Posted by Ilana Angel
Rielle Hunter is a single mother. She is a woman who loves her little girl, and is trying to give her the best life possible. Rielle Hunter is also, in my opinion, a delusional sociopath, who has lost touch with reality, and lives in a world she has created in her mind. This woman is simply not well, and decided to go on The Oprah Winfrey Show, so we could all see it first hand.
The interview starts out with Ms. Hunter telling us she calls John Edwards “Johnny”, because he never seemed like a “John” to her. However you wish to refer to him is fine Rielle. Since he doesn’t seem like a John or a Johnny to me, unless it’s a hooker reference, I’m going to refer to him, for the purposes of this article, as “Douchelord”.
If you were going to be on the Oprah Show, knowing that everyone was going to see you, and frankly judge you, why wouldn’t you get your roots done, so you wouldn’t look like a skanky whore, but rather the high class and educated hooker that you are? Furthermore, if you knew there was a camera shooting from behind you, why not brush the back of your hair?
Rielle let us know that it is “not her experience”, that a third party can wreck a home. She says problems already exist in a marriage when a third party comes along. Is the implication that this has happened to her before? I interpreted what she said to mean that this is not the first time she has ruined a marriage.
Rielle Hunter kept laughing throughout the interview at the weirdest times. Nothing was funny, but she was cracking herself up. She reminded me of Bette Davis in Whatever Happened to Baby Jane. She was in her own little world, and it was as if she had pity for Oprah, because she was not able to see the world the same way she did.
In reference to her calling Douchelord “hot”, when she met him, she said it was not describing him in terms of sex appeal, but rather that he was “hot” from the perspective of standing out from the crowd. She said he felt authentic and real to her. Does she think we’re buying this? I have been watching the interview for 5 minutes, and she is clearly crazy.
Her goal, when she first met Douchelord, was to help him find his authentic self, so he could be himself. Blah, blah, blah. They spoke on the phone, she went to his hotel room, and so it began. She was going to help him live a truer life. Translation: she is a hooker, he is a pig, and the love affair begins. (Insert projectile vomiting sounds here.)
So now, we’ve established that she is a person who is committed to truth, and does not believe in lies. Is she so delusional, that she actually thinks this makes sense? We’re supposed to believe she had a one night stand with him, a few phone calls, she is in love, and is going to somehow set him free to be who he is meant to be? Oh. My. God.
She says that she felt being with him, even though he was married, was okay, because he was “available”. He wanted to be with her, and that made it all right. Mr. Available, then dumped her over the phone. He called her, and told her he was done, and would not have any further contact with her. Rielle did not believe it, and assumed they would be together.
We are then fed a plate of crap, when she tells us that she is conservative, and believes in living a life of integrity. She admits this is a contradiction, and she understands why everyone is judging her. She is giggling, and sitting very rigidly in her chair. We are now 22 minutes into the hour long interview, and I am convinced she has a bunny cooking on the stove.
She tells Douchelord she is pregnant. He is running for President of the United States, and yet he is being gracious to her when she tells him about the baby. He is married, hoping to be President, and he is okay with his slutty girlfriend having a baby? Hey Rielle, I think the bunny is done. Shall I open a bottle of Chianti?
Rielle is now crying, because she agreed to say Andrew Young was the father of her baby, and that made her worry that one day the baby would grow up and feel bad that she was the reason her daddy never became President. After everything she has gone through, her worry is that the baby will be blamed for Edward’s downfall. Can I get ketchup with my rabbit?
By this time, Oprah is laughing, because this woman is talking, but the only thing that is clear, is that she is a loon. In terms of the GQ photos, she wanted to have one sexy picture of herself, to counter all the ugly pictures. Translation: she wanted Elizabeth to see the pictures so she could be the young, sexy mistress. Seriously? This broad is disgusting.
When Oprah asks what she wants people to come away from the interview with, she says she wants people to know she is real, true to herself, and authentic. She is living her truth, and wants us to see it. She also says her intention is never to hurt anyone, and she does not know if she hurt Elizabeth Edwards. Really? Come on! Is she this delusional for real?
She will not say what her relationship with Douchelord is now. She is in love with him, and believes that he is in love with her. Interesting. Since he is no longer with his wife, if he loved her, would he not be with her and the baby? I am of the opinion that this woman is not well. She was just plain crazy when he met her, and she is now Fatal Attraction crazy.
