  His life continues to be a crapfest so it’s good he left when he did so as to keep his demise away from Celebrity Apprentice.  I’m sure Trump is relieved he bailed when he did.

Richard Hatch tells the camera he thinks Jose made it up so he could bail rather than get kicked off.  Important to note: Richard hatch is a disgusting pig.  He is a mess, and lucky he even made it onto this show.  He is a liar, a cheat, a scumbag, and the ultimate douchelord.  Was I clear on my thoughts?

At the art supply store, Meatloaf gets pissed off at Gary.  Gary asks him if he is getting canvases for everyone, and Meatloaf translates that to Busey asking him if he’s getting all his stuff.  It’s ridiculous.  Gary is a little off, but he’s not a liar, and certainly did nothing to warrant Meatloaf losing his mind.

Back with the ladies, LaToya donates a t-shirt that was her brother Michael’s, which she has kept with her since he died, and I am a little mortified to say I started crying.  It was touching and I thought she was lovely and generous.  I love Michael Jackson and good for her for including him in such a nice way.

At the men’s work space Meatloaf is missing his art supplies.  Meatloaf explodes and start going off on Busey in a profoundly disgusting way.  She is screaming profanity at Gary and looks as if he is about to have an aneurism.  Poor Gary is just looking at him calmly, not understanding what is happening.

Meatloaf is a big baby, saying Busey stole his stuff, and he is dumping all his pent up anger at poor Gary who is behaving like a perfect gentleman and even after Meatloaf goes crazy, Busey goes up to see if he’s okay.  The thing is, John Rich finds Meatloaf’s bag in the corner proving Busey did nothing.

There is no apology, there is no embarrassment that he was just a complete moron and ass.  He just shakes it off, says he was pushed too far and poor Gary is left not understanding, no support from the other guys, and no acknowledgment that he did nothing wrong.  I have decided I love Gary Busey.

NeNe Leakes is the best character to ever come out of reality television.  This chick is hilarious.  She is uncensored and fabulous.  She is not intimidated by any of the “celebrities” and holds her own.  I want to be friends with NeNe.  God help me if I ever piss her off, but still, I would love to hang out with her.

Busey is painting a buffalo, Lil Jon is doing blood-splattered artwork, Hatch is useless, and John Rich is a superstar.  I like country music and I like her people.  I think the country music industry is the heart of America and he is doing a good job being a leader, a role model, and a good old boy.  I like country music.  Even the truck broke, dog died, ran out of beer stuff.

Sidebar:  Donald Trump’s kid’s look just like him.  Those are some powerful genetics.  No paternity tests will ever be needed because regardless of whom the mother is, and his kids have 3 different moms, they all look the same.  I wonder if the younger Trumps will sport the hairdo when they are older.

The men have arrived at their gallery with time to spare.  They are set up, ready to go, and relaxing having a bite to eat, killing time until the gallery opening.  John Rich has called in the troops from Nashville and it’s awesome.  I love how his friends are rallying around the cause.  The cowboys have arrived.

Back with the ladies, they waited until the last minute to leave the workspace and are stuck in traffic. The men go to spy on the ladies gallery and see they have not yet arrived.  Mark McGrath and Lil Jon pull out a phone and do an episode of MTV Cribs.  Who knew hat Lil Jon was so entertaining?

The women are in gridlock and Star Jones uses that at a reason for point a finger at Marlee and comment on how unorganized she is.  Bitch.  Back with the men, Meatloaf is crying, apologizing to Gary for his outburst.  He feels horrible about his behavior and it’s touching.  More touching is Gary’s response.

Gary Busey is an evolved human being.  I seriously think this man is delicious.  He is calm and kind and after his explosion, Meatloaf informs us that he has been to anger management classes.  Really?  You might want to get your money back Sweetie because it didn’t quite catch.  Busey 1 – Meatloaf – 0.

The ladies arrive with 30 minutes to spare and no art has been hung.  It looks like a garage sale in comparison to the men who have a real gallery.  The schmoozing and selling begins and the money starts to roll in.  Everyone is bringing in the money, except for Richard Hatch.  Again, he’s useless.

The men are jamming, the women have no visitors, but then she arrives.  Jill Zarin turns up with her husband Bobby and like magic, it turns around and the money starts rolling in for the women.  I love Jill Zarin and don’t care what the crazy Bethenny loving fanatics think.  Jill is fabulous, looks great, and I dig her.

A little boy named Colin, who is a patient at St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, which is the charity for John Rich, arrives and it’s lovely.  He is a precious little boy and you snap out of the madness for a minute to see how important this silly show is.  Bless them all for raising so much money.

Sitting through 2 hours of Celebrity Apprentice is worth it for 30 seconds of NeNe Leakes talking about Star Jones.  John Rich sells his guitar for $470,000.00 and his reaction to the money made me cry.  What is wrong with me?  I am now crying at Celebrity Apprentice?  Dear Lord help me.

In the boardroom Gary is again a gentleman and Meatloaf is a loser.  He still does not say that Gary did nothing, and none of the men have Gary’s back.  It’s a shame that they don’t stand up for Gary and the fact that he did nothing wrong.  Cowards.  The only person to stand up for Gary is Marlee.

La Toya Jackson wins $25k for Aids Project Los Angeles which is awesome.  The t-shirt she gave up sold for $99,000.00.  When she gave it to Marlee she said there were only 2 of them, but to Trump she says it was limited edition.  Either way, it raised a ton of money, and allowed Michael to be remembered.

Trump cuts a deal and says if both teams agree, because so much money was raised, both teams can keep whatever they made.  They agree.  The men raised a total of $626,908.00.  The women raised $986,000.00.  Trump gives her $14 of his own money and the women are at $1,000,000.00 for Marlee’s charity.

Her interpreter John is crying, I am crying, and it’s magic.  It’s so much money and so many people will be helped.  Marlee’s charity is the Starkey Hearing Foundation which provides hearing aids, free of charge, to third world countries so people can hear.  It’s remarkable and I am so happy for everyone.

Trump tells Marlee that since Jose left she can opt to have no-one fired on the men’s team, or she can have one of them go.  She consults with her team and they decide someone should be fired.  Bravo.  I love it that she says to fire because if she did not it would have been lame.  Get lost Richard Hatch.

It’s gross that when Trump pushes for who is the weakest link, the men sell Gary down the river.  Such a shame.  He is odd to be sure, but he is harmless, doing what is asked of him, and Hatch is a loser.  Why sell him out?  Why be mean?  Mr. all American country boy is, in the end, not that nice.

Hatch is fired.  Gary pulls Marlee aside and thanks her for having his back.  Next week NeNe takes on La Toya and you know that is going to be good.  This is a fun season and as the duds are eliminated, it gets better and better.  I don’t know who will win, and don’t care really, but I want NeNe at the end.

McGrath can go, Meatloaf must go, the Playboy chick is invisible, Star Jones is crazy, and Marlee Matlin could take it.  NeNe and Gary are stars, Lil Jon is fabulous, and John Rich could win.  It’s a fun ride, and I will watch till the end.  To La Toya, you are going to be eaten alive so start keeping the faith.

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