January 5, 2010 | 2:22 pm

The Bachelor

Posted by Ilana Angel

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After months of waiting The Bachelor premiered last night on ABC.  I love this show and the hopeless romantic in me watches with an open heart and held breath that it will end in a happy ending.  The cynical girl who lives just below the surface of my heart watches to see the train wrecks so she can say I told you so. 

When Jake was walking around in his uniform with “On the Wings of Love” playing as the background music I could actually feel my heart flutter.  It was great television and I was hooked within the first 5 minutes.  The pilot gig is sexy and the uniform is delicious. Chris Harrison was, as always, a great host.  Ryan who?

I was not a fan of Jake last year.  He was a little boring and white toast for me but I’m a hardcore Jew lover so it makes sense I wouldn’t fall in love with him.  The thing is, I really like him.  He is lovely and kind and appears to really be looking for love.  He has a Tom Cruise vibe and that could be both good and bad I suppose, but for me it’s all good.

I will go on record right now that my favorite girl after episode one is Tenley.  I just loved her.  She went in for the first kiss and I thought it was charming.  That she put herself out there after being with only one other person was huge.  I remember the first time I kissed a man after my divorce.  I burst into tears.  It was a very emotional thing and I felt both her fear and her bravery.  Her divorce could be a turn off for Jake so we’ll see.

Vienna may be a transvestite and Michelle could possibly make perfect television.  Even if you hate this show, Michelle makes it worth watching.  She cried on episode one and you know that’s going to be just the beginning of crazy time.  Elizabeth from Nebraska is stunning but has a hidden mean girl side so she may be a bonus train wreck.  Ella, the single mom, is a loon.  She is a hairdresser who had the most unattractive hair. I can tell she is going to crack.  Can’t wait!

Some of these girls are beyond beautiful.  I think Gia is so pretty that I can’t wrap my head around her being unlucky in love.  Granted she has no personality and appears to not be that smart, but what I wouldn’t give to be in that body for a week. I’d get bored eventually so I guess that’s ultimately her problem with men but one week would be fantastic.

Ali with the sore throat is cute in a Sleeping Beauty kind of way and I think she will be around for a while.  Valishia from Carlsbad listed her job as “Homemaker”.  What does that mean?  She had the best dress of the night which was the only memorable thing about her.  Then there is Channy, who is also a tranny, and he/she had the most mockable moment with her landing strip comment.

When the girls were all surprised that they did not get the first impression rose it was hilarious.  They seriously all thought it would be them.  It made me wish my full time job was to write about this show, which reminds me….. Steve McPherson?  Hello?  Are you ignoring me?  Call Mike Fleiss and he will tell you there is no point.  Just call and get it over with.  I’m waiting.

It is going to be a great season.  At the end of the day whether you like Jake or not, it is worth watching because the women will be entertaining.  For me, the train wrecks are fabulous and the cattiness of the girls is fascinating but the real reason I will tune in each week is for the opportunity to watch two people fall in love.

I believe in love.  I hope Jake finds what he is looking for and that the girl he picks is his Beshert and not a wannabe celebrity like Melissa Rycroft.  Don’t even get me started on her. I am thrilled for Jason and Molly and I wish them all the best with their upcoming wedding.  He dodged a bullet on that one.

I will blog about The Bachelor on Tuesdays and I’m very excited because it will give me a nice break from the men who throw up on my shoes, don’t respond to my emails and write me from prison.  This show, as corny and silly as you may think it is, appeals to my heart and reminds me to keep the faith.

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