She ends the interview saying she is a better person because of everything that has happened, and so is Douchelord. She says he sees the baby, and both she, and Quinn, get financial support from him. She looks happy, and somewhat proud of herself. I suppose ruining lives, can have that effect on some people. Good for her.
I came away from the Oprah interview wishing I had not wasted an hour of my life watching it. I think Rielle Hunter should be ashamed of herself, and I’ve got $20 that says by the time that little girl hits 12, she’ll be begging to change her name. We will never really know what happened, and at the end of the day, we will never really care.
To Rielle Hunter, you are a sad woman, and need help. You are delusional, and crazy. The good news is that you are not the bad guy in this story. John Edwards is. There are no words to describe how disgusting you are Mr. Douchelord. You are a lying, cheating, snake, and are on the A Train to hell, so buckle up, as I imagine you will be travelling rather quickly.
My prayers go out to Elizabeth Edwards. I hope she is fighting her best fight, and enjoying her time with her children. No marriage is perfect, there is blame on everyone in this story, at the end of the day however, you deserved better, and I hope the consolation is that you will have peace in the final chapter of your life. Be well, and keep the faith.
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April 29, 2010 | 8:28 am
Posted by Ilana Angel
Sandra Bullock did what so many women were hoping she would. She filed for divorce. Not only did she file for divorce, but in her legal papers, rather than use the Hollywood favorite of “irreconcilable differences”, she listed the cause of her divorce as: “The marriage has become insupportable because of discord or conflict of personalities that destroys the legitimate end of the marriage/relationship and prevents any reasonable expectations of reconciliation.”
I loved Sandra Bullock before this whole mess started. Now, not only do I love her, but I also respect and admire her. She is brave and strong, and unlike Elin Woods, she respects herself enough to walk away from a man who did not respect her, and their life together. Elin Woods should pay very close attention to how Ms. Bullock is handling herself through all of this. It’s not too late for her to come to her senses, and walk away from her disgusting, lying and cheating husband. Don’t be a doormat Elin. Take another look at what Tiger did, and walk away. Be brave.
I am getting bored with men who say they are suffering from sex addiction. It is a convenient label to put on yourself when you have crossed a line, and there appears to be no way back. What they are suffering from, is a case of “I’m famous-she won’t leave me-I can sleep with anyone I want, porn star loving-Nazi worshipping-money seeking-skanky whore digging-I don’t care what my kids will think of me-itis.” This ailment is more commonly known as, “Imadouchelorditis.” Sadly, there is no cure.
We found out that Sandra had filed for divorce, on the same day she shared with the world that she had adopted a little boy, named Louis. This delicious little baby is 3 months old, and was born in New Orleans. She had been working on the adoption forever, and the steps that were taken to get him, were done with James. The more we learn about what has been going in Sandra’s life, the more crushing her situation becomes. She was building a life with a man who was secretly undermining everything she did.
Bad enough that James sat by while Sandra publically thanked him, in every single acceptance speech she gave during the Hollywood awards season, but he sat there crying, pretending to be moved by her love for him, when really he was crying because he knew that they had just received this child, as a blessing into their lives, and he was going to lose it all. While she planned out her future with this man and their baby, he was banging skanky whores, and sat there knowing the end was in sight, but acting like the devoted husband.
Jesse James told People Magazine: “The love I have for Louis cannot be put to words. Not having him around to love and to hold has left a huge hole in my heart. Sandy is the love of my life, but considering the pain and devastation I have caused her, it would be selfish to not let her go. Right now it is time for me to beat this addiction that has taken two of the things I love the most in life.” Are you kidding me? Really? Jesse James is a pig, and if he thinks we’re buying this load of crap, then he is also a moron.
How dare he say that it would be selfish for him to not let her go? It has nothing to do with you buddy. Even if you begged, which I’m sure you did, she wouldn’t take you back. She has too much respect for herself, her child, and her heart, to stay with you. Where you worried about how selfish you were being while you slept with other women? Are you so delusional that you think dealing with your “sex addiction” will make it all better?
