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Keeping the Faith

December 1, 2011 | 12:47 am

Kissing Strangers

Posted by Ilana Angel

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Before we tackle this subject I think we need to establish how important kissing is.  For me, I can fall for a man based on just one kiss.  Sadly I can also dump a man based on just one kiss.  I believe you can tell a lot about a man by how he kisses.  Kissing is a powerful thing and what men don’t realize is that even though they all say they are good at it, they aren’t. I don’t kiss women, so I’ll leave it with men and simply say kissing is important.

I like to kiss.  Well, if my memory serves me correctly, I like to kiss.  It can be a loving gesture to your children, a warm exchange between friends, or an intimate bonding of two people.  How is it possible that something so special is done so easily with strangers?  I have kissed men on a first date and you can’t really know someone after just one date.  Kissing is important yet we treat it as though it has no value, which I find really interesting.

I often wonder if men are good kissers.  I am convinced that George Clooney is a brilliant kisser.  Just a gut feeling, but I imagine someone that divine cannot be a bad kisser.  I have sat in business meetings and wondered if men I am talking with are good kissers.  I can remember being in high school and wondering if a certain, seriously handsome teacher of mine was a good kisser.  I have even wondered which President was the best kisser.

My girlfriend went on a first date last night.  She had a nice time and when it came to the end of the night, he walked her to the car and kissed her. Not a regular kiss, the holy grail of kisses.  For the first kiss he took her face in his hands and pulled her in.  The simple gesture of taking a woman’s face in your hands is enough to make a bad kiss almost bearable.  When that first kiss was good, and she was receptive, he went for the gold.

He took his right hand, placed it over her left ear, then ran his fingers against her head, going deep into her hair, then grabbed the back of her head and pulled her in. I immediately thought about George and knew he would do the same thing.  My friend was giddy when she told me about her date.  I was really happy for her and found joy in knowing that there was a man who knew how to kiss. If here is one, there must be more!

If that is how he kisses a stranger then one can assume if they go out again and get to know each other better, then the kissing will get better too. Hard to believe he can top his performance but how exciting to think that he might.  Kissing matters and men need to know that when you kiss on a first date, consider yourself lucky because it takes trust for a woman to allow it. You need to make it count because we are going to judge you on it.

To women, my advice would be that if you are going to kiss on a first date, go all in and give your decision a shot at success. Don’t think of it as kissing a stranger, but as a first kiss.  If you end up having a relationship with that person, and all relationships start with a kiss, you want to look back and remember that it was fabulous, not that you hesitated because it was a stranger. Just close your eyes, trust yourself, and keep the faith.

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What a nice thing to read as I wake up this morning.  It got me thinking of the first time my husband kissed me.  Epic!  I still refer to it as “the kiss that changed the world”.  Thanks for a great thought to start my day!

Comment by Tina on 12/01/11 at 5:06 am

I gotta say, it sounds like this guy is a Kissing School graduate! And you might be surprised how many women there are who also don’t reeaaalllly know how to kiss.

Excellent article Ilana!

Comment by Cherie on 12/02/11 at 10:25 pm

Bad kisser = deal breaker. I worked with, then became friends with a man at work, over a two year period, lots of flirting, getting to know each other, I was smitten and intrigued, finally we went on a date. The goodnight kiss, ugh, turned me off in an instant. Call me fickle but the kiss changed everything. We went on a few more dates but my attraction to him fizzled up and fell flat.

Comment by jselucky on 12/04/11 at 8:39 am

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