February 26, 2010 | 10:28 am

The View Needs A Jew Barbara Walters

Posted by Ilana Angel

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There is no television show that is in more desperate need of a Jew, than The View.  I like the women who host the show, but lately there has been a gaping hole in what they do.  I have decided that what is missing, is a Jew.

It’s cute when Whoopi says faklempt, and Joy always gets a laugh with kvelling, but I’ve got to draw the line at Elisabeth saying meshugena.  There is diversity in terms of race, age and political parties.  There is the point of view of women who are married, divorced, or living together.  But there is no Jew.

If you stereotype people by their names, you could assume that there are a lot of behind the scenes Jews working at The View.  Truth is, that is the case on most television shows.  Jews are always in the background making things happen, but we don’t really see the face of Jews upfront.

Barbara Walters, I’m your Jew.  I’m a good fit within the group of ladies.  I would rock at hot topics because I am a pop culture, and political junkie.  I’m divorced like Sheri, but unlike the terrific Ms. Shepherd, I date like a maniac in search of love.

I’m funny and irreverent like Joy, and don’t care what people think about me, like Whoopi.  There’s no real similarity between Elisabeth and me, other than the fact that she weighs now, what I weighed in the 2nd grade.  Give me a little time to research it though, and I will come up with something.  It might be made up, but still, it will be something.

It would be an honor and a privilege to sit at the table with the national treasure that is Barbara Walters.  I grew up watching her on television, and used to dream of her interviewing me for her Oscar special.  I like her, and think she and I would hit it off.

Let’s make this happen Bill Geddie.  You could be the first show to officially celebrate “Put A Jew In Front Of The Camera Day”.  I could come on the show, meet a man in NYC, get engaged, and then get married on the show.  Think sweeps baby!

I record The View everyday.  I’m going to watch a little more closely, and start a weekly blog incorporating my voice into the show.  The View Needs A Jew will become a regular feature on Keeping The Faith, until Mr. Geddie contacts me to come and sit on the panel.

It’s not a huge commitment Bill.  I just want to do it one time.  One day, sitting at the table, with my own mug, chatting with the ladies.  I will be a very romantic perspective, which is one that you are lacking.  You are missing not only a Jewish point of view, but also the perspective of a woman who believes in love and will search until she finds it.

So…. here we go.  Let’s bring a Jew to the View!  I am on a mission to make it happen.  Joy is close, but just because her boyfriend is a Jew, she is not.  Whoopi is a Goldberg, close but not quite there.  I am a bona fide Jew my darling ladies, so let’s go. 

I am going to take a moment to enjoy the view, while I’m waiting to enjoy The View.  I’m watching everyday, keeping up to date on hot topics, and keeping the faith.

February 25, 2010 | 7:46 am

The Bachelor Flirting School, A Lesbian Proposition and A Bad Date

Posted by Ilana Angel

I will never understand men.  At some point I might just need to give up, because I fear it is just never going to happen for me.  I have a better chance of understanding my son’s 8th grade advanced algebra, than men, and trust me when I tell you, that will NEVER happen.

I went out for coffee with the guy from the oil change.  Here is a recap of the one of the best parts of our tantalizing conversation:

Him:  How long have you been divorced?
Me:  Years
Him:  Are your boobs real?
Me:  I beg your pardon?
Him:  Do you want to go to my place?
Me:  Are you for real right now?
Him:  Do you like to watch porn?
Me:  I‘m really sorry but I need to go.
Him:  Can you come out to my car for a minute?

We won’t be seeing each other anymore, and by not seeing him again, of course I mean I would rather rupture my own spleen with a letter opener, than see this man again.  I seriously thought I was on some hidden camera dating show.  Never again.

I had a doctor’s appointment yesterday to desperately figure out a way to live with a cat I love, but am allergic to.  I’m in the waiting area playing around on my iPhone,  not paying attention to anything around me.  The door opens so I look up.  A man comes in who is covered with tattoos. I catch myself staring, and look away.  As I turn away, I see a cute girl staring at me.

I assume she has also seen tattoo man and is giving me the “Did you just see that?” look.  I smile back with my “I totally saw him, how bizarre” look.  She makes some comment about the weather, and I make a joke about how nobody but me knows how to drive in the rain.

We start chatting and she comes over and introduces herself and we start talking about the heartache of being allergic to my cat.  She is listening, and being supportive, when all of a sudden she puts her hand on my arm and gives it a little squeeze.

