Posted by Ilana Angel
I write a blog about looking for love. My heart has been broken. Rather than retreat to a life of loneliness and defeat, I wipe myself off and get back up, each time I fall.
I admittedly have a romanticized view of love. I believe in soul mates and happily ever after. There are few examples that I can refer to and say, I want what they have.
I can remember looking at John and Elizabeth Edwards and thinking that they were the fairytale. They were beautiful, successful and in love. They endured unimaginable heartbreak, and tremendous joy.
They were united and it was beautiful. His support of her through her illness was inspiring. During the heartache that I experienced, I took comfort in their marriage. It gave me hope.
That was then. Today, I think John Edwards is a Douche Lord and his wife should divorce him. His little girl, Quinn, should never give him the privilege of ever knowing her.
I am not going to hold back, and while I know I will get slammed for it, I don’t care. This guy is beyond disgusting. I get that people cheat on their spouses. I have been cheated on. It happens, and though it’s a deal breaker for me, it does not have to be for everyone.
When Elizabeth stayed with him after his infidelity I felt for her. I supported her decision. I’m not sure her staying with him would have been the outcome, if she were not sick, but whatever. She was not willing to give up a life with a man she loved for a mistake. Good for her.
He has been denying that he was the father of this little girl from the moment she was born. Put aside what he thinks about his wife or his whore. What does it say about him that he did not care about this child?
This little girl is going to grow up with a father who is a Douche Lord and a mother who is a whore. She slept with a man who she knew was married. She knew that not only was he married, his wife was ill. Her lack of respect for herself and Mrs. Edwards makes her a whore.
I feel horrible for Elizabeth and her children. I feel horrible for this little girl. I even feel a little bad for the whore that she got herself into this mess. Who I do not feel sorry for, is John Edwards.
He has embarrassed himself and his family. I hope the punishment is great. I pray that Elizabeth has the strength to survive this. Should she pass now, it will be yet another nail that he put into her coffin. How much more is this poor woman supposed to deal with?
God Bless this family. These are lives that are forever changed because of this pig. John Edwards is a Douche Lord and he better start praying. Do not waste your time praying for forgiveness John. Pray that you are travelling first class on the train to hell because that is where you are headed.
Life will go on for all of us. I pray that it will also go on for Elizabeth Edwards. I am sending her my prayers. Keep the faith Mrs. Edwards. Keep the faith.
**Follow Keeping the Faith on Twitter @ilanaangel
12.12.13 at 8:05 am | Well played my son. Well played.
12.11.13 at 6:58 am | I watch in awe and stare with envy at these. . .
12.5.13 at 3:16 pm | Heaven has received a blessing today.
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11.30.13 at 10:42 am | "The only correct actions are those that demand. . .
11.29.13 at 1:56 pm | My nest will never empty as my son will always be. . .
9.15.13 at 3:14 pm | I love you Russell Brand. (470)
12.11.13 at 6:58 am | I watch in awe and stare with envy at these. . . (267)
7.25.11 at 5:38 pm | We need more Jews! (245)
January 21, 2010 | 1:11 pm
Posted by Ilana Angel
Yesterday a reader named Tamar sent me the following comment: “It seems that your blog is less about being single in LA and more about reality TV. What happened to that? If I want a reality TV rundown I could go elsewhere.”
You are correct Tamar. The last couple of weeks have been more about television than my dating life. And yes, if you want to read about reality shows, you could totally look somewhere else. They won’t be nearly as entertaining as mine, but you are welcome to go take a look.
Here’s the thing, my current dating life sucks. It’s a drag. I’ve lost my energy in terms of getting all dolled up to have dinner with a stranger. Even my heartfelt desire to be in a relationship is being tested.
First, it is pouring rain and impossible for me to have cute hair. I either have to go with Jew fro, or slick it back in a bun. I could put on a hat, but it shades my face, and then he’ll think I’m trying to hide something.
