October 30, 2011 | 11:51 am

My Second Date, My Beautiful Son & Having Today Be Enough

Posted by Ilana Angel

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I had my second date with Sparky on Thursday night.  If you need a reminder, he is the lovely man who was 36 minutes late for our first date.  On our second date, he called me as I was on my way to meet him, to let me know he was going to be about 45 minutes late.  Do you see a pattern forming?

I wrote after our first date that Sparky was a nice man, but not necessarily my type.  The people in my life who know the men I have dated in recent years, can tell you they all had the same look.  Bald, tattooed, Jewish men, who are cops or prisoners.  My type has been “asshole”.

Sparky is not an asshole.  He needs to be taught some dating etiquette, but other than that, he is a decent man, who treats me with respect, and makes me laugh.  He listens to what I say, is not intimidated by my sarcasm, and finds my blog to be not only entertaining, but not scary.

I told Sparky dating me meant he would be in the blog on occasion, and he responded, “Dating a woman who writes a blog is actually beneficial, because she tends to be more open with how she feels.  Some might be afraid or concerned, if you can put that aside you can find out a lot more about the person you are dating.”

It’s a nice way to look at the blog I suppose.  When I told him I was going to out him for his being late on both of our dates, he responded,  “While I may have made a very catastrophic mistake with my poor dating etiquette, I am glad it can be a learning experience for not only, me, but for all the other men in the world who are reading the blog.”

Now I’m sure he was being sarcastic, which I love, but in the end, whether he is okay with the blog or not, he has never told me not to write about him. He understands it is my job, and my passion. In what is proving to be a history book for my son, he is an important chapter.

Sparky is a nice man.  He is kind, generous, sweet and funny.  He treats me like a lady, and so maybe I never knew a man like him was my type, because I’ve never dated a man like him.  I have spoken of him with my son and my child told me that whatever happens with Sparky, he likes him.

My almost 16 year old child told me, “You are the greatest woman I have ever known and you deserve to be with someone wonderful, and now that I am old enough, I want to give my stamp of approval on any man who is going to have the pleasure of spending time with my awesome mother.”

I have raised a remarkable young man.  He is sensitive, kind, funny, smart, generous, loving and compassionate.  I am raising my son to be the type of man I would want to meet.  All this time I was certain Sparky was not my type, it would appear he has the qualities I have taught my son.

At the end of the day, it’s been two dates and so who cares?  I care actually. My life is built around taking care of my son and helping him become a decent human being.  For my son to recognize the type of man he wants me to be with is really lovely. That he looks out for me, matters.

I have no idea what will happen with Sparky.  I know for sure that we are going out again, and that I am looking forward to it.  I know that my son is going to be a wonderful man, and that I am going to embrace the woman in his life, because he will have selected a decent and wonderful girl.

Thanks to all of you who wrote to ask about Sparky.  That you care, and take the time to think of me, is comforting.  There are so many of you, who I do not know, but feel a friendship with.  I live a small life, in a big way, and the journey is much easier with all of you coming along for the ride.

I am one of those people who think that if given the opportunity to see into the future, I would want to.  This morning however, I woke up thinking that today, right now, is good.  Good enough that I am able to appreciate yesterday, and look forward to tomorrow.  I don’t need to know any more.

We spend so much of our lives thinking ahead, or regretting the past, that it can hinder our ability to enjoy today.  My life is blessed.  My son is healthy, and my future is bright because he is in it.  Thank you for reading, sharing, and caring.  You all make it much easier to keep the faith.