November 8, 2011 | 12:50 am

What is Wrong With Brett Ratner? - UPDATED

Posted by Ilana Angel

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Brett Ratner

Brett Ratner has all the qualities in a man that should make a woman run in the other direction.  According to several reports, including here at The Jewish Journal, he has a massive ego, a small penis, and no respect for women.  He also likes to throw out gay slurs.  He is a Jew, so maybe the tribe will be spared ignorance from a man who is equal parts putz and genius.

This week, at a screening of his film The Heist in Hollywood, he used an offensive word when talking about the making of his movie.  It was stupid, thoughtless, careless, ignorant, and unacceptable.  There is simply no excuse for this behavior and the only thing lamer than what he said, was his apology. It reeked of insincerity, and he is clearly not an actor for a reason.

On his saying, “rehearsal is for fags”, Ratner apologized with, “I apologize for any offense my remarks caused. It was a dumb way of expressing myself. Everyone who knows me knows that I don’t have a prejudiced bone in my body. But as a storyteller I should have been much more thoughtful about the power of language and my choice of words.”

In what should be a great time for Brett, things seem to be crumbling a little bit.  In addition to unacceptable language, he also confessed to being a chapter in Olivia Munn’s book as the unnamed director with the “undersized manhood”.  He managed to acknowledge it was him, yet put the blame on her.  She was scorned and bitter, so she made something up.

Brett Ratner is a bit of a schmuck, and at 5’8”, a little on the short side.  He has a reputation of being rude, obnoxious and narcissistic. The thing is, I think he is great looking, and enough of a good guy that he qualifies as one of the bad boys that women think they can fix.  If only he loved me he would never say anything dumb, respect me, and all women. You know the type.

Ratner is his own worst enemy. He is talented and adorable, but keeps putting his feet in his mouth.  He is not invincible, and needs a reality check if he thinks saying sorry will make it all better.  He might want to Google “Mel Gibson” so he can see how quickly one can go from top to bottom with just a few words.  Being Brett Ratner is not that big of a deal.

I don’t care about who he has slept with, and have no interest in the size of his penis.  I think Brett Ratner is a talented director and deep down probably a great guy.  With so much to lose, I hope he can learn from this unfortunate week and get himself together.  Maybe start with a large donation to GLAAD, and a real apology to Olivia Munn.

If I were younger I would want to date Brett Ratner.  At this point I just want to make him a home cooked meal and lecture him about the fact that he is a role model to a lot of kids, and he needs to knock it off and think about someone other than himself.  I wish Mr. Ratner good luck, and hope this is a stumble not a fall.  My advice to Brett?  Stop talking, and keep the faith.

UPDATE:  Mr. Ratner resigned as producer of the Oscars today.  I feel sad for him that this has happened, but respect both his choice to step down, and his letter.  He is a good guy, a bad boy, and I think I may be in love with him.  See his letter below.

Dear Colleagues,

Over the last few days, I’ve gotten a well-deserved earful from many of the people I admire most in this industry expressing their outrage and disappointment over the hurtful and stupid things I said in a number of recent media appearances. To them, and to everyone I’ve hurt and offended, I’d like to apologize publicly and unreservedly.

As difficult as the last few days have been for me, they cannot compare to the experience of any young man or woman who has been the target of offensive slurs or derogatory comments. And they pale in comparison to what any gay, lesbian, or transgender individual must deal with as they confront the many inequalities that continue to plague our world.

So many artists and craftspeople in our business are members of the LGBT community, and it pains me deeply that I may have hurt them. I should have known this all along, but at least I know it now: words do matter. Having love in your heart doesn’t count for much if what comes out of your mouth is ugly and bigoted. With this in mind, and to all those who understandably feel that apologies are not enough, please know that I will be taking real action over the coming weeks and months in an effort to do everything I can both professionally and personally to help stamp out the kind of thoughtless bigotry I’ve so foolishly perpetuated.

As a first step, I called Tom Sherak this morning and resigned as a producer of the 84th Academy Awards telecast. Being asked to help put on the Oscar show was the proudest moment of my career. But as painful as this may be for me, it would be worse if my association with the show were to be a distraction from the Academy and the high ideals it represents.

I am grateful to GLAAD for engaging me in a dialogue about what we can do together to increase awareness of the important and troubling issues this episode has raised and I look forward to working with them. I am incredibly lucky to have a career in this business that I love with all of my heart and to be able to work alongside so many of my heroes. I deeply regret my actions and I am determined to learn from this experience.

Sincerely, Brett Ratner