I’ve had 2 dates in last couple of weeks and both were too pathetic to even write about. By pathetic of course I mean embarrassing. I honestly did not think it would be this hard to meet someone. I am fearless in terms of putting myself out there, but I just don’t have it in me at the moment.
Date one was with a man who was 42 and spent the entire date calling me a cougar. I am 8 months older than him. 8 months and I am a cougar! He told the waiter we were on our first date and I was a cougar. I wanted to smack him, but then he would have had me arrested for child abuse. I bailed. No second date.
Date two was with a man who was 55 and really lovely. We had a nice date and while there was an age difference, we had things in common and he was a gentleman. I enjoyed it. When I put my hand on his arm while talking, I realized he had old people skin. It was super soft and loose and I just couldn’t do it. I bailed. No second date.
How many horrible dates can I write about? Even I’m starting to feel sorry for myself. I’m much more comfortable with all of you feeling sorry for me. Do you have someone to set me up with Tamar? You could snap me out of my dating funk with one simple set up!
I went to a party last weekend for a friend’s birthday. (Happy Birthday Elaine! Great party.) Other than a couple of fabulous gay men, I think I was the only single woman there. I met some really fabulous couples, and it made me want to be part of a couple, yet lately I’ve done nothing to make it happen for me.
I am a dating machine. I date a lot. In fact, I date more than any of my single friends. I love men and I date to meet someone, so I decided to be proactive until I find him. The thing is, I’ve lost my mojo. Rather than date just for the sake of dating, I’m laying low and watching reality television.
I suffer, because it’s harder to get back on the horse when you wait too long. My readers suffer, because I am not regaling them with my dating antics. My Beshert suffers, because I am not searching for him, so he has to wait for me. It’s a big mess.
Your comment may have been just what I needed to kick me back into gear. Thanks Tamar. I am going to round up a date for this weekend. I need to get my fabulous self back out there. Enough is enough. You are a good reader!
I am having dinner with some girlfriends tonight so maybe I’ll hit on the waiter. I need some practice since I’ve been out of it for a while. Maybe I’ll start with the busboy or the valet guy, and work my way up to the waiter by dessert.
I’m not giving up on my reality television recaps though. Tonight is the season finale of Jersey Shore so you know I’ve got to say something! I will get back on track with my dating this weekend and all will be well again.
Thank you Tamar. Thanks to everyone who reads my blog. I am amazed every day by how many people read it. I appreciate you staying with my while I go through a dating slump. As for my getting back to the focused single dater that I truly am, just keep the faith!
January 20, 2010 | 12:53 pm
Posted by Ilana Angel
The season premier of Millionaire Matchmaker was on Bravo last night. I want to say, with my whole heart, that I think Patti Stanger is a crock. She is full of crap. I cannot believe she is managing to keep this show going. I am embarrassed for her. She is a horrible Jewish stereotype and makes me want to gauge my own eyes out.
Why would people pay money to this woman? In the two years her show has been on television, we have not seen a wedding. If your business is matchmaking then wouldn’t a wedding be the ultimate sign of success?
Patti opens the show saying her matchmaking ability has gotten her not only notches in heaven, but notches in life. Really? Since when does being a hypocrite get you notches on the belt of life? I can tell you Patti has not gotten notches for entrance into heaven. What she has is a series of notches on my bedpost, made with a bottle opener, for every time I watch her show and did not impale myself, just to make it stop.
The show used to state she had a 99% success rate. They have changed it to an “extremely high” success rate. I think the only extremely high thing here is the millionaire who buys into her scheme. Destin is the COO of her company. Don’t get it. Rachel is Destin’s fiancé, the Director of Registration, and the mother of their son. Who is called Sin. Don’t get it. Chelsea is the VP of Matchmaking. Don’t get it.
Patti refers to Chelsea as the main matchmaker, yet says it’s her God given talent and intuition that makes her successful. Has she managed to transfer her God given talent to Chelsea? What is that smell? It’s crap.
