March 25, 2010 | 1:49 am

I am having horrible dates because of Biden, Hitler, Obama & Palin!

Posted by Ilana Angel

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I could be off by one or two, but I believe I have officially gone out on what seems like one million dates.  I am my own millionaire matchmaker.  Unlike a famous Millionaire Matchmaker, you may know from television, I am a great Jewish woman looking for love, not a disgusting skank, who is an embarrassment to women, Jews, and matchmakers everywhere.  I’m just clarifying.

I think dating is really, really hard.  What’s so interesting to me as a dater, is that it really doesn’t need to be.  Dating should be fun.  A first date is full of promise.  If you remove any and all expectations, and go in with nothing but hope, then it should a great thing.  Every love story started off with a first date, so the possibilities should be endless.

While I think dating can be a great thing, I don’t date just to date.  I put myself through this misery because I have hope that one day I will meet someone wonderful.  As my son gets older, and begins to carve out his own life, my desire to share mine, becomes bigger.  I think the best thing I can do for my son, is fill my own life, so I don’t smother his.

The reoccurring theme that seems to be a part of all my dates, is lying.  Why do people lie?  I know women lie too, but I don’t date women, so let’s make this about men.  Men lie, and it’s really frustrating.  Do they not realize that every first date could be with the woman of their dreams, and they could wreck their chances by being a guy who lies?

If someone is willing to lie, then what does that say about them as a human being?  If you say you are single, when you are married, does that make you a pig?  If you say you are 5’ 11”, and are really 5’ 6”, does that make you an idiot?  If you say you are not a smoker, but show up for a date smelling like an ashtray, does that make you a dumbass?

I love men, and have had some wonderful men in my life.  I have loved some really fantastic men, and been loved back by men who were phenomenal.  I have been a terrific girlfriend and a fantastic wife.  I am a caring, supportive, nurturing, and tactile partner.  I am my best self, when in a loving relationship.  Even knowing all that, I am finding it hard to keep trying.

Before I get a ton of emails saying that I don’t need a man in my life to be fulfilled, that is not what I am saying.  I want a man in my life because I want him there, not because I need him there.  There is nothing wrong with a woman saying she wants a man in her life.  I am saying it.  I want one, I need one, I deserve one, and I am going to eventually get one.

Can somebody please explain why it is so hard to meet someone worthy, and why it is so easy to lie to people about things that should never be lied about?  How is it possible that so many people write to let me know they are in the same boat?  If there are so many great people out there, why are we not finding each other?

I’m the first to admit that I’m not perfect.  I’m also not everyone’s cup of tea.  That said, my horrible dating pattern of late, has nothing to do with me.  I’ve been honest and funny, and feel that I have presented myself in a true, and sincere way.  I guess it would be easier if I had someone to blame for my dating misfortune.  Who can I pin this on?

I could blame Hitler.  It is totally possible that had he not killed 6 million Jews, my Beshert might have been the relative of someone who was murdered, and therefore never given the life he deserved to live, or the opportunity to meet me.  It’s Hitler’s fault that I am not in a committed and loving relationship.  Rotten, filthy, disgusting, sickening bastard.

I could blame Sarah Palin.  People like to blame her for everything that is wrong in our country, and since I live here, I could easily blame her for my being alone.  Thanks a lot Sarah.  You are ruining my love life.  I could blame President Obama, and his passing the health care bill.  Damn you Barack!  I could blame Biden for dropping the F-Bomb!  Are you F-ing kidding me Joe?

Rather than blame anyone, I will just take a self-imposed break, and enjoy Pesach with my son.  I’m not going to be sad that I’ve been on a million dates.  Instead, I will be proud of myself that I am making my way through the heap of frogs, and therefore one step closer to my Beshert, with each date.  It will never be time to quit, so taking a moment to regroup, is a good thing.

So there you have it.  We learned a lot through this little blog of mine.  Men are pigs, people lie, Hitler is to blame for my not being married, Sarah Palin is responsible for my bad choices, President Obama is the reason I have not had a good date in almost a year, and Biden has the mouth of a sailor!  My blog went from being funny, to educational, which is cool.

