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Jewish Journal

A Teenager Gets his First Man Cave & it’s the Beginning of the End for Mom

by Ilana Angel

December 23, 2010 | 9:25 am

My son will be 15 in less than a month.  I cannot believe how fast the time has gone.  I am not only amazed every single day that I am able to love someone this much, but that the love grows every day.  I love him with my entire self, and equally as important, especially at this age, I like him.

Yesterday I swapped bedrooms with my son.  I gave him the master suite with private bath, and 3 closets, and I took his smaller room with one closet.  It took us all day to make the move.  We had to move beds, dressers, bathrooms, and closets.  About 6 hours in, I questioned my decision.

Swapping rooms was not a big deal.  I use my room to sleep and it was silly for me to have all the space when it just sat unused most of the time.  My son has friends sleeping over most weekends, and it’s insane how they pile into his room.  They are a can of sardines so we needed to switch.

When we were done my son posted on my Facebook page that he loved his new Bachelor Pad.  He also told me that for his birthday he wants a mini fridge and a microwave oven.  I started laughing until I realized that he was not kidding.  He really wants them for his upcoming birthday.

And so it begins.  My baby became a boy and my boy is now becoming a man.  His room rocks.  Totally nicer than when it was mine.  He has his bed, a little sitting area where we will put a futon for his friends to sit and play video games, and he can now comfortably sleep 7 in his room.

He loves having a sense of privacy in his own space.  He woke up this morning and immediately came to hug me and tell me he loved me.  He said, “Mom, I am so happy with my life right now.”  That is the stuff that a mother’s dreams are made of.

I love him so much and I would do anything for this kid.  I will not however, get him a microwave or a mini fridge.  By will not, of course I mean I might do the fridge but I am not doing the microwave!  There will never be any reason for him to leave his room if I give in to his gift list!

I hope I have not created a monster.  I am happy he just wants a fridge and not a bell or whistle to summon me into the cave to bring snacks.  It’s fascinating to see a child grow into a man.  I can see all the things about him that will drive his wife crazy and it makes me laugh.

I am raising a good man.  He will respect women, respect himself, and be a good partner, and I am proud of that.  He gets all the benefits of being raised by a woman, and also the benefits of being raised by a single mother who likes men.  It is helping form him into someone special.

The next stage of parenting has begun and there are rules.  No Internet without his bedroom door open, no wet towels on the floor are permitted, and the doorknob has been changed to one without a lock.  He’s a wonderful kid, and I’m a wonderful mother, so I’m watching.

My kid got great things for Hannukah, but his getting the master bedroom is his favorite thing.  He feels independent and respected.  That is the best thing ever.  It also happened to be the cheapest gift he got.  Go figure.  A teenager + a man cave = Mom is keeping the faith.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

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Ilana Angel writes two blogs for JewishJournal.com. KEEPING THE FAITH is about her worldview as a single Jewish mother, and KEEPING IT REAL is all about reality television....

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