This week she sets up two twenty something guys who are clearly not looking for love but rather TV time. She goes to meet with them and she is full of herself. She tries to be funny and she’s just not. They do a “casting” session for women to meet the millionaires and she complains that they are all ugly. Maybe all the hot chicks watched the show and realized they’d have to be complete morons to be a part of it.
Patti says “no gold diggers” are allowed in her club. Really? They are there to meet millionaires and they are not gold diggers. This chick is seriously stupid. She yells at a client that he is not going to make her look like an idiot. Oh Sweetie, you did that all by yourself.
The millionaires meet the “ladies” and one asks a chick if she likes to travel, and where she’s been out of the country. Her response is that she has never been outside of the country but went to Jamaica and Mexico. Are they now part of the US?
I know that some of you are saying I do not know her and am basing my opinion on a “reality” television show. The fact is, I have met her. I approached her at a party with a friend of mine and she was a complete and total &^%$#. She is not a nice person. My friends and I have had more success setting up our friends with each other, than I bet she has in her scam matchmaking business. All her show does is make me feel sad for Heidi Fleiss. Poor Heidi was ruined for doing the same thing that Patti does.
I cannot explain why I am so annoyed by this woman. I suppose that at the end of the day, I just think she is bad for women. Her advice is idiotic and her made up vocabulary is ridiculous. To all the millionaires who are giving her money, you’re better off giving your cash to the people of Haiti, and finding love on your own. To the people who watch her show and hear her blanket statements about the women of Los Angeles, she is wrong.
Last year Patti said she was not the marrying kind. She is now planning her wedding on her show. It took her boyfriend 5 years to ask her to marry him. He only asked her after she found success on television. Coincidence? Perhaps Patti was not the marrying kind because no one was asking her.
Single people managed to find love and get married long before Patti Stanger came along and will continue to do so long after her 15 minutes are up. To the millionaires who have thrown their money, it’s okay. Love will find you. Just keep the faith.
*You can follow my blog on Twitter @ilanaangel
January 19, 2010 | 3:14 pm
Posted by Ilana Angel
Last night’s show started off with the first one-on-one date going to my favorite tranny, Vienna. I am really starting to dig this girl. On one hand she is tough as nails, yet her feelings get hurt when someone does not like her. She is young and trying to find her own path, so we need to cut her some slack. It’s so brave to go on a show like this pre-op. God Bless her.
Jake takes Vienna on a helicopter ride and the destination is bungee jumping. He is on the bridge, ready to jump, gets scared, and says he is afraid of heights. Really? He’s a pilot. He can cruise at 35,000 feet but the top of a bridge freaks him out? I don’t want a pilot flying me to have this fear. I’m just saying.
They are about to jump, Jake is about to cry and back out, when Vienna kicks into protective mode. She is so supportive I just fell in love with her. She is cute and strong. I think there is hope for her. She is too young for him, but somehow I get it. I hope she can have her surgery completed before the wedding.
Jake is awkward with her and tells us there is a good chemistry, but clarifies that it’s emotional chemistry. Their kisses are weird but it’s almost charming. It allows them to build on something other than sexual chemistry, which is a good thing. When says she is on “cloud Jake” was cute.
Vienna is back at the house and the claws in Crazytown are coming out. Ali, the Sleeping Beauty look-a-like who was so sweet in the beginning, is now horrible. Really a bitchy, mean girl and I don’t like her. Is that harsh? No? Okay, she is a skank and I don’t trust her.
Everyone is jealous of Vienna, but what is so strange is that they are are oddly supportive of each other. How is that possible? It’s a competition people and you should all hate each other, but only hate her. Hands off my tranny friend. Vienna is telling them about her date, and it’s sweet, but they don’t get it. Crazytown is rapidly becoming Bitchville.