I’m not going to get discouraged.  I am going to enjoy Passover, and hang out with my kid for his spring break.  I am not going to freak out about turning 44 in two weeks.  I will focus on all the blessings in my life, and then come back after the holiday, with a renewed spirit.  I won’t give up.  I shall simply step away, then jump back in, all while keeping the faith.

 

 

March 24, 2010 | 7:27 am

Celebrity Apprentice: Reality Television Perfection: Bret is Discombooberated & Sinbad Gets Fired

Posted by Ilana Angel

Sunday night was week two of Celebrity Apprentice.  It cracks me up that all the “celebs” are being so polite, when we know there are a few hotheads in the bunch.  It’s entertaining to watch them not be real.  I’m waiting for a big blow up, and pretty sure it’s coming soon.

The show starts off with Bret Michaels giving a check for $100k to the American Diabetes Association.  I am not sure what is more disturbing, his hair, or the fact that I find him oddly attractive.  He was charming with the kids he presented the check to, and I’m glad he won. 

This week they are creating a storefront experience with Kodak, so people of New York can have Kodak moments of their own.  Project Managers are Sinbad, and Maria Kennelis, the WWE chick.  I think she is made of out of plastic, and may actually be animatronic. 

We start off with the men, and Sinbad is all over the place.  I don’t understand anything he is saying, and neither does his team.  They cut away to an interview with Rod Blagojevich.  This guy, and his hair, are truly fascinating.  I think the boys in prison are going to find him very attractive.

The Kodak people are meeting with the chicks, but I am distracted by the Kodak ladies hair.  Why don’t any of her friends tell her that cut is wrong?  Cyndi Lauper needs her own show.  A reality show, where we just follow her around, and watch her life.  She is amazing, and I love her.
 
The girls are annoyed with Cyndi.  Sinbad is annoyed with Bret.  The men are annoyed with Sinbad, but not one person gets pissed off, or says anything harsh.  Really?  You are playing to win, and for charity people.  We will respect you more if you are real, than if pretend to be a “celebrity”.  Everyone is just a little too aware of their image.

What makes their fake niceness even more annoying, is when we see Rod on the phone, talking about his pending case, and the people who crossed him, and he is cursing, and getting upset.  It is fabulous.  Why can’t they be like that with each other, not just when they think the camera is not filming them?

The two best moments are:  1) A random woman on the street mistakes Rod for Donny Osmond.  Really?  I wish I could get drunk and roam the streets of New York.  And 2) Maria is eating a popsicle, in a provocative way, while talking to Donald Jr. and he struggles to pay attention.  Reality television perfection. 

Bret Michaels has a little nervous breakdown, and it’s awesome.  I love him, and his hair made out of straw.  He feels left out, and believes they are shooting him in a way that makes him look like the bad guy.  Poor celebrity ego is pushed to the limit. 

Sharon Osbourne is getting sick, and a write off for this task.  All the chicks are throwing Cyndi under the bus, but not to her face, only to the camera.  Cowards.  On the men’s side, they are all done with Sinbad, but again, only complaining to each other, not to him.  Grow up everyone.

Sinbad screws up with the printer and nobody gets mad.  Bret storms off, and everyone thinks he’s a quitter.  The men’s team is crumbling, but everyone is passive.  Sharon is passing out food, and coughing all over it.  It’s a train wreck and I can’t get enough.

Both storefronts were crowded, and chaotic.  Nice to get your picture taken with a celebrity, but who waits in line for an hour for a picture that then takes another hour to print? I would like to point out again, for no particular reason, Holly Robinson Peete cannot be trusted.

The women win the task and Make a Wish gets $20k from Maria.  One of the men is going down, and it’s weird because they are acting like a bunch of school girls in the boardroom.  Where is the throw down?  They are all being nice, and passive aggressive.  The lack of balls is annoying.

The Governor is such a politician, I was surprised he didn’t pull a baby out from under the boardroom table and start kissing it.  Goldberg starts talking, and they cut to the ladies who are wondering about his “shortcomings”.  Maria looks as if she could confirm, but says nothing.

The Governor, Bret Michaels and Sinbad are in the boardroom and one of them is going to be fired.  Trump asks Brett who should go, and he says Sinbad.  He explains that the first day was very “discombooberated”.  Everyone looks at each other, but nobody corrects him.  Perfection.