I am thinking to myself that it was an oddly intimate touch. I’m being ridiculous, and start laughing at myself in my head, when she asks me for my number.  Really?  I seriously cannot tell when someone is a) flirting with me, or b) gay.  I panic for a split second, then shake it off.

I asked her is she is asking me for my number in a “go on a date” kind of way, and she said yes.  She thought I was cute and funny, and wanted to hang out and talk more.  Let me tell you, I was so incredibly flattered, that I leaned over and hugged her.

Whether you are gay or straight, and regardless of whether the person hitting on you is gay or straight, there are some days when it does not matter who is hitting on you, because it’s more important that you are being hit on at all.  Thank you for hitting on me Karen!

It really just made my day.  I am horrible at picking up the signs of someone hitting on me.  More horrendous than that, I am a disastrous flirter.  I just don’t know how to do it.  I am open and uninhibited, so people think I am constantly flirting, when really I’m just being myself.

I remember I was at a party once with about 20 couples, a sprinkle of gay men, and single me.  I made my way through the party, saying hello and chatting with everyone, and had a very nice time.  The next day the hostess told me all the wives thought I was flirting with their husbands.

At first I was mortified.  I would never flirt with someone’s man, and felt horrible that they would think poorly of me, but after I thought about it for a minute, I was thrilled!  They thought I was flirting!  I was happy to be considered a flirt at all, when I suck at it so bad.

What is so interesting, is that if those women had met me on their own, they would have said to their husbands that they met a fantastic girl who was the life of the party.  But since the husbands were there, seeing how fabulous I was, it became threatening.

Karen hitting on me, and that party, were essentially the same thing.  I felt bad someone was hurt, but at the same time, my ego was stroked.  I love Karen for taking a shot, and love the insecure and clingy women for thinking I had a shot with their husbands.

Here is a brilliant idea!  The women of The Bachelor should open a flirting school to extend their 15 minutes of fame.  The chicks on there are master flirters, and I could use the lessons.  Here is a list of classes that could be offered:

“How To Seduce A Man”, by Rozlyn
“How to Manipulate a Man Into Thinking You’re an Angel”, by Ali. 
“It’s Been A Long Time, But I Can Flirt Again”, by Tenley
“What Not To Do At A Party”, by Vienna
“How To Become A Lonely Cat Lady”, by Michelle
“How To Stop Drinking Before It Gets Messy”, by Christine

I am telling you Mike Fleiss, this could be huge.  This is the perfect next step in The Bachelor Empire that you are creating.  Remember who gave you the idea when the classes are sold out, and you are counting all your money!

I cannot look at my life and say that it is not interesting.  A little strange, and sometimes complicated, but never boring.  When I meet the man of my dreams, he will look at these blogs, understand me a little better, and hopefully love me a little more. 

It will happen one day.  I need to just relax, and keep the faith.

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February 24, 2010 | 11:11 am

The Olympics Get Weird, American Idol Fails & The Bachelor Conspiracy Theory

Posted by Ilana Angel

Does anyone else think the ice dancing teams that are made up of brothers and sisters are a little weird?  Every time I see them in an embrace, or the guy holding the girl in a sensual position, I think about The Cutting Edge and it creeps me out.

It’s hilarious to hear the announcers describe a couple that is married or dating.  They speak about how romantic it is, and that you can see their love, and feel the connection.  Then when it’s a brother and sister, they get kind of awkward because they can’t talk about it the same way, because that would be strange.

There are so many hours of practice involved to even get to the Olympics, that I can only imagine how many times those brothers are sliding their sisters bodies down their own during the lifts.  I find it odd, and I would not want my kids to be partners.

I totally get that it’s easier to have only one practice schedule, in terms of schlepping the kids around, and I support anything that makes a mother’s life easier.  That said, it’s weird and surely there must be enough ice dancers in the world that you don’t need to partner with your sibling.  I’m just saying.

I thought that the switch to 4 judges last year on American Idol made no sense, and now I’m even more certain that it does not work.  They never should of let Paula go, and for me, the show is dying a slow and painful death.

I love Ellen, but she makes no sense on the judging panel.  I don‘t understand how it is that she is qualified to give an opinion on the careers of young singers.  Last night was the first live show, and there was just no flow.  It was off, and I didn’t think the girl singers were that great.

Do we really need to hear four people tell these kids that they are pitchy?  They all said the same thing.  Ellen seemed nervous and awkward, and I found myself really missing Paula, and resenting Kara for ruining what was a great thing.  Don’t even get me started on Ryan Seacrest.