Now we are on a group date with Jon Lovitz at his comedy club. Jake is back doing the thing where he talks like everything is his idea. Like Jon is his friend, and he arranged the whole thing. It’s my biggest pet peeve about this show. It’s actually my only pet peeve. Jake has nothing to do with any of the planning. He met Jon at the same time as these chicks. He needs to stop.
They are going to do stand up and Ashleigh is crying because she is scared. First, if this chick if 25 then I am a natural blond and weigh 120 lbs. She is in her 30’s and she is a freak, immature and pathetic. Roz was an idiot to mess around with a staffer. She should have waited a week and had a shot at Jon Lovitz. Is he single? He is Jewish, and can stand by himself to pee, which is about all that is required at this point in my dating life. Slim pickings people.
All the girls are doing a stand up routine, and my eyes are bleeding, but I can’t stop watching. Ali refers to herself as “elementary”, which is the smartest thing she has said since we met her. Jessie is forgettable, Tenly puts her legs behind her head, Elizabeth goes blue, Kathryn steals a horrible kiss, Cory impersonates all the girls. and all the while Michelle is losing her mind.
Michelle talks about her first kiss. I imagine her head starting to spin around as she spews puke. She talks about how much she loves him. It is mortifying. I would watch surveillance tape of this chick in her padded room. She is creepy. Her stand up is painful. I’m not a doctor, but this chick needs medical attention.
After the comedy club, the group date goes for a drink. Tenly pulls Jake aside and finally tells him she is divorced. She mentions her husband left her, she was a virgin when she got married, and has not been with anyone since. I kept waiting for her to recite scripture and how this was what Jesus wanted for her. She has got to go.
Ashleigh goes off with Jake and talks about how much everyone hates Vienna. She was petty and disgusting. Jake listened, but then said he felt bad because Vienna was not there to defend herself. It’s those types of things, that make me love Jake.
Back at the house, Gia is lecturing Vienna about how horrible she is, and makes her cry. Poor thing. She is wearing no make up, and looks like a little boy, which she is, and I feel sad for her. They are being mean, and calling her dangerous. It’s ridiculous. They hate her because she has balls. Literally and figuratively.
Mean girl Ali sits with Jake, and is worried because they have not seen each other since their date. She is a loser and I want her gone. She dumps all over Vienna, and that is all going to come back to hit her in the face. They are so sure Vienna will show her true colors, but in the meantime, they are all showing theirs.
Michelle is now cracking before our eyes. She is crying, talking about how she is looking for love, and no one else is on the same level. She is telling Jake how she really, really, really, really, really wants a husband. She asks for a kiss, then explains that it’s to see if she feels anything. He kisses her and it’s a disaster. By disaster, of course I mean great television.
She then pulls the oldest and dumbest power play ever in the history of dating. She tells him she can’t stay, but will, if he wants her to. He tells her to go. BAM! Then she says she can’t believe he is doing this to her. Oh. My. God. I love this show. I am sad to see Crazy go. Her last words to us are, “I want to marry him, but he is not the man for me”. She is a bi-polar mess.
Jake is talking to the group date ladies. He is exhausted, emotionally drained, and has decided to go home and not give out a rose. I thought it was charming for a second, but then decided it was cowardly. He should have given the rose out, then left. They are all talking about how much integrity he has. No one is pissed they didn’t get the rose. Not buying it.
One-on-one date number two goes to single mom Ella. They take off in a helicopter and Vienna is left at home with the madness. She apologizes to everyone if she has hurt any feelings. Ali jumps all over her again. I need Ali to go home. She is Satan and karma is going to get her. Thank goodness when it happens, we will all be able to see it from the comfort of our couches.
Ella and Jake are at Sea World. He gives her a birthday present and it’s a visit with her son Ethan. The kid runs up to his mom and she didn’t even cry. She hugs him, with one arm, and says what are you doing here? It was the most unemotional reaction. It was as if they had been together at breakfast. I thought it was weird.