Sinbad is fired.  It took 20 minutes instead of the necessary 5.  He looks like he might actually cry when he is canned.  It was sad, and I think he may have been a little discombooberated.  This show rocks, and it’s only just begun.  Next week promises a twist, and I’m all in.

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March 23, 2010 | 7:49 am

Dancing With The Stars –Train Wrecks Are In Our Future.  Hooray!

Posted by Ilana Angel

The 10th season of Dancing With The Stars premiered last night on ABC.  It almost didn’t matter who was dancing, because I was so happy that Samantha Harris was gone, I would have tuned in to watch anyone.  Welcome to Brooke Burke.  My only advice to her as she starts her new job is, eat a sandwich.

First up is Chad Ochocinco:  Are you kidding me with this guy?  His body is insane.  What are the chances that he is Jewish and looking for a 44 year old single mother in the valley?  Seriously, you can pop a quarter off this man’s rear end. He did a great job for his first time out and I think he’ll be around for a while.

Shannen Doherty: She was okay.  She cried for her dad and it was sweet, but a little early to be milking sympathy votes.  I wanted to see her, but she was a bit of a joy sucker.  Her body looked weird, and one eye is much lower on her face than the other.  I grew up watching her, and I think she’ll stay for a little while.

Erin Andrews:  I don’t know who she is, and I don’t think she is even remotely interesting.  Her costume was funky, and it made her right boob look 2 sizes larger than the left one.  I would like it very much if she were the first one to get the boot.  It’s a drag because Max is great to watch, but someone has got to go first, and it should be her.  Bye Bye.

Jake Pavelka:  We all know I didn’t dig him as the Bachelor.  The only reason I was interested in seeing him now, was to watch Vienna watching him.  Here’s the thing, he was really good.  When he starting jumping up and down when he got a 7, I totally crushed on him.  I never would have believed it, but he’s got my vote.  Go figure.

Niecy Nash:  I was most surprised by her, and it had nothing to do with dancing.  I find her to be annoying, and I hate her on The Insider.  But she was charming.  She is funny, and I want her to do well.  Bless her for loving her body, and letting women know it’s cool to not be a size 0. 

Evan Lysacek: What can you say about this guy?  He was great.  He is the best in the world in his sport, and I predict here’s in the finals.  He is oddly feminine, and I want to cut his hair, but he is fabulous.  If he gets the boot, it will be because Anna’s fake hair color was too distracting for America.  Why doesn’t someone tell her that color only works in a Tim Burton film?

Buzz Adrin:  Ouch.  This man is a legend, icon and American hero.  He looks great for an 80 year old, and his flirting is charming.  All that said, he is not a dancer.  Not everyone is going to win, and clearly he is not, but he is special, and I hope he stays around for at least a few weeks.  His wife Lois was adorable, and she is almost as interesting to watch as he is.

Nicole Scherzinger:  It’s impossible for this girl could be any prettier, or appealing.  She is such a sweet girl, that you almost forgive her for being so nice.  Almost.  Great dance and a nice dress, except that I wanted to pull off the pieces of toilet paper they attached to her wrists because they were very distracting.  She got a great score, and will be around until the finals.

Aiden Turner:  Let’s be perfectly clear, I love you Aiden.  I don’t care if he can dance and to be honest, I did not even pay attention to what he did.  I got lost in the accent, the face, all of it.  Super low score, but who cares.  Let’s hope he’s there at least until he take his shirt off.  He is great to look at, and the dancing does not even matter.

Kate Gosselin:  She is the first train wreck of the season.  Dear Lord woman, go home, and watch with your children.  When Bruno was criticizing her, she got the same look in her eye that she used to get before she emasculated her ex-husband on Jon and Kate Plus 8.  This version of the Octomom, needs to go home, and be with her kids.

Pamela Anderson:  I love this chick.  There is not a centimeter on this woman’s body that is not sexy.  I dig her personality, and thought she did great.  She is a gorgeous, but relatable.  She is totally my top female pick, and I’m sure she will be around till the end.  She has an interesting vibe, where you could see yourself as her best friend, even though you would never leave her alone with your husband.  Love her.