Sandra is a hero. To every woman who has been broken, she is a hero. To all the women who are in relationships right now, where they know they are being disrespected, gather strength from her, and get out. To Elin Woods, get out. It is better to forge ahead on your own, even if you are heartbroken and scared, than stay with a man who does not respect you, and your life together. Sandra Bullock filing for divorce was brave, and the right thing to do. Period.
I know it’s a private matter. I know she is not obligated to share her story with anybody. Just because she is a celebrity, she does not owe us a thing. I get it. The bottom line though, is that we feel like we know her. We felt her joy when she was winning accolades, and we felt her heartache when all this happened. For her to open up and let us in, shows that in addition to respecting herself, she respects her fans. Sandra Bullock is a movie star. Not a celebrity, but a good old-fashioned movie star. She respected not only herself, but also her fans.
I know her new baby, Louis, will give her the strength to move ahead, and build a new life. Loving a child can make even the darkest times seem like they are passing quickly. There is something special about a mother and son that is indefinable. I love my son, and every single decision I make revolves around him. Everything happens for a reason, and that all this went down while they were adopting is a blessing. She lost a tool, and gained an angel. Fair trade.
To Sandra and Louis, Mazel Tov on finding your way to each other. We wish you all good things. To Sandra, bravo. You are an inspiration, and your actions will perhaps allow another woman in a similar situation, to be strong, walk away, and keep the faith.
April 27, 2010 | 10:48 pm
Posted by Ilana Angel
I have not blogged about American Idol at all the season. There was nothing interesting to say, because the show is no longer interesting. That was true until tonight. Taking into account that I am Canadian, and not just because I love most things Canadian, I think Shania Twain is perfection.
She is beautiful charming, funny, sweet, and Canadian. I love her. She should have been the judge that replaced Paula Abdul. Having her, Simon and Randy would have been perfect. Kara is useless, and Ellen, though fabulous, doesn’t know what she’s talking about.
Having the contestants sing her songs was great. She writes such wonderful lyrics, that any singer, of any genre, can interpret them in any way they like. Shania has been on my iPod for years, and tonight I was reminded why. She is talented beyond measure, and gave AI their best night of the season.
I wrote a couple of blogs about Ryan Seacrest last week, and they were met with a mixture of agreement and anger. At the end of the day, I stand by the original blog, and ask the question again: What is appealing about this man? I don’t get it, and never will.
I think Ryan produces great television, is fabulous on the radio, both here in LA for my morning drive, and on American Top 40. He is cute, and loves his mom. He should not however, be hosting this show anymore. I find myself more annoyed by him with each passing week. Ryan Seacrest is lame.
Jake Pavelka, The Bachelor, has been given the boot off of Dancing With The Stars. It makes perfectly good sense since he is not a star. No big surprise, he started crying. He also referred to his dance partner, Chelsie Hightower, as one of his best friends. Sad really.
He also thanked Chelsie “for being so great to my beautiful fiancé Vienna.” I know everyone thinks that now the show is over, he will dump Vienna. I don’t think so. I want a reality show about Jake and Vienna. Watching a firecracker, and a piece of white toast, living together, has endless potential.
Highlights for Jake tonight were when he called the show “Dancing With Stars”. When he talked about being there for 6 episodes, like it was his own show. Best part ever however, was when Vienna glanced at the camera, realized she could not force herself to cry in time, and you know when the camera turned away from her, she bit her lip in an attempt to get tears. I love this couple and again, they need their own show.
Glee is one of the greatest shows on television. I rarely wonder off the reality path, but this is one show I am hooked on. The music is fabulous, the actors are divine, the characters are fantastic, and the writing is stellar. The song selection is beyond good, with the perfect mix of old and new. Quote of the night. “I think my cat is reading my diary.”
There are not a lot of shows that can be enjoyed by a mother and her teenage son. I am so grateful when one comes along, because it allows me to share a quiet moment with my son, and those are getting less frequent as he establishes his own life, with his friends.
It was a great night. I settled in with my son, the cat, and TIVO. As fast as life has become, there is an old fashioned comfort, in being safe at home, with your family close by, and the television. Will Glee be on for years, so I can have more of these fleeting and divine evenings with my boy? I’m keeping the faith.