It got stranger when she watched Jake with Ethan. That is when she cried. Granted Jake was amazing with the boy. Really lovely and kind. As a single mother it warmed my heart to see him with the child. But she only cried when she talked about what a great dad he would be. She was more emotional about finding a dad for her kid that seeing her kid. I’m done with Ella.
We’re back in Crazytown and Elizabeth goes off for a chat with Jake. It is hard to tell who is crazier, Michelle or Elizabeth. These two chicks need to have their own show. Her “don’t kiss me approach” blows up in her face. Vienna comes over and interrupts their time. She is pissed because she thinks Vienna ruined it, but it was already decided sister. You are a loon.
Elizabeth said, “I am not vanilla. I am all the colors of the rainbow”. Since when is vanilla a color in the rainbow? I am still laughing about that line. She is, “not a fish in a pond waiting for a hook”. Really? Don’t fish avoid hooks in a pond? She may be the dumbest girl there. She flip flops on everything she says and in the end she is out.
At the rose ceremony, Jessie has quite simply the ugliest hair on television. Elizabeth is gone, as is Valishia the “homemaker”. Valishia cries and says she is used to things not going her way and it is something she lives with everyday. As she is crying I want to slap her. We are down to 9.
The only thing that could possibly make this show any better is if The Situation from Jersey Shore is the next Bachelor. That would be the greatest casting in reality television history. Even though it’s a long shot, I’m going to cross my fingers and keep the faith.
January 18, 2010 | 12:20 pm
Posted by Ilana Angel
Jersey Shore is a phenomenon. Not only do we all watch it, don’t lie, you watch it, but we can watch the same episode over and over again. It just does not get old and when I thought it could not get any better, the shore has gone Jewish.
I was happy to see promos about “the Israeli chick”. I’m thinking one of the guidos is going to fall in love with a Jew, and she will be awesome. Then we meet Danielle. For the 20 giants steps forward that Bar Refaeli took the image of Israeli women, Danielle just shot us back 100 steps.
Pauly is one of the show regulars and he is hilarious. His life revolves around going to the gym, tanning, doing laundry and scoring chicks. He spends 25 minutes doing his hair everyday, and sometimes it’s 2 or 3 times a day. Interesting note: his hair looks ridiculous.
So Pauly meets Israeli Danielle. She is not particularly attractive but cute enough to get hit on at the Jersey shore. She tells him she loves being Jewish and he should come to the Holy Land to which he responds, “I will get beat up there. I’m Catholic dude.”
He tells the camera that he does not know anything about Israel or “that” religion and all he cares about is “getting to the business” with Danielle. He tells her they should go to his room and she tells him they can’t have sex until they get married.
He complains it’s going to be impossible to hook up with her, but he loves a challenge. If he can hook up with her it will be his accomplishment for the summer. He says this after he tells us that she is annoying and he doesn’t even really like her.
If I were 20 years younger, really stupid, had no self-esteem and a serious drinking problem, I would totally go to the shore this summer to score me a guido. It is so romantic.
Danielle makes out with Pauly for a minute and then leaves. He met her, she wouldn’t put out, she bails, he moves on. Done. Israel gets a 2 minute mention and it’s over. Just as well. Danielle seems a little off so it’s good she’s gone and won’t be embarrassing the tribe.
Then Pauly is out on the boardwalk with a trio of girls and out of nowhere Danielle comes up to him. She seriously came out of nowhere and just appears. Houston we have a problem. How do you say stalker in Hebrew?
She asks him what he’s doing later, he says nothing, she says let’s hang, he tells her he’ll call when he gets home. She leaves. He’s freaked out but continues with his friends. Cut to a few minutes later when he is at the tattoo parlor and hears his name being called. Guess who?