I think the only person on the planet who may like Ryan less than me, is Brian Dunkelman.  I cannot wrap my head around how this guy is so successful.  He is cocky and silly, and where I once though he had a certain charm, that is gone.  He’s annoying, and brings nothing to the show.

I think the men’s group tonight will be better than the girls were.  I will continue to watch because it’s a show that my kid digs, but I’m kind of over it.  I will follow Simon to his new show, and I’m really hoping that Paula will be a judge on the X Factor.  She is missed on television.

I blogged about the Women Tell All Bachelor Special yesterday.  Let me just say, Oh.  My.  God.  People sure do have strong opinions about this show.  Not since I wrote about how I wanted Aaron Carter voted off of Dancing with The Stars, has a fan club so quickly come to defense of their hero.  People who love Ali, really love Ali.

These chicks are mean, which makes sense, since they idolize a mean girl.  They were very fast to come to her defense when I called her a lying celebrity wannabe.  It not only made me laugh, but also solidified my decision to not watch the next season if Ali is the Bachelorette.

The best emails I got were to share a conspiracy theory that I had not heard before.  Apparently there is a rumor that the man that Rozlyn was making out with was, get ready for it, JAKE!  I got emails saying that they had snuck away and were making out, and the show needed to end it, as it was really early in the season and would ruin the entire show if it got out.

They say the producer who was fired, was a scapegoat and got a nice buy out to walk away from the show.  I suppose it could be true.  It would get Rozlyn off the hook for lying, and for swearing on the life of her son.  It would also explain why we have not heard anything from the producer.

If you think back to all the episodes, and look at them with this theory in your mind, it actually makes sense.  How fabulous if it were true.  The thing is, if I got a dollar for every conspiracy theory about this show, I would be rich.  People sure do have a lot of time on their hands.

I’m a fan of The Bachelor.  Never miss an episode, and am convinced that love can be found this way.  You have got to be a Super Fan however, to spend your time coming up with conspiracy theories about what is happening and why.  It cracks me up, and only makes my crush on Mike Fleiss stronger.  I love you Mr. Fleiss.

I have a date tonight.  We met last weekend at the car dealership when I was getting an oil change.  He seemed like a nice guy, so I agreed to meet for a drink after work.  I am really trying.  Thinking outside the box, staying open to finding love in unexpected places, trying to trust myself, and always keeping the faith.

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February 23, 2010 | 12:11 pm

The Bachelor Women Tell All – Translation 101

Posted by Ilana Angel

The greatest love experiment on television is coming to the end of another season.  Last night, the Women Tell All special aired as this week’s installment of The Bachelor.  Next week, Jake will wrap it all up with the most dramatic final rose ceremony in history!

I don’t know about you, but I was a little bored last night.  There was an awful lot of recapping.  I feel like it was a big flashback dream, and I invested a lot of time, for very little payback.  That said, I love this show and whatever they need to do, to fill two hours, they have my blessing.

I was at the taping of the Women Tell All special.  It took hours of filming, and lot’s of what we saw ended up on the cutting room floor.  I must say though, they did a good job of editing because most of what they cut, was repetitious and not that interesting.

They began by showing a bunch of bachelor/bachelorette cast reunions.  Who knew these even existed?  If it is any indication of what The Bachelor Pad show will be like this summer, we can look forward to seeing tons of naked bodies, drunken rants, and regrettable sex.

We are then shown how the cast members of seasons past, help to give back by donating their time to charity.  To be honest, I did not remember half the people who they featured, but that’s not important.  What’s key, is that they are helping.  If their pretending to be famous for a little while longer, gives them the motivation to help those less fortunate, then bravo.

I would like to provide a translation of what we saw last night.  With the end fast approaching, let’s break it down so people will be better able to understand what everyone is really saying.  I am an expert in the language of “Bachelorese”, so please allow me to bring it all together.

Gia is the first to sit down with Chris Harrison.  She says that she may not act or seem insecure, but she is probably the most insecure girl there.  Translation:  Even she does not get how pretty she is and if she did, it would have been a whole other ball game.

I had a chance to speak with Gia last week, and ask some questions.  Let me just say, this is a really lovely girl.  She is articulate, bright and charming.  I asked her about her insecurity, because it’s hard to imagine a girl who is so pretty, could feel bad about herself.

She said that her dream would be to use her new found celebrity to help junior high and high school girls who are struggling with bullying, mean girls and insecurity.  She is the classic ugly duckling turned swan, and that she wants to help others who are like she was, is admirable.