April 27, 2010 | 12:03 am
Posted by Ilana Angel
I was happy to see that Brooke Burke had an even chest this week. Good dress selection. Her hair however, was not cute. I am hoping that at least one time this season, Brooke can pull off a good dress, good hair, and no slouching, all in one episode. My fingers are crossed, and by crossed, of course I mean I’d bet $100 it’s not going to happen.
Jake Pavelka: Did he actually say that he was not as good a dancer as Evan or Nicole, but that he was catching up? Really? Is he drunk? You are nowhere near where they are Jake, and you are not catching up. What you are doing, is getting better each week, and that’s fun to watch. You wont win though Sweetie. Why? Because it’s dancing with the “stars” and you are a filler. Good job this week though, and I’d like you to stay.
Evan Lysacek: If you watched this show for the fist time this week, and did not know who the celebrities were, and let’s face it, most people don’t, it would be hard to tell who was the celebrity and who was the professional dancer. Evan was brilliant, and Anna was gorgeous, and together they were fantastic. The judges said they were not great, which was ridiculous. Not only was their opinion way off, they inspired me to do what I have never done before. Include them in my recap.
Bruno, Len and Carrie Ann: Shut up. Just stop talking. We don’t care about what you have to say, particularly when it’s rubbish. Seriously, this was the first time that I thought you were all crazy, by first time, of course I mean the first time I blogged about it. It’s typical that one of you will be way off, while the other two will see the dancing like we, the audience do, but this week you were all off. You robbed Evan of a great score, for no other reason than you were all drinking.
Niecy Nash: She is entertaining. It’s only a matter of time before she goes, but she is great. She is fun to watch, fun to listen to, and fun to cheer on. She is getting better every week, even if it’s by miniscule amounts. She is having a ball, and that is a pleasure to be a part of. I think she is beautiful, her body is fabulous, and I love her a little bit more because of how she loves herself. Bravo.
Erin Andrews: Don’t know who she is. Don’t get her. Don’t like her. Don’t think she is a celebrity. Don’t think she is charming. Don’t think is funny. Don’t know why she is on this show. Don’t get why Max digs her. All that said, she was fantastic tonight. Great job, whatever your name is.
Chad Ochocinco: He is getting better. He is cute. He is obviously having sexual relations with his partner. He will go home soon. They will break up soon after.
Nicole Scherzinger: What the hell was she wearing during the practice? Sweat pants, and a Michael Jackson inspired military jacket, that was two sizes too small. Plus she was whiny. Her poor me attitude its getting annoying, and we’re not buying it. She is perfection, and the judge’s score will keep her in to the end, but it will be her attitude and personality, that gets her the win. She needs to be careful, or she will be the best dancer to never win. Thin line between us loving you, and you grossing us out Nicole,is very thin so be careful.
Pamela Anderson: Great dance. Insane Body. Horrible hair. She’s going home.
Love Tom Bergeron, love this show, and predict the bottom two on Tuesday night will be Pam and Jake, with Pam going home. I’m going to miss this show when it wraps up in a few weeks. As for next season, I have two suggestions for you ABC: Jack Osbourne and Florence Henderson. Will they do it? I’m keeping the faith.
April 26, 2010 | 10:49 am
Posted by Ilana Angel
I love Bret Michaels. While his music is not really my cup of tea, he is a reality television icon, and I dig him. Anyone who can do a television show about finding the perfect skank, and come out looking charming and endearing, has got something special.
Mr. Michaels is currently in ICU, having suffered a brain hemorrhage last week. This came less than two weeks after he had to have an emergency appendectomy. He has also been battling diabetes since he was a little kid. Bret is 47 years old, and has two young daughters.
His tour manager posted the following statement on his website: “As we all know Bret is a fighter and we are hopeful that once all is complete the slurred speech, blurred vision and dizziness, etc. will be eliminated and all functions will return to normal.”
My prayers are with Bret and his family. This is a lovely man, and all of his fans are not only praying for him to have a speedy recovery, but we also hope he wins Celebrity Apprentice. The good news is that now he can shave his head, rock a fabulous bald dome, and lose the hats with sewn in hair.
Bret Michaels is a good man. He loves his children, and is great at what he does. He has reinvented himself, and built a new career, without compromising who he is. Rock of Love was an entertaining train wreck, but Celebrity Apprentice has given us a look as who he really is, and he is fabulous. Get well soon Bret.