It’s going to be a great season.  Brooke Burke did a good job for her first time out, but needs to stand up straight.  Tom Bergeron is fabulous.  I think he should win an Emmy already. Jeff Probst keeps winning for a show that is created in the editing room, while Tom is perfect,  LIVE.  Jeff Probst needs to stop winning, and they need to give Tom an Emmy!

There are some real contenders.  Some will get better with time, and be phenomenal by the finals.  Some are train wrecks that you just can’t stop watching, and others still, will bow out due to injury.  I think it’s the best cast ever and I can’t wait to see how it all plays out.  To those who will soon be on their way home, it probably won’t help, but keep the faith!

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March 22, 2010 | 11:19 pm

Birthdays, Babies, Beauty, Bullock and Bitches

Posted by Ilana Angel

Birthdays: I will be turning 44 in two weeks.  It is hard for me to believe that I am in my mid 40’s, because I feel like I just turned 30.  I don’t feel my age, and I like to think that I don’t look it either.  Maybe there’s a little denial involved, but still, I feel younger than I actually am.

When I was about to turn 40, I was a little spooked.  It felt like I was entering a new phase of my life, and that can be a little scary.  As I rapidly approach 44, I am very secure.  I feel proud of who I am as a women, a mother, a friend and a daughter.

I am embracing this time in my life.  I am aware of who I am, what I want, and what I need to do, to get it.  I want it all.  I want a happy and healthy relationship with my son as he becomes a man, and I want a happy and healthy relationship with a man. 

Babies: I was at a Sunday brunch and open house yesterday, and I was surrounded by babies.  I love babies.  There were some seriously cute kids hanging around, and at one point I could actually hear my ovaries convulsing.  I always wanted to have a lot of kids, but I think that ship has sailed.

As I watched all the babies, it became clear that I am not going to have another one.  It’s not about how old I am, it’s about how old my son is.  I can’t imagine a life where I’m changing diapers, and filling out college applications, at the same time.

It was sad to admit I was not going to have another baby.  At the same time, it was liberating.  I have a delicious son, and I look forward to loving and spoiling his children.  Until then, when I need a baby fix, I will hang with my friends, their babies, and the babies that are coming soon. xo

Beauty: At the party yesterday I met a girl who was so incredibly beautiful, I could not stop staring at her.  She makes Megan Fox look like a troll.  I wonder what it must be like to look like that.  I wanted so much to find something annoying about her, but in the end there was nothing.

She was funny and sweet.  She was also Canadian, and I can’t be hating on my own people.  At the end of the day, I like how I look, and love who I am.  At 44, there is a confidence, understanding, and history, that all combine to make me beautiful.  I wouldn’t go back, because right now is too good.

Bullock: I thought about Sandra Bullock all weekend.  I have been completely and totally in love with a man, who then cheated on me, and broke my heart into a million pieces.  I can remember a time when simply getting out of bed, seemed like too much of a chore.

I hope Ms. Bullock knows her heart will heal.  It will take a while, but she will see the sun again.  It took me over a year to recover from my heartache.  Then it took me close to another year, to trust myself to love again. I wish her well.  I also hope she has the strength to walk away.

Bitches: I’m not offended when someone calls me a bitch.  There are circumstances when it is shocking, and undeserved, but it’s not a word that makes me cry, or crushes my spirit.  As a single mom, who is a survivor, a lot of my accomplishments have been achieved because I was willing to be a bitch.

To the gentleman who felt the need to call me a bitch during our date this weekend, you’re charming.  Was my being annoyed that you are separated, and still living with your wife, not divorced like you said, that inspired the name calling?  Whatever.  Better to be a bitch, than an asshole.  Just saying.

To my new reader Dante, who is a grown man who was raised by a single mother, your email meant a lot to me.  I love my son more than anything, and that you got it, and were able to relate to it yourself, was very special.  Thank you for reading, and taking the time to write.

I had a really great weekend.  It was very busy, but incredibly relaxing.  It was one of those weekends, where I did nothing monumentous, but still felt very accomplished.  I’m counting down the days to 44, as well as counting my blessings.  I am able to do both, by keeping the faith.

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March 19, 2010 | 5:52 pm

Sandra Bullock leaves Jesse James for cheating with a nazi loving hussy

Posted by Ilana Angel

I cannot even begin to understand the humiliation and heartbreak that Sandra Bullock must be feeling.  For months, she has gone to every awards show and said that her personal happiness, and professional success, is directly connected to her husband, Jesse James.  That he has now admitted to cheating on her, is unimaginable.