I really like this girl.  She was a lady in the house, she befriended Vienna when no one else would, and she was classy when she got the boot.  I still think her laugh and accent would grate on my nerves after a while, but this is truly a wonderful girl and I hope good things happen for her.

Michelle is up next.  She is a freak and I love her.  I could talk about her forever.  If Mike Fleiss wants to be really brave, then they should make her the next Bachelorette.  She is angry and bitter, which makes for great television.

Michelle said she does not need a therapist, and is very stable.  Translation:  There is no amount of therapy that can help her, so why bother wasting time or money on therapy.  Unless the therapist is super hot, then she would go and be full on Fatal Attraction.  Michelle should go on Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew for her addiction to love.

The hot seat now belongs to Ali.  Let me just say that I do not like this girl.  I think she is a liar and a celebrity wannabe.  by wannabe, of course I mean she is working really hard to be the next Bachelorette.  I know she is America’s sweetheart, but come on people.  This is the most manipulative woman of the entire season.

I had an opportunity to talk with Ali last week also, and this chick is bad news.  I asked her if she felt any responsibility for the bad press that Vienna was getting, since she helped paint her in such a bad light.  She managed to lie her way through her answer.

She said it was a tough question to answer.  Translation:  She needs a minute to pull an answer out of her butt. She said it would make her sad if she was a part of hurting Vienna, because that’s definitely not something she’d ever want to instigate.  Translation:  Crap, if this backfires and I don’t get to be the Bachelorette I’m going to be annoyed.  I better start apologizing right away.

She went on to say that she regrets the things she said, but that we didn’t see the whole story.  First she was apologizing, then saying it was the editing, then saying she was trying to help Vienna.  This chick is a liar, and on a mission to be the Bachelorette.  I do not get why people are fans of hers.  She is a mean girl, and karma is a bitch, so she needs to watch her back.

Ali is the silver medal winner in the fake crying Olympics.  She almost got a gold, but Jake won by a tear.  I don’t believe anything this girl says.  She is her own PR machine, and is saying all the right things to ingratiate herself to America, so she can be the next Bachelorette.

Look away from the light people!  She is a fraud.  Do not fall for it.  She should NOT be the Bachelorette.  She had her chance at love and walked away.  Why should she get a do-over?  She needs to go back to work, and get over it.  Her 15 minutes of fame need to be wrapped up.

She says that if Vienna is watching, she wants to tell her she is sorry, and to be strong.  Translation:  Sorry I was so horrible to you Vienna, but whatever, I’m going to be the next Bachelorette, which is why I came on the show in the first place, so I win.  This chick is disgusting.

This brings us to the skanky whore portion of the programming.  Rozlyn.  Bravo to her for coming back.  I’m thinking she was contractually obligated, and not thrilled to be there, but whatever.  She is the best train wreck ever, and was the part of the show I was most looking forward to.

There were two things said by Rozlyn at the taping, that I thought were important.  I decided that if the show edited out these two things, I was not going to watch anymore.  I get that “reality” television is not that real, but if they left them out, they were full of crap and I was done.

This was the only part that I cared about for the entire two hours, so now I’m waiting to see if Mike Fleiss is making a show about finding love, or assuming the audience is stupid, and manipulating us to see only what wants us to see, not the truth.

Item #1:  Rozlyn said that she swore on her son’s life that she never kissed the producer.  Translation:  I am a disgusting, filthy, skanky whore and I just lied on my son’s life, which means that my lies are more important than the well being of my son.  I would NEVER say such a thing, nor would any normal mother.  I feel so sad for her little boy.

That statement by Rozlyn was one of the deal breakers for me that needed to make it into the show.  This was important because if they took it out, they were restricting how we view Rozlyn, or somehow protecting her, and she did not deserve the protection.  This woman is crazy.

Item #2:  Rozlyn accuses Chris Harrison of hitting on the wife of the Producer she was fooling around with in New Zealand.  Important to note that we learned not only was she having an inappropriate sexual affair with a staffer on the show, but he was married.  She is so classy.

I think it’s impressive that they showed this statement by Rozlyn.  They could have easily taken it out and no one would have known.  It speaks volumes about the integrity of both Chris Harrison and Mike Fleiss, that it made it to air.  It was a disgusting thing for Rozlyn to say, but I suppose when she was desperate, and drowning under her own lies, it was easy to be disgusting.

It’s time now for a few minutes with Jake.  I want to take a moment to say that I think Jake is the worse actor ever.  He is full of crocodile tears, and every time he wipes a fake tear from his eye, I want to start screaming.  He is always saying that his heart was crying.  Translation:  If I can get a tear out now, I think I can land a gig on General Hospital.