She has purchased him a t-shirt that says I Heart Jewish Girls, and lets him know she added the Star of David. That would be cute, except for the fact that it means she either keeps fabric paint in her purse, or, bought the shirt, drove around looking for a fabric store, got paint, made the star, let it dry, then gave it to him. How do you say creepy in Hebrew?
So he gets the shirt, let’s the camera know he will never wear it, and tells her again, he will call her when he gets home. She tells him not to be a #&@% and call her because she will not call him. Okay. He tells her he will. She kisses him and leaves with a totally pissed attitude.
Pauly goes on with his business and decides to go on a ride on the boardwalk. He gets off the ride and there is Danielle. She is full on stalking now and totally passive aggressive. The girls he is hanging out with are now scared of her, and blow off Pauly so he heads home.
Remember, Danielle told Pauly that she will never call him. It is his job to call her and she is NOT calling. So Pauly is now home and the phone rings. He does not want to answer because he thinks it’s Danielle, so a roommate answers and surprise, surprise it’s the Israeli.
She calls every 5 minutes for the next hour. Pauly has determined she is crazy and will teach her a lesson. He said he would call, she freaked out when he didn’t, he takes the phone off the hook and lets her stew. Are you following? How do you say train wreck in Hebrew?
It’s now morning and the entire house is talking about the stalker. Everyone agrees the Israeli is conductor of the A-train to Looneyville. The phone rings, the background music starts, we all know who it is. Mike answers, gets Pauly and tells him to wait so he can make popcorn. The roommates get comfy and listen in to the show.
This is my favorite part. Everyone is listening and Danielle goes from being a weird stalker to a total embarrassment. She tells Pauly there is one thing he needs to know about her and it’s that she does not like to be played. Really? That’s the ONE thing we need to know about you Danielle? How do you say delusional in Hebrew?
She is rambling on about how she feels stupid for how HE is acting, and he keeps asking if it’s his turn to speak. She is screaming about how she is not stupid. She tells him it’s his turn to talk, and as he is talking, she keeps talking. He is talking over, her telling her it’s his turn, but she won’t shut up. It is comedy gold.
Pauly is talking calmly when he tells her she is a crazy stalker and should have just trusted him. She loses it, screams she is not crazy, or a stalker, and she will not be made to look stupid. It’s a little late for that. She has pulled off a miracle. She managed to make Pauly look like a great guy. Which seemed impossible for the first 8 episodes of Jersey Shore.
She is still talking, explaining again how she is not a loon, and he hangs up on her. He then informs us all that Danielle is not looking for a hook up, she is looking for a husband. Can you imagine the nerve of this guy? A nice Jewish girl looking for a husband? Unheard of.
Thursday will be the season finale of this train wreck. I am sad to see them go and hope they come back with a whole new group of freaks. Here’s an idea MTV, do a show called “Beaches of Eilat” and get a group of 8 hot Israelis to hang out in a house and send a guido there on holiday.
I love this show. It’s the most entertaining hour of non-entertaining entertainment ever. As for it coming back for a second season, I’m going to keep the faith.
**You can follow me on Twitter @ilanaangel
January 15, 2010 | 12:08 pm
Posted by Ilana Angel
This weekend my son will turn 14. I remember the day he was born like it was yesterday, yet I barely remember things that happened before he came. It’s strange. I can recall details of his life, but my childhood has faded. I suppose that’s normal when you have kids. My memories are marked in terms of his life. He is pure sunshine and my life got infinitely better when I had this child. I am blessed to be his mother, and proud to call him friend.
When he was two, he tried to stick something in a wall socket. I raced over and slapped his hand. He got scared and cried. I remember it vividly. To this day, if he gets in trouble, he’ll say: “remember when you hit me?” It cracks us up every time. When he was little he’d say he wanted to marry me when he grew up. I remember the day he stopped wanting to marry me, and changed it to he wanting to marry someone just like me. He was growing up.
