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July 12, 2010

A Cat Lady, Roman Polanski, Bethenny Frankel, The Bachelorette and JDate

http://www.jewishjournal.com/blog/item/a_cat_lady_roman_polanski_bethenny_frankel_the_bachelorette_and_jdate_20100/

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Our new baby, "Gopher"

-  My son got another cat this weekend.  That makes two, and it’s easier to deal with if I say they belong to my son. It’s always a difficult choice as a single woman to get a cat.  You get one, then two, and before you know it you’ve got a dozen and never leave your house.

The truth is that one cat is now a year old and the new one is three months.  My son will go off to college in 4 years and since he’s probably not schlepping these cats, it’s time for me to deal with the fact that I am single, and the owner of two cats.  Not one, but two. 

I am now putting myself out into the dating pool with feline baggage.  I’m not sure men believe me when I say they are my kid’s cats, because they know the cats will be here long after my boy heads off to university.  I am one embroidered cat sweater away from being a cat lady.

-  This morning Roman Polanski was set free by the Swiss government.  Media outlets are reporting it as “stunning” news.  Really?  It was 33 years ago, and no one really cares, particularly his victim, so why is it so important?  Roman Polanksi is a rapist and a child molester.  Okay. 

He knows it, we know it, and it’s over.  I think it’s a waste of money for our government to be trying to get this old man back, when there are kids dying overseas for the freedom of this country.  Spend the money to bring our soldiers home, not getting this guy back when the reason he left is because you screwed up.

-  I think that Bethenny Frankel’s fans are a little crazy.  By a little crazy of course I mean whack jobs.  At the pet store this weekend a woman decided she needed to school me on all things Bethenny.  I was told why she is so fabulous, and why I need to stop talking trash about her.

While I thought it was flattering she reads my blog, and though I’m sure under different circumstances she is lovely, this woman was insane.  She came up to me and started screaming that I need to leave Bethenny alone because I don’t even know her.

My first question was to ask if this woman knew her.  She responded that she did not, but still knew her better than I did.  Apparently, if you like Bethenny, then in some reality television parallel universe, you actually know her, and are her friend.

To this lovely lady, whom I assume is reading, I would advise you to not read my blog on Friday morning.  I was nice to Bethenny this week because she got married on her show, but it’s back to reality.  You’re BFF is ridiculous, and I imagine it will be quite clear after Thursday’s show.

I wonder if there are therapists who specialize in treating people who live in this parallel reality television universe.  People who think that just because they watch a show, they know the people, and are therefore friends.  If I were a therapist, this would be my specialty.

-  The Bachelorette is on tonight.  I have not been watching because I think Alli is disgusting, but tonight I’m tuning in, if only for a little while.  I like the guy from Cape Cod and am interested in seeing his family.  I hope Alli dumps him and he gets to be the new Bachelor.

He would be perfect.  He is just a regular guy, who is not gay, or dreaming of being an actor.  He might actually play the game fair and find love in the end.  He has a better shot at finding love than a poser like Jake, or a lying skank like Alli.  I really hope she dumps him.

I know the numbers for this season are big.  I wonder however if they realize it’s not because of her.  I think there are people watching who can’t stand Alli, and turn in each week to see which man is saved from her clutches, and which sucker is stuck with her for longer.

-  I had a JDate date this weekend.  Oh.  My. God.  I tried to write about it but could not manage to tell the story without it sounding made up.  It was probably my most horrible date ever.  In some ways, even worse than the guy that got drunk and puked on my shoes.

I like discussing religion and politics.  I think they are interesting subjects, I am not militant about either one of them, and I like to hear what other people think.  I find lively exchanges about these things to be educational, enlightening and entertaining.

I might have to change my mind however after this last date.  He had strong opinions about the government of both America and Israel.  He was militant, abrasive and rude.  When he actually started yelling at me for not agreeing with him, I thought I might be on a hidden camera show.

I don’t know how it was that his complete and total insanity was not apparent on the phone, but it wasn’t.  He was a nice Jewish guy, who invited me for a drink, and I went, not realizing he was a crazy person.  He needs to be in hospital for evaluation, not on JDate.

It’s been an interesting couple of weeks on JDate. I have met some fascinating people.  A couple of good guys, a couple of freaks, some well meaning men who were just not a match, and some truly phenomenal looking men who were just not that into me.

I’ve discovered that JDate is just like all the other sites in terms of the types of people you find.  Online dating is a crapshoot.  It requires a lot of time and dedication to be able to sort through the booty calls, and get to the men who are actually looking for a relationship.

The difference is that the majority of users are Jewish, and for me that is important.  I am learning to not blame JDate for my bad dates, but rather thank them for showing me what I don’t want, so when I come across my beshert, I will recognize him quickly.

There has got to be a guy out there who will embrace my cats, appreciate that our views on politics may not be the same, will watch The Bachelorette with me even when the season is built around an idiot, and does not think he is friends with Bethenny.

I had an interesting weekend.  I learned a lot about my son, my needs, my limitations, and my hopes.  The things I thought I once needed to be happy are not important anymore, because I am happy without them.  My life is blessed and things will come because I am keeping the faith.

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