Oh.  My.  God.  We are now forced to watch both Ali, AND Jake, fake cry.  I want to pluck out my own eyes just so it will stop.  They show a blooper real at this moment, and I can’t even watch it because the fake crying has made my eyes bleed.  I missed the whole thing.

In the end, we got about 10 minutes of good television, hidden within two hours of fluff, but I don’t care.  I love this show and I’m looking forward to the finale next week.  It will be interesting to see if all the spoilers we are hearing about are true, or if Jake surprises us all with an unexpected decision.

I can’t wait to see how it all plays out.  I hope Jake picks Vienna, and Tenley gets to be be the next Bachelorette, so she can finally get over her ex-husband.  As for who they actually pick to be the bachelorette, I don’t really care, as long as it’s NOT Ali.

All I can do is trust that Mike Fleiss sees that she is an inherently mean girl, and does not deserve the opportunity.  Call me Mike Fleiss and I will explain it all to you.  You trust me, and in turn, I will keep the faith.

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February 22, 2010 | 11:07 am

The Olympics, The Bachelor, and Keeping Up With The Kardashians

Posted by Ilana Angel

I love watching the Olympics.  I am pulling for Team USA of course, but my Canadian heart wants Canada to win everything!  It was a great weekend of highs and lows, and I cannot believe how late I am staying up to watch.  Especially since I could easily watch online during normal hours.

I was very emotional watching the brother/sister team of Roman and Alexandra Zaretski in the ice dancing competition.  As an Israeli born Jew, who moved to Canada as a child, it was a moment of incredible pride.  To see them dance on a world stage to Hava Nagila was magical.  Yay for Israel.

It would be amazing to have the ice dancing medals go to Canada, USA and Israel.  What a trip that would be.  I wish them all well tonight, and can’t wait to watch.  My prayers and best wishes go out to Joannie Rochette and her family.  I hope she does well tomorrow, and I am in awe of her strength.

As for the hockey game between the USA and Canada last night, come on boys.  The USA came in talking trash, and the Canadians had an unearned sense of entitlement.  They were playing like it was an opportunity for another miracle on ice, not a game that had no medal at stake.  It was a great game, but let’s hope they all grow up in time to fight for gold.

I want to know why it is that everyone at NBC refers to everything hockey as “Ice” hockey.  It’s the winter Olympics people, we know it is being played on ice.  I don’t believe roller hockey is played at the WINTER OLYMPICS.  Shut up already with the ice.  I love this game and hopes Canada takes Gold!

Tonight is “Women Tell All” night on The Bachelor.  I was at the taping of this special and it is explosive.  It will be interesting to see how they cut down hours of taping, into a 2 hour special.  We will see the return of this years skanky whore, Rozlyn, and it is awesome!

You are going to love the part where she comes back to talk to Chris Harrison.  This chick is crazy and I can’t wait to talk about it tomorrow!  I’ve been a good girl and kept quiet, but it airs tonight and tomorrow, the gloves are coming off because I’ve got a lot to say!

I think Tenley should be the next Bachelorette.  She deserves to be happy and find love.  Jake is not the man for her, and she should be praying that he does not pick her, so she can be the Bachelorette, and find the right guy. 

It will be entertaining to watch the girl who has only been with one man, make out with the masses.  She will go from Disney princess, to Bachelorette whore, in a matter of weeks.  THAT will be good television.

I cannot explain why, but I love the Kardashian family.  They are fascinating.  Never before has such a large group of people been rich and famous for absolutely no reason.  This is a very entertaining and attractive bunch, and I’m hooked.

To be clear, it’s an interesting show to watch, but there is no way that a movie needs to be made about these people.  Are you kidding me?  There is seriously a movie about their lives being planned.  We already know EVERYTHING about them, so why a movie?

Kourtney needs to dump her baby daddy.  This guy is a lying, cheating loser.  I feel so sad when she defends him.  I get that she has a new baby, and wants to give him a family, but she is better off alone.  She has a ton of support and help, and this guy is toxic.

Khloe scored when she married big.  She went from being known as the least attractive sister, to being the Laker wife, in a matter of weeks.  Good for her.  She loves her sisters and I hope she is happy.  I like that she is not afraid to say what she is thinking, even when it gets her in trouble.