If I live to be a million years old, I will never understand Tiffany Tehan. She is the young wife and mother from Ohio, who left her family to run away with her boyfriend, who also happens to be married. Her baby is one year old, and she decided to leave her, so she could start a new life.
Really? Who does that? Even if she could justify leaving in her head, why not just tell her husband, and go? Was this decision, which caused so much pain, created such drama, and cost so much money, really necessary? At what point does leaving a baby, and a life, seem like a good idea? This is not just one person acting irrationally, but two.
Everyone is talking about this woman who left her baby, and husband, but no one is talking about her boyfriend, who is also married, and left his family. His actions were just as shocking and disgusting as hers, but he seems to be getting a free pass, which is weird.
If you have the balls to cheat on your husband, start a relationship with a man who is married and has his own family, leave your husband, and the innocent little baby who will never understand what you did, then why can’t you have the balls to just say you want out?
I’m not in this woman’s home. I have no idea what she was thinking, or what was happening that made her do what she did. All I know for sure, is that there is no man, no amount of money, no dream of something different, no promise of joy, which would make me leave my kid. Ever.
Like most teenagers, my son went to see the movie Kick Ass this weekend. He left the theater thinking it was an excellent film, and that the star of the movie, Aaron Johnson, was amazing. At only 19, Mr. Johnson is a role model to my son and his buddies, all of who have acting aspirations.
Here’s the deal about the young boy, that my son thinks is so great. When he was 17, he was cast in a movie called Nowhere Boy, where he played a young John Lennon. When he was 18, he filmed the movie, which was directed by a woman named Sam Taylor-Woods, who was then 42 years old, and an established artist, who was directing her first film.
Aaron then began an affair with Sam, who was divorced, had 2 children, and had survived cancer twice. Not only did they have an affair, but they are now “in love”. Aaron is now 19, Sam is 43, and she is 7 months pregnant with her 3rd child, of which Aaron is the father. Are they kidding?
I keep thinking about Aaron’s mother, who must have been so proud of her son that his career was taking off. He was a working actor, that made money, which is rare. Then the director, who is the same age as she is, is now going to be the mother, of her baby’s baby.
When their baby goes off to college, he will be younger than she is now, and she will be in her 60’s. What was she thinking? Her oldest child is only 6 years younger than the father of her baby. I think it’s disturbing, and she should be ashamed of herself.
Her friends told tabloid newspapers in England that Taylor-Woods was not into having a relationship with him, but he was “relentless”, and she caved. Are you kidding me? This little boy, who could be her own child, was able to make her lose her common sense long enough to have his baby?
I don’t care that he is 19 years old, or that he is working and supporting himself. He is just a kid. He should be living his life, and enjoying himself, not changing diapers, and living with a woman is almost 25 years older than him. His stepchildren will be closer in age to him, than he is to the mother of his child.
It was a very strange weekend. The spotlight was placed on a wide variety of people, from a wide variety of places, and it showed us that people are strange. No one is perfect. Everyone has issues, drama, and baggage. It is amazing however, how many people appear to be living with no common sense.
I am never going to leave my child. Ever. Not for any person, place, or thing. I am not going to find myself a 19 year old boyfriend, and have his baby. Ever. All I can do is live my life, pray for those who need help, laugh at the craziness of this world, and keep the faith.
April 25, 2010 | 10:18 am
Posted by Ilana Angel
Every once in a while I come across something that I feel I must spread the word on. This past week I discovered something really great, and want to share. This is a treasure, right here in Los Angeles, so if you’re local, it’s worth taking a look at.
At Your Side Private Exercise is a private gym. While I just discovered it, it was founded by a woman named Lesley Goldberg in 1989. My girlfriend Jyllian and I, went in and did a training session together with Lesley, and it was fabulous.
Lesley was really great. She was friendly and funny, and kept us focused on the workout, without our feeling like we were working out at all. She gave Jyllian and I work out that was adjusted to meet both of our needs, but we were able to do it together, which made it more fun than going alone.
I walk every day, and do yoga, but this was different. When someone shows you exactly what to do, how to do it, and for how long, it changes everything. The next day I was sore, but not in a “never doing that again” way, it was more of an “I can’t wait to do it again” way.