In a statement he said, “It’s because of my poor judgment that I deserve everything bad that is coming my way.  This has caused my wife and kids pain and embarrassment beyond comprehension and I am extremely saddened to have brought this on them.  The vast majority of the allegations reported are untrue and unfounded.  Beyond that, I will not dignify these private matters with any further public comment.”

I can’t even call Mr. James a pig, because that would be unkind to pigs.  They are so much smarter than this guy.  This man is an idiot, and he has released the most pathetic apology ever.  Does he think that by saying he deserves the bad things that are coming his way, we will feel sorry for him?  Not going to happen dumbass.  How did you get so successful, when you’re not that bright?

The woman in the middle of this marriage is Michelle McGee.  She is a tattoo model, and a seriously screwed up chick.  I love tattoos, and have some of my own, but there has got to be trauma of some kind in your life, that would make a woman tattoo her body with images of hate, including her face.  She has “Pray For Us Sinners” tattooed across her forehead.  That is messed up.  You need more than prayers Michelle.

This girl has a Swastika tattooed on her stomach, a “W” and a “P”, inked on her legs, which reportedly stand for “White Power”, and has posed in a Nazi themed photo shoot.  Really Jesse?  Have you lost your mind?  You need to not only apologize for cheating on your wife, but for your choices, which are disgusting beyond just the cheating.

I don’t get why famous men choose to cheat on their wives with such unattractive, and unappealing women.  Tiger slept with hookers, porn stars and skanks.  John Edwards slept with a whore.  Now Jesse James is sleeping with a woman who is scary, and clearly a damaged human being.  Why sacrifice everything, for nothing?

He sat there and smiled, all the while he was having sex with a Nazi loving, tragic, money hungry, skanky, tramp.  For a man who sells himself as being so cool, that is just not cool.  This man has been married twice, has 3 kids from 2 mothers, and is in a custody battle.  Even with all of that baggage, Sandra loved him.  She did not judge him on his past, which is huge.

We don’t know what goes on behind closed doors.  There could be a million reasons that he felt the need to stray outside of his marriage.  What we do know, is that to publicly humiliate a woman, who loves you, is disgusting.  When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.  He has shown you Sandra.

Sandra got married when she was 40, and came to the table with her own history and baggage.  A marriage breaks apart for a lot of reason and perhaps both are to blame.  All I’m saying, is if you love someone enough to marry them, then love them enough to not humiliate them.  Simply walk away, and allow them the opportunity to handle things in a way that is easy for them.  Not only is James an idiot, but he is a coward.

My disgust is based on disappointment.  I believe in marriage and when one is broken, it is sad.  I feel the same way about a high profile couple, as I do about the couple in the corner apartment.  A marriage is special, and to have it is end is unfortunate.  If you are married, and trying to make it work, I wish you well.  Remember that even if you are not in love anymore, you once were.  Respect each other, and keep the faith.

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March 19, 2010 | 10:44 am

Jesse James is an Idiot Because He’s Not Smart Enough To Be A Pig

Posted by Ilana Angel

I cannot even begin to understand the humiliation and heartbreak that Sandra Bullock must be feeling.  For months, she has gone to every awards show and said that her personal happiness, and professional success, is directly connected to her husband, Jesse James.  That he has now admitted to cheating on her, is unimaginable.

In a statement he said, “It’s because of my poor judgment that I deserve everything bad that is coming my way.  This has caused my wife and kids pain and embarrassment beyond comprehension and I am extremely saddened to have brought this on them.  The vast majority of the allegations reported are untrue and unfounded.  Beyond that, I will not dignify these private matters with any further public comment.”

I can’t even call Mr. James a pig, because that would be unkind to pigs.  They are so much smarter than this guy.  This man is an idiot, and he has released the most pathetic apology ever.  Does he think that by saying he deserves the bad things that are coming his way, we will feel sorry for him?  Not going to happen dumbass.  How did you get so successful, when you’re not that bright?

