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Dancing With The Stars: Bolton Sucks, Patridge Annoys, Sarah Palin Shows

by Ilana Angel

September 27, 2010 | 11:55 pm

Week two began without David Hasselhoff.  I was sad to see him go.  Not because I am a huge fan who wanted him to do well, but because I love a good reality train wreck and he was going to provide us with a couple for sure.  I was surprised to see him be the first one out..

Tom is fabulous and Brooke once again wore an unfortunate dress.  The folds over her chest were just weird.  This woman has the most phenomenal body and yet she can’t seem to select a flattering dress.  Someone needs to help this chick pick something pretty.

Rick Fox:  This man is gorgeous and charming.  He is also a surprisingly good dancer for someone so tall.  He is talented and secured himself another week with his quick step.  His daughter was in the audience, which was cute.  His dancing takes back seat to his looks for me, but he’s good.

Florence Henderson:  Florence did great.  She is a senior citizen and her dancing is inspiring.  She makes me want to take ballroom dancing lessons.  “Cindy Brady” was cheering her on from the audience and it was a flash back to my childhood.  I hope she stays around.  I dig her.

Brandy Norwood:  I do not like this chick.  She is constantly complaining and disrespectful to her partner Max.  For someone who is so pretty, she comes across as ugly and I don’t care if she stays or goes, but if I could pick, I’d like her to go.  She is too bitchy for this show.

Michael Bolton:  He appears to have no rhythm or personality.  When he crawled out of the doghouse you couldn’t help but wonder if he felt as humiliated as he looked.  The good news is he will provide the train wrecks we are missing with the Hoff gone.  Bolton will go home this week..

Audrina Patridge:  Seriously, who is this girl and who cares?  She said she is “sacrificing everything” for this show.  Come on, what is she sacrificing?  Being on the red carpet pretending to be famous?  She is beautiful and a great dancer, but she does not belong on the show.

Sidebar:  ABC announced Brad Womack is the new Bachelor.  Really?  We didn’t care about him the first time so why will we care to watch again?  He left his first shot as The Bachelor picking nobody, with both girls crushed.  His getting another shot is gross and desperate.

Jennifer Grey:  I love her dancing, her new face, that she is 50, her kid, her husband and her BFF Jamie Lee Curtis.  I want her to win.  I think she deserves it and is clearly earning it.  She reminds me of another time, one I remember fondly, and I hope she takes it.

Sidebar:  Sarah Palin was in the ballroom to cheer on Bristol.  She looked beautiful and came across as funny and kinda cool.  I know she pisses people off, but on this show her politics don’t matter.  Her coming to support her baby after a rough year in their lives is lovely.

Margaret Cho:  She is the Kelly Osbourne of this season.  She has no self-esteem, does not think she deserves to be there, and is self deprecating.  I really like her and hope she stays.  If she believed in herself half as much as we believe in her, she could stay in the game.

Kyle Massey:  This kid makes me happy.  He is so cute and funny.  I want so much for him to stay on the show because he is a pleasure to watch and is a highlight of the evening.  He’s not the best dancer but he is the best showman and he will get my vote tonight and every night.

Kurt Warner:  He is good.  The football players have been hit and miss, so maybe it’s because he’s a quarterback that he has such good moves, but he is really good.  He is a bit insane that he thinks he is helping with the choreography, but whatever.  He’s good and fun to watch.

Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino:  The Situation has a real situation with his pigeon toes.  He has a tough road ahead with him, partially because he can’t dance, and mostly because the judges hate him.  I like him and find him entertaining, but at the end of the day this is not the show for him.

Bristol Palin: There’s something melancholy about her, like she thinks this is her shot at redemption.  No need to worry as she is really good.  Her little sister Piper screaming could be heard loudly and it was adorable.  I dig her and not ashamed not say it. Dance Bristol, dance!

I love this season.  There is enough of a mix of different people that both me and my son can be interested.  There are very few shows that he will tolerate watching with me, so for this piece of true family entertainment to stay around, I am keeping the faith.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

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Ilana Angel writes two blogs for JewishJournal.com. KEEPING THE FAITH is about her worldview as a single Jewish mother, and KEEPING IT REAL is all about reality television....

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