Just when I thought stretching the reunion show to three episodes was really pushing it, just five minutes into hour three, I was wishing it had been stretched to ten hours. This is the most revealing hour of the season for the ladies of New York City.
We start with Kelly walking off the set. When she’s gone, we find out she didn’t leave St. John on her own. She was actually escorted home by a producer, due to her mental breakdown. She is of course unwilling to admit it was a breakdown, and insists it was a breakthrough. \
I think Kelly has a drug problem. She is vacant looking, leaves the set, and comes back a few minutes later, able to continue. Perhaps it was a quick trip the meth lab she carries in her purse. She needs an intervention, and Bravo is obligated to help her if you ask me.
Kelly is saying that all the problems on St. John were because everyone was constantly drunk. Does not apply to Bethenny, and quite frankly, does not apply at all. Kelly is a nut job. She appears to have no recollection of the trip at all. It’s not funny, or entertaining.
If Bravo allows this woman to come back on another season of this show, I will be surprised. Who would want to be around this woman? I am amazed by the fact that they even allowed her on the reunion. They should have banned her, and said they would not allow her to appear.
They are talking about Jill’s surprise visit to St. John, and let me just say, Jill is beyond unappealing. She is a mean spirited, lying, spoiled brat, and does not deserve to a) be friends with Bethenny, or b) invited back for another season with the New York City housewives.
Jill is whining about something I have already zoned out, and Ramona has a surge of testosterone, and stands up to rip Jill a new one. She is up on her feet, and calling Jill out on the fact that she came to St. John with an attitude, instead of groveling for forgiveness.
I’m with Ramona on this one. Jill could have changed the entire bourse of events if only she had an ounce of humility. The best part of the entire exchange, is Andy Cohen’s face. He loves it, and I am loving watching his reaction. Andy is awesome, Ramona is fabulous, and Jill is a boring.
Jill is screaming about being thrown out, and not even being offered a glass of water. Ramona is denying she threw Jill out, while Sonja is assuring Jill that Ramona was concerned for her. It was obvious when Ramona got up from her pedicure to talk to her. Lesson learned: rich chicks are insane.
Ramona is saying Jill is two-faced, and Jill wants another play back of the tape. Jill thinks that if it’s not on film, it never happened. She is out of control. Her ego is massive, and I’m so over her. Jill then says that Alex caused all the problems on St. John.
Jill is yelling at Alex, Kelly is twirling her hair and having a conversation with herself, Bethenny is sitting there wanting to kill herself, Sonja is praying for a drink, Countless is trying to figure out how to butt in, and Ramona is having a psychic moment. This is fabulous television.
Countless is up next, and we find out that her ex-husband, Count Loser of Loserville, hates Jews. When asked point blank if he hates Jews, she does not answer. She hums and haws, and says it’s not that he “dislikes Jews”, he would just be surprised if she was with a Jew.
What does that mean? Would he be surprised because he has openly shared his feelings about Jews with her? Could that be the reason for his disgust? I think Countless is a skank, her ex-husband is a moron, and her new boyfriend should hustle his Jewish ass away from these anti-Semites.
Important to note, she did not divorce him because he was an anti-Semite. She clearly knew this is how he felt, and remained married to him. What does that say about her, and the repercussions for her children? Is she dating a Jew to get back at the Count for dumping her ass?
Andy reminds everyone that Ramona and Bethenny accused the Countless of cheating on her husband. They both apologize, and Countess refuses to talk about it, out of respect for her family. She won’t cop to have an affair, but can admit the father of her kids hates Jews? I don’t get it.
We find out that the Jew hating Count has been married four times, but as each ex-wife remarries, she loses the title. Interesting dilemma for the Countless. Is she willing to marry Jacques and have people stop referring to her as the Countless, and instead call her a Jew Lover? Tough choice.
Kelly is questioned about all of her contradictions. She cannot form a sentence that makes sense. She is an idiot, uneducated, and ridiculous. She seriously needs to be in a hospital. Seriously. A special hospital, with 24-hour observation, rubber walls, and lots of rainbows and unicorns.
Kelly say there is a lot of chatter with the ladies. The problem is that the chatter is in her head. She is hearing voices, which could be an effect of the meth, and needs to stop. She rambles on for what seems like days, and I just pray it will end. It is painful and must stop.
Sidebar: Kelly’s take on PETA makes me want to put her in a cage for a year, feed her a heavy diet of oily foods, skin her alive, and then leave her alone to die a slow and painful death. Kelly, you are an idiot. Those furs you wear are from tortured animals. Shut up, and stop wearing fur.
They are talking about Playboy, and Alex’s naked pictures. Jill is attacking Alex, Alex is defending herself, Ramona is being prudish, Bethenny wants to escape, Countless is panicking because she has remembered Andy is Jewish, Jill is plotting how to get her own show, and Kelly has zoned everyone out.
Andy goes around and asks who will come back for another season, should they do one. Bethenny is pretty much out, Ramona would come back, Alex is loving her new balls, and wants to come show them off. Sonja is getting into her groove, and wants to return.
Countless may come back, but it depends how many Jews are going to be on the crew. Kelly would need to think about it, which makes no sense because she does not think. Jill does not think she could do another season, and it’s because she does not want to shoot with Alex again.
Hey Bravo, she is giving you an ultimatum. It’s her, or Alex. Listen to me, listen to America, we are sick and tired of Jill, and do not want to see her anymore. You need to kick her ego driven ass to the curb, keep Alex, and call it a day.
Jill says she loves Bethenny and would like to see her baby. She fake cries, and asks Bethenny for a hug. Best part of the night, Bethenny does not get up. She just sits there, and let’s Jill come to her. Loved it. Jill must work for it, and by work for it, of course I mean don’t get sucked in Bethenny.
And so another season ends. It was really good, and hour three was perfect. I was convinced I wanted this show to go away, but now, not so much. Bring it back, without Jill, Kelly, or Countless, and I will give you another season of my time. Until we are back in NYC, keep the faith ladies.
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