The woman in the middle of this marriage is Michelle McGee.  She is a tattoo model, and a seriously screwed up chick.  I love tattoos, and have some of my own, but there has got to be trauma of some kind in your life, that would make a woman tattoo her body with images of hate, including her face.  She has “Pray For Us Sinners” tattooed across her forehead.  That is messed up.  You need more than prayers Michelle.

This girl has a Swastika tattooed on her stomach, a “W” and a “P”, inked on her legs, which reportedly stand for “White Power”, and has posed in a Nazi themed photo shoot.  Really Jesse?  Have you lost your mind?  You need to not only apologize for cheating on your wife, but for your choices, which are disgusting beyond just the cheating.

I don’t get why famous men choose to cheat on their wives with such unattractive, and unappealing women.  Tiger slept with hookers, porn stars and skanks.  John Edwards slept with a whore.  Now Jesse James is sleeping with a woman who is scary, and clearly a damaged human being.  Why sacrifice everything, for nothing?

He sat there and smiled, all the while he was having sex with a Nazi loving, tragic, money hungry, skanky, tramp.  For a man who sells himself as being so cool, that is just not cool.  This man has been married twice, has 3 kids from 2 mothers, and is in a custody battle.  Even with all of that baggage, Sandra loved him.  She did not judge him on his past, which is huge.

We don’t know what goes on behind closed doors.  There could be a million reasons that he felt the need to stray outside of his marriage.  What we do know, is that to publicly humiliate a woman, who loves you, is disgusting.  When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.  He has shown you Sandra.

Sandra got married when she was 40, and came to the table with her own history and baggage.  A marriage breaks apart for a lot of reason and perhaps both are to blame.  All I’m saying, is if you love someone enough to marry them, then love them enough to not humiliate them.  Simply walk away, and allow them the opportunity to handle things in a way that is easy for them.  Not only is James an idiot, but he is a coward.

My disgust is based on disappointment.  I believe in marriage and when one is broken, it is sad.  I feel the same way about a high profile couple, as I do about the couple in the corner apartment.  A marriage is special, and to have it is end is unfortunate.  If you are married, and trying to make it work, I wish you well.  Remember that even if you are not in love anymore, you once were.  Respect each other, and keep the faith.

7 Comments — Leave your comment

March 18, 2010 | 1:46 am

We Are Ready For Our Close Up Mr. DeMille

Posted by Ilana Angel

This blog was originally posted in July of 2009.  I received an email this evening from Kay in Denver,  asking me to post it again.  To Kay,  thank you for the lovely email.  You are amazing.  It is a blessing that you have your pictures.  You are in my thoughts and prayers, and I am so sorry for your loss. xo

 

Smile For The Camera

I got divorced when my son was 6 months old.  (It’s a long story for another time.)  While it was a hard decision to end my marriage, it was ultimately the best thing for me, and my son.  It was the best choice because in setting myself free, I was able to be a happy woman, which allowed me to be a happy mom. 

Every situation is different of course, and what worked for me, might not worked for someone else.  My son has grown up with two homes, and has no sense of change or loss, which sometimes happens when you get divorced with older children.

I sometimes look back, and wonder about how my life would have been different, if I had gotten remarried quickly.  I was so focused on being a mom, that it never occurred to me that I should spend time dating, or finding a new relationship.  If I had, maybe I would have had more children.  It’s impossible to know how life might be altered, if choices had been different.

There are a lot of things that are hard about being a single parent.  There are struggles with time, and money.  Having to deal with the other parent, and new partners they may have.  The separating of holidays, plus the stress of going to school and doing homework, all while shuffling back and forth between two locations.

It is very hard for both the children and the parents.  There are so many things, that I can’t pinpoint just one, as the toughest aspect of divorce.  For me, the saddest thing however, about being a single mother, is easy to single out.  It is the pictures. 

I have provided my son with a wonderful life.  We have travelled, and seen things together that are special, and will be memories of a lifetime for my son.  The thing is, there are very few pictures that document us doing them together.  I have boxes full of pictures of my son, and all that he has been blessed to do.  But I took the pictures, so I’m not in any of them.

I am a big picture taker, and when I go through them, I remember so vividly the adventures we have taken together.  In the end though, they are pictures taken by me, of my son, with the occasional one of us together where I asked a stranger to take a shot, or the top of my head as I tried to get one of us together myself.

