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Jewish Journal

Toronto Maple Leafs

by Ilana Angel

October 11, 2009 | 1:51 pm

I love hockey.  I think it is the greatest sport in the world to watch and those who play are superior athletes.  It’s fast and exciting and if you’re really lucky there is a great fight.  Like we say in Canada, if there isn’t any blood its just figure skating.

This has nothing to do with being single I just wanted to make it clear to my friend Adam that the Toronto Maple Leafs are going to win the Stanley Cup again in my lifetime and by win it of course I mean a few times.  If Chicago can break their World Series curse then we’ve got it in the bag.  It will happen Adam and when it does I hope we win against Pittsburgh. xoxo

Now, on to the joys of being single and by joys of course I mean there is no joy in dating and by dating of course I mean spending time getting totally cute only to be stuck with someone who is as entertaining as a root canal.

My friend Elissa wanted to talk about the angst of pursuing the unattainable and posed the question why do women want what we can’t have in terms of men?  What I have learned my darling friend, and by learned I mean the hard way, is that if we want someone we can’t have they are probably not what we really want. 

I have faith that when I meet the man I am supposed to be with it will make sense and it will not be about wanting something I can’t have but more about getting something that I deserve.

Perhaps we choose men that are unattainable because we are really not ready for love and know inside it will not work so we are protecting ourselves.  I’ve done it myself more times that I care to remember.  If you like someone and those feelings cause you angst then he is simply not the right man.

As for being too shy to pursue someone, you have got to let that go.  I am a firm believer that it is okay for a woman to make the first move.  We are responsible for our own happiness and if you see someone you like then let them know.  With risk can come great reward.

There are no rules in the game of love.  You owe it to yourself to pursue all opportunities for happiness.  Be brave and bold and go for what you want.  There will always be rejection and perhaps embarrassment along the way but the best part is that when it’s the right one it will be glorious and you will be so glad you were confident.

I’m not a dating expert or a therapist but I am a woman who has been dating for a long time.  A pathetic admission but whatever.  I’ve had my share of love and heartache and each failed relationship gets me closer to my Beshert.  Perhaps it’s a little naïve and romantic but in the end all I have are my dreams. 

I will find him and if having these romanticized views of love gives me the strength to keep dating and searching then it’s all good.  Sometimes you’ve got to believe in the dream in order to keep the faith.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

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Ilana Angel writes two blogs for JewishJournal.com. KEEPING THE FAITH is about her worldview as a single Jewish mother, and KEEPING IT REAL is all about reality television....

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