He tells me I’m beautiful, thinks I’m funny, does his chores and is a wonderful student. He is a loyal friend, compassionate and tolerant. He appreciates that his life is blessed, supports the underdog and is hilarious. He is giving an Aliyah tomorrow to mark the 1 year anniversary of his Bar Mitzvah. He is not Jewish just because he was simply born into it. He is Jewish because he has chosen it and I am very proud of that.
This weekend I will have ten 14 year old boys sleeping over. They will watch movies and wrestling. They will eat every single crumb of food in my home. They will stay up way too late killing Nazis and having video game challenges. I will be holed up in my room listening to them talk and laugh. They are a remarkable group of young men and always make me laugh. Talking to them teaches me something new and makes me look at things in a different way.
I always wanted to be a mother. When I was a little girl it was my dream. I had my son when I was 30 and in all those years of wanting to be a mother, I never imagined it would be this great or this hard. My own mother had 4 kids by the time she was 26. I marvel at how hard it must have been. With each moment that I love my child I think about my mother and how much she loved all of us. It makes me love her even more.
I guess all I really wanted to say today was that I love my son. This weekend he will become a full-fledged teenager, preparing for high school and a blink away from getting his driver’s license. The time is flying by. I welcome everyday with a full heart. I watch him and see my life is glorious. I don’t worry that as he ages, so do I. I am excited for him to grow up and feel fortunate that I get a front row seat to his life.
I look forward to his driving lessons, high school applications, and first job. I can’t wait to dance at his wedding and spoil his children. With each of those milestones I will be older and for a lot of them I will be just plain old. Wish me well this weekend! Say a prayer for my neighbors as they are going to suffer through the party with me. The next four days are jam packed with activities and celebrations and I can’t wait. Happy Birthday to my boy!
Shabbat Shalom. This weekend, when I can barely stand all the noise, and want to vacuum while they sleep because there is food all over the floor, I will count my blessings and keep the faith.
January 14, 2010 | 1:04 pm
Posted by Ilana Angel
Just when I thought my dating life could not get any worse, they unveiled a new sex robot in Vegas over the weekend. Really? It’s bad enough that I need to compete with young girls, but now I have to also get in line with a robot?
Roxxxy is being touted as the first life sized robotic girlfriend. She is even programmed with artificial intelligence, which makes her exactly like most of the girls in their 20’s who are trying to date men in my age group.
Roxxxy was created by True Companion and is apparently way more than just your regular old blow up doll. I am not surprised that this company is based in New Jersey. I’m thinking the guys of Jersey Shore are already trying to get one.
She talks and looks “real” so if you like a plastic looking girl with a perfect body, then you will love her. If that kind of girl is your thing, you should move to Los Angeles. We’ve got a ton of them and you can probably find one for less than Roxxy’s ticket price of between $7000.00 and $9000.00.
You can actually have a conversation with Roxxxy. Her answers are pre-recorded and she hooks up to your laptop. She can be programmed to say your name, know your likes and dislikes, and can carry on a conversation. She will tell you that she loves you and can detect touch.
Are you kidding me? If she can do all that, and you can turn off the talking whenever you want, then they may have actually created the perfect woman. You get a Barbie that you can make stop talking which is the total dream girl.
I read that you can make her snore so at night it feels like there is someone real with you. She is 5’7” and weighs 120lbs. I want you to know that nobody really has a body like that. By nobody, of course I mean only about a million women in Los Angeles, but whatever.
True Companion says you can custom order Roxxxy to have any hair color, skin color or boob size you like. This chick is seriously a custom ordered Californian girl straight from the heart of New Jersey. Only in America people.
She is a toy. She is a cruel and unfair toy, that was developed to make the dating life of women unbearable, and that is just mean. The only possible way to make the creation of this horrible woman acceptable, is to now develop a male version. Are you listening to me True Companion?
That is the ONLY way to make this fair. If I may, I would like to customize mine to be 6’2”, have a bum you can pop a quarter off of, a 6 pack stomach, he can recite the Brucha over Shabbat dinner and does not snore.