If I could go back, I would have been more conscious of the fact that I needed to have pictures of us together.  Last night, I went to services at my temple where I was honored by my Sisterhood for the work we did this past year.  I have such lovely pictures of my boy on this special night, but there is not one of us together.  It’s such a shame. 

I’m going to try to break the habit I have, of taking pictures of just him, and focus more on having people take them of us together.  For those single parents who are reading today, do the same.  Stop and ask strangers to capture the moments you have with your children.  You will be so happy you did.

My son will look back on the photos, and remember the trips, laughter, and fun.  I know that he remembers I was there.  They are our memories, and for that I am grateful.  In the end, it’s not necessarily the life I imagined for myself, but in more ways than not, it is the perfect life.  Whether or not I am in the pictures, they are our memories together.

I love my son.  I love every step we’ve taken together, and even though I’m not in the pictures, I was there.  When I see his smiling face looking at me from the photo, both he and I know, the reason he smiles so brightly, is because I am the one holding the camera.

Take a picture of your kids, and when they look at the camera, know that you are there, in the moment, with them.  Sharing, laughing, and keeping the faith.

 

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March 17, 2010 | 7:55 am

Cats, Dogs, Dating and Einstein

Posted by Ilana Angel

Einstein said that doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results, was a sign of insanity.  Well kids, if that is the case, then I am the honorary Mayor of Insanityville. At what point am I going to start paying attention, and doing things differently?  Is it time for a dating reality check?

I date the same type of men, over and over again.  Each time my heart is broken, I vow to date outside of my historical choices, but it is short lived, and I’m right back on the A-Train to Crazyland.  Do we even have the capability to retrain our minds to search for something different?

Yesterday I was with my friend Tom, and we were chatting about my dating life.  We tend to do that a lot.  By chatting, of course I mean, I tell him about my pathetic state of affairs, he feels bad for me, tells me it will be fine, then thanks the heavens he is not single, and kisses his wife.

He generally has good insight, and on rare occasions gives advice I actually listen to.  By listen to, of course I mean I hear what he is saying, try to do it, never quite get it done, then blame him for it not going well, only to have him break me down and admit that I never took the advice to begin with.  This is our pattern.  One I should perhaps change, by actually doing what he suggests.

Tom’s latest theory on my dating life, is that I keep dating men who are cats, not men who are dogs.  Let me just say, I am a little concerned.  Not for Tom, who clearly has lost his mind, but for me, because I think he might be on to something.

Tom loves his dog.  Really loves her.  The dog is cute, and is clearly in love with Tom.  To see the pride he has in his dog, you would think he had given birth to it himself.  I see a plain little black dog, and Tom sees a member of his family, that he would carry for miles across a desert, to get water.  It’s charming how much he loves this animal.

I love my cat.  Really love her.  She is gorgeous, and clearly in love with me.  To hear me talk to her, you would think I was having a conversation with my best friend.  Others may see a little grey cat, but I see a member of my family, that I would carry around in a baby carrier if I could.  Important to note that I totally get how crazy that sounds.  Thanks for checking.

Tom thinks the problem I am having with dating, is that I date men who are like cats.  They are somewhat aloof and indifferent.  They are very sexy and sleek, but affectionate only when it suits them.  They purr, which gives me a false sense of security, and can go days without any contact. 

If I dated a man who was more like a dog, he would want to spend every moment with me, and would make it very clear that we are together.  He would be loyal, and spend a lot of time learning new tricks to impress me.  He would lead the way, and I would not need to always be looking for him. 

Is it just me, or does this actually make sense?  Have I been spending too much time with men who are pussies, instead of seeking out an alpha dog?  Instead of cuddling up to a cat, maybe I need to walk around with a big, strong, aggressive and dominating dog.

I am loyal and fun, which makes me more like a dog than a cat.  Maybe the trick is to simply date my own kind.  The answer may lie in not trying to be the boss, but instead grabbing a leash.  I better not think about it too much, as this analogy could quickly turn, and take on a whole new meaning.  Just saying.

Between Tom and Einstein, I just might be able to get it together, change patterns, and find love.  I will talk it over with my cat, and see what she thinks.  Just kidding!  (Not Really.)  At the end of the day, maybe all I need to do is take a trip to the dog park. Will I find love with Fido?  Perhaps, if I keep the faith.

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