The gym is small, and very clean. The trainers were all kind and friendly. Everyone has their own “specialty” training. For Lesley, she focuses on training people over 40. Lesley is herself over 40, and her body is inspiring, but not intimidating. She made us feel comfortable, and confident.
The clients are all ages, sizes, and fitness levels. The prices are reasonable, and you can go for as many, or as few sessions that you like. There was a woman there who has been training with Lesley for years, was about to turn 60, and looked like she was in her 40’s.
This is a great gym, and a great find. I highly recommend it to anyone who wants to work out in a safe and comfortable environment. You get all the benefits of a full service gym, with your own personal trainer, without having to go to a large scale, meat market, work out experience.
Additionally, Lesley is building up her Orthodox Jewish clientele. She will close the gym on certain days, for certain hours, so it is private training for either the ladies with Lesley, or with a male trainer for the gentlemen. I don’t know of any other gym that offers this specialized service.
At Your Side is located at 223 South Robertson Blvd, one block south of Wilshire, at Charleville. They have parking available in the back, and there is a ton of metered street parking. The phone number is 310-275-5635, and you can visit them online at www.atyoursideprivateexercise.com.
Working out is hard. Not always physically hard because you can decide how far to push your body, but mentally challenging, to motivate yourself. At Your Side, makes it a whole lot easier. If you want to get started, and need a little nudge, call Lesley. She will help you keep the faith.
April 23, 2010 | 11:15 am
Posted by Ilana Angel
My blog is about keeping the faith. The dictionary defines faith as the confident belief or trust in the truth or trustworthiness of a person, concept or thing. Faith is not just about religion. When I am faced with adversity, no matter how difficult things are, I manage to keep the faith.
It’s not always easy. Some days I have abundant amounts of faith to hold on to, and other days, it takes every last ounce of my strength, to find a sliver of faith to pull me through. I have faith in God, in myself, and in people in general. For me, faith is much bigger than just my practice of Judaism.
I like to think that people are inherently good. Listen, I know not all people are good. I am not so naïve as to think everyone is kind, but with all the pain and suffering in the world, and people trying to help, I allow the goodness of a few, to shape how I view people in general. I have faith there will always be kind people.
If I didn’t think strangers were capable of kindness, it would be really hard to be positive about the future for my son, and this world. If I were to focus on all the negative things that are happening in the world, I would never leave my house, home school my kid, and live in constant fear.
If you take into account how I live my life, my choices to be kind, and my conscious decision to keep the faith, you can imagine how crushing it is, when I am attacked for thinking this way. I am a person who tries very hard to not judge people, I don’t always succeed, but at least I try.
I wrote a blog about meeting Sarah Palin, and I was bombarded with hate mail. Not only from strangers, but from people in my own life. I wrote a blog about feeling compassion for Nadya Suleman, and I was once again buried under hate mail. I was judged harshly, for not judging.
I said I would welcome Sarah Palin into my home for dinner, and people wrote to say I was un-American and should be deported back to Canada. I wrote that I felt badly for the struggles that Nadya Suleman faces everyday, and my ability to parent my own child was questioned.
My little blog, and by little of course I mean fabulous, hit a nerve with a lot of people. They were so outraged by my words, that they felt compelled to write me, and share their opinions. It’s great when people write, it’s sad however, when they stop talking about the topic, and attack me.
After the Sarah Palin blogs, I felt sad. It was so upsetting to me that in America, a country with so much hate in its history, hate was still so pervasive. Now, after the Nadya Suleman blog, I am not only sad, but also disgusted. It is hard to keep the faith, when hate is pelted at you.
Why is it so hard for people to be compassionate? I did not say Nadya should be named mother of the year. I simply stated that I felt for her. If you take all your opinions about her out of the picture, and just think about the fact that she is a single mom of 14, can you not find compassion?
If one more person sends me reading material so I can learn all about her, I will scream. I don’t care. I have no interest in knowing anything about this woman. I watched the Oprah interview because I watch Oprah everyday, not because I was tuning so I could start an Octomom fan club.
I stand by my feelings of compassion for this woman. I also stand by my invitation to Sarah Palin, to come to my home for Shabbat dinner. To be clear, I am not comparing Sarah to Nadya. The only thing they appear to have is common, is that people who do not know them, hate them.