Roxxxy could actually be a good thing if she were used in the proper way. For example, JDate could order 10,000, I will give them the names of 10,000 men that never should have been allowed on their site because they are unfit to date decent women, and they can give them a Roxxxy in exchange for never signing up again.
I wish Roxxxy all the best and by best of course I mean I hope she malfunctions, speaks in gibberish, and her “skin” falls off when touched. At least until I meet the man of my dreams, then all her malfunctions can be repaired and she can go on with her “life”.
Roxxxy is yet another bump in the road on the journey to love. Don’t worry girls, until she can cook dinner, clean a house or have children, she is not competition, as much as she is just annoying and offensive.
Technology is amazing. We must all welcome the future, but just remember, when you are embracing your technology, be careful to not get shocked and remember to keep the faith.
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January 13, 2010 | 11:32 am
Posted by Ilana Angel
I cannot believe that Rozlyn Papa is making the rounds on every gossip and entertainment show that will have her and calling foul. It is fascinating that so many people care. I mean I totally care but I’m just surprised that so many other people do too.
I happen to think she is a lying skank but that is just my opinion and you are welcome to disagree. She was there to be famous and she is cashing in on her 15 minutes of fame. I’ve got $20 that says they put her in The Bachelor Pad and she hooks up there.
She is on television talking about how mortified she is that she is being painted in a bad light and what will her young son think of her. If she were worried about what her son thought she would not have pranced around in a bathing suit kissing a man that had just kissed a bunch of other girls and said she wanted to bite him. If your son thinks you’re a skank Rozlyn it’s because that is what you portrayed yourself as.
One could argue that there may be some truth to what she is saying because it was discovered after she was booted that she had some arrests when she was young and it was not discovered by the show so they knew and schemed the whole thing to blow up for ratings. Those who argue that are stupid.
Why would Mike Fleiss risk his credibility on a skank? Why would he use his #1 show to hurt some stranger? Why would he tell her she could not talk about her son when Ella is on there talking about Ethan every two seconds? It’s all a little fishy to me and by fishy of course I mean skanky.
I think Rozlyn is an opportunist who used The Bachelor as her casting couch and she is delusional if she thinks she was singled out to boost ratings by manipulating her situation. I think she should marry The Situation and go live happily ever after on The Jersey Shore.
Wait. That was mean. Mike is way too classy for Roslyn, she should go be a housewife in New Jersey and be best friends with Danielle. Oh man! Even Danielle is too classy for Rozlyn. She should get a condo with Carrie Prejean where they can share make up and clothes and try to out-skank each other.
I’m not buying her sob story. Not even for a minute. I hope she enjoys a couple days of television notoriety because come next Monday one of the ladies of Crazytown will do something fabulous and she will be bumped to the “Who cares about you” aisle of past Bachelor contestants where she belongs.
I am not surprised at the lengths that people will go to become famous. We live in a time when you can go on a reality television show and expose yourself in a way that will guarantee interest. I get it and bravo to the brave ones who are able to do it. I love reality television so it’s all good for me.
I am surprised however when a woman is willing to sell her soul to the devil for 15 minutes of fame and then call foul in terms of her kid. Roslyn knew exactly what she was doing and in the end she hurt son and nothing is worth that to me.
Rozlyn needs to sleep with one eye open because karma tends to sneak up on you when you least expect it. As for The Bachelor, you’re good to be rid of her Jake. Not to worry as there are plenty more crazies to choose from. And as for Rozlyn’s son, not to worry sweetie pie, by the time you are old enough to understand what your mother did no one will remember who she was.
Monday night at 8 cannot come quick enough and I will be in front of my television watching, laughing, and cringing. To Rozlyn my advice would be to just stop talking because you are making it worse and when it all dies down and your 15 are over, remember to keep the faith.
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