March 30, 2010 | 8:31 am

Celebrating Passover with Dancing With the Stars

Posted by Ilana Angel

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Last night, as I was heading to my Seder, I wiped out on the stairs going to the car.  I twisted my ankle badly, and still cannot believe how much it hurt, or how big the bruise on my bum is!  I toppled down a full flight, in what felt like slow motion, and it was not graceful.

I was heartbroken to not make it to the Seder.  Instead of celebrating with my fantastic Rabbi and friends, at our Temple Seder, I settled in for the night with a bottle of wine, a box of matzo, a bottle of ibuprofen, and the magic that is Dancing With The Stars.

Tom Bergeron is brilliant, and truly a master at live television.  He is so fast on his feet, that it again begs the question, why has this man not won an Emmy?  Stop with the Probst monopoly already.  Jeff does not deserve an Emmy as host.  Tom hosting live, trumps Jeff being edited.

As for Brooke Burke, she is a million times better than Samantha Harris.  Samantha “quitting”, is the best thing to happen to DWTS.  I just wish Brooke would stand up straight, and stop slouching.  She is gorgeous, and her body rocks, but she is always hunched over like an old lady. 

As Jews across the world searched for freedom from that which enslaves us, spray painted celebrities, searching for redemption, and another ride on the merry-go-round that is Hollywood, danced up a storm, and delivered an excellent evening of television.

Shannen Doherty: The first time she danced, she was nervous and pulled the “doing it for my sick dad” sympathy card.  There is a generation of people who love her, and she should have just chilled, and saved her milking for later.  Last night we saw Brenda, not Shannen, and it was fabulous.  She got her confidence back and it showed.

Aiden Turner: He is partnered with Edyta, who quite simply has the greatest body on television.  While he is great to look at, I think he should go.  He is not a great dancer, which is why Edyta elbowed him in the face.  Twice.  He tried to look vulnerable, but looked like an unattractive crybaby instead.  A pretty face is not enough to be attractive. 

Evan Lysacek: He is charming, sweet, and just lovely.  I think he is a great dancer, and will be there until the end.  He is a tall, dark, and handsome drink of water, and a pleasure to watch.  His partner is forgettable, which makes him shine brighter.  One thing, get an updated haircut Evan.

Niecy Nash:  I was really not expecting to like her, because she is a little over the top.  It turns out I really don’t like her, I love her.  She is adorable, and I want her to do well.  She is trying so hard, and looks beautiful.  Last night she was fabulous and I voted for her.  Rock on Niecy!

Jake Pavelka:  Really?  Who would have thought that white toast, boring Bachelor Jake, would be so fantastic?  He is completely shining on this show, and I find myself really liking him.  He is more attractive here, than he ever was on The Bachelor.  Don’t tell, but I voted for him too.

Buzz Aldrin:  How can you vote out a hero?  It’s sad because I wanted him to do well.  He can walk away proud of having done it, and showing that 80 is a state of mind.  It was cute to watch him last week, a new generation discovered him, but now I’m done.  Bless you Buzz. 

Nicole Scherzinger:  She is beautiful, funny, skinny, charming, and a fantastic dancer.  She has nothing to worry about, and will stay in until the very end.  For her it’s a popularity contest, not a dancing competition.  She is doing an amazing job, and should celebrate by eating a sandwich.

Erin Andrews:  She is the most annoying contestant ever.  She was on the Bonnie Hunt Show this week with Maxim, and they have no chemistry, and there is clearly no love lost there.  I think they can’t stand each other, and it shows.  I really, really, really, want her to go home first. 

Pamela Anderson:  I can’t quite figure out what it is about her, but she is insanely appealing.  She is stunning, funny, sexy, yet the girl next door, and you feel like you could be her friend.  She is my favorite, and I want her to win.  Who knew that she would be so loveable? 

Chad Ochocinco:  He is yummy.  I had never heard of him before this show, and came into it with favorites picked, based on who I knew.  That I am pulling for him, with no knowledge of who he is, says a lot about how great he is.  The judges slammed him, so we’ll see if he sticks around.

Kate Gosselin: This is a bossy lady.  I thought she emasculated her ex-husband, and you can see it creeping in here. When she told Tony that a lot of people quit on her in life, I was done.  I tried to like her, but it’s just too hard.  She is a victim, I’m over her, and she sucks as a dancer.

It was another great week, and tonight is the first elimination show.  Buzz, Kate, Aiden, and Erin all have my vote to go home!  Pam is a fresh baked challah, and Kate is an old piece of matzo.  As for America getting it right, and sending the right person home?  I’m keeping the faith.