It’s interesting how people are so willing to have such strong opinions about people they have never met. I’m not implying that I don’t do it too, because I do. For example, I have never met George Clooney, but I am of the strong opinion, that if he met me, he would want to marry me.
My opinion of Sarah Palin is based on the fact that I met her. I spent time with her, spoke with her, and determined, based on our time together, that she was lovely. I did not register myself as a Republican, shoot a wolf from a helicopter, or plan to hold a tea party in my home.
I am interested in learning what the bible, both old and new testaments, say about hating others. If you have a passage, or biblical reference, please send them to me. I will also research it and see what I can find. Is hating someone, for what they believe in, accepted by God?
I hope I will always be able to live my life in a way I am proud of, and inspires my son to be proud of me. I will continue to think people are inherently good. I hope that when people direct their hate in my direction, I am able to not take it personally, and focus on keeping the faith.
April 22, 2010 | 2:05 am
Posted by Ilana Angel
When I got married, I loved my husband. I believed we would be together forever, raise a family, and grow old, side by side. That was 18 years ago, and my memories have faded with each year and each argument. I cannot remember when I loved him, but remember the last time I hated him.
If given the opportunity to have peace with an ex, would you take it? When someone breaks your heart, even after it’s healed, does war feel better than peace? Is it easier to deal with hurt, if you paint yourself into a corner, where there’s nothing to do but hate?
When in a relationship, can we relax enough to enjoy it for what it is, and be satisfied? Is there always going to be the lingering question: Is the grass greener on the other side? Is anyone ever completely satisfied with their partner? Is really liking someone, a good substitution for love?
I have a friend, who we’ll call “Jimmy”. He dated a girl, we’ll call ”Faith”, for a while, and he said loved her. All of us friends loved them together, and thought he had met his Beshert. They had a great love, but in his mind, he thought he could do better, and so they broke up.
It was shocking because we could not figure out who could be better than Faith. Maybe he wanted someone younger, thinner, smarter, or dumber? We didn’t know, and to be fair, neither did he. Jimmy was just certain that he needed something else, and he would know it, when he found it.
So now he is with a new girl and he really likes her. He says she is everything he wants, in some ways, but not in others. The pieces that were missing in his relationship with Faith, he has with her. The problem is, it turns out that the stuff he had with Faith, was the more important stuff.
According to Jimmy, his new girl is not the same religion, is not an intellectual, does not share his passions, cannot support herself financially, is not a good conversationalist, and while he is insanely attracted to her, he worries that in trying to not settle for Faith, he ended up settling.
If the grass you see everyday, is green enough, is it better to just lay down and enjoy your nice grass, or do you risk losing your perfectly fine grass, to see what is on the other side? As humans, when we become complacent, do we settle, or can we find the energy to strive for something better?
If you give up everything, for the idea of something better, and then you find something that is not better, just different, can you accept it? If you know you can’t go back to what you had, do you just suck it up and settle? Jimmy clearly was asking for some kind of advice, but I could not give him any.
There are many choices in life where you cannot listen to anyone, but yourself. I am not in his relationship, so I do not know what happens everyday, when it’s just them. If I go by the things he tells me, which he undoubtedly does not mention to his girlfriend, I would advise him to go.
We all stayed in touch with Faith, and she has moved on. It took her a long time, but she did it, and she is in a relationship now, with a man who offers her things Jimmy could not. She didn’t settle, but rather found greener grass, which must annoy Jimmy. Faith was happy with Jimmy, yet his leaving, led her to someone better.
Relationships are tough. They are hard to find, and harder to keep. Does the loss of love, gives us a pass to hate? Does the lack of peace, invite us to engage in war? I wish I lived in NYC so I could enjoy urban concrete, and not worry about the grass on the other side of the sunny California fence. Is it harder in Los Angeles, where the weather is good, and you can literally see the grass next door?
With risk can come great reward. That said, you can put everything on the line to see if the grass is greener on the other side, and 99% of the time, the other side will have luxurious, and much greener grass. The problem, is that it also has 20 dogs, who are peeing and pooping all over it.
i am going to make a list of the top ten things I am looking for in a partner. Once I pick my top three, I will not compromise on them. I am open to negotiating the other seven, but I’m sticking firm to my top three. Love is a many splendid thing. The decisions we make, when looking for love, can be made easier if we simply remember to keep the faith.