Kim is truly stunning.  She has managed to take her one talent, looking beautiful, and turned it into a business.  Not since Ryan Seacrest, has someone created such a huge career out of nothing.  Makes sense Ryan produces her show, as they have so much in common.

Kris Jenner works hard, and I give her credit for taking her family to this level.  It’s impressive that she has kept Bruce Jenner in the news 34 years after he won gold.  She is good at what she does, and clearly loves her children. 

Not sure how much she loves herself however, when she allows her children to talk to her like they do.  There is no respect there, and I would not allow it from my kid.  Those kids have careers because of her, and they should be a little more respectful and kind to their mom.

It’s going to be a good week.  I have 2 dates lined up from an online dating site.  I am trying something new, as I have vowed to stay away from a certain “Jewish” dating site, which operates in a very un-kosher way, so wish me luck. 

I will meet you back here tomorrow to talk about The Bachelor.  Good luck to the Olympians who are competing today.  To Kim Kardashian, who thinks Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas will play Kris and Bruce Jenner in her movie, have another drink, and keep the faith.

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February 19, 2010 | 10:52 am

The Bachelor’s Cinderella, Tiger Woods, and The Doctor

Posted by Ilana Angel

THE DOCTOR:  I had a date last night.  He is a podiatrist, 52, divorced with 3 young adult children.  It was a lovely date.  We went for dinner and spent a couple of hours together.  Our conversation was fluid and easy.  He is a nice looking man, not what I am normally attracted to, but nice looking.

I am searching for love.  I am mature and evolved enough to know that the man I will spend my life with, may not look as I imagine.  I want a man who is funny and kind.  The most important thing to me is that he be Jewish.  It’s the one thing I won’t let go of.

The thing is, I don’t think I should have to let it go.  It’s my faith and belief system.  Judaism shapes my worldview.  The podiatrist is a wonderful man.  He was raised Jewish but is currently an atheist.  I believe in God.  Not only do I believe in God, but he is ever present in my life.

I won’t be going out with the podiatrist again.  There is a difference that is simply too big for me to overlook.  People have a lot of opinions about my decision to only date within my faith.  It’s cool.  In the end, the new man in my life may not be Jewish.  He will however, believe in God.

CINDERELLA: I got an email yesterday from a reader named Patty. She wrote the following:  Vienna reminds me of Cinderella.  Living with all the mean stepsisters, aka Ali, Corrie, Tenley.  She is picked on and ganged up on. They are afraid that the prince (Jake) will fall in love with her, so they make a pact to make sure she doesn’t get the glass slipper (rose).  We know how the story ends right?  The prince (Jake) falls in love with Cinderella (Vienna) and they live happily ever after.

Bravo Patty.  I think that is best analogy about the show that I have heard.  Vienna is totally Cinderella, and I hope the outcome is the same for her, as it is in the fairytale.  In the end, I don’t really care about this group as much as I have for other seasons. 

I was at the taping of The Women Tell All Special and I’m curious about how they will edit down 7 hours of taping, into a 2 hour special.  At the end of that show I will either love The Bachelor more, or have no respect for the process.  Will they show what really happened, or edit it into something else?  I’m ready for it to be over and move onto The Bachelor Pad.

TIGER WOODS:  I just did not get the news conference.  He was all over the place.  He talked about a million things and seemed unfocused to me.  I was so hoping we would see Tiger speaking with humility.  In the end he was came across as arrogant and angry.

I believe he is sorry.  I would have believed him more however, if he took questions.  When he looked into the camera and seemed to speak directly to his wife, his desperation was palpable.  In the end, I wanted him to take responsibility, which he did, but he lost focus, and it came across as very ego driven.  I can’t wait to see the skit that is undoubtedly coming from Saturday Night Live.

I feel bad for Tiger Woods.  I really do.  I think he is sorry.  Sorry that he did what he did, but even more sorry that he got caught.  It was weird that he went to hug people after he spoke, then just turned around and left.  I find myself more annoyed with him now, than I was before the press conference.

He has small children and I appreciate that he is trying to save his marriage, and get help for whatever his issues are.  The thing is, when someone shows you who they are, you must believe them the first time.  Tiger is a cheater and as long as he has an ego, he will continue to be a cheater.

If Elin were my friend, or my sister, I would tell her to not take him back.  She should forgive him, give him access to children, support him as her friend, and the father of her children.  She should not however, be his wife.  She deserves better.

It’s been an interesting week of reality television.  The Bachelor, Survivor, The Real Housewives of Orange County, Project Runway and The Tiger Woods Experiment.  I love reality television but I can’t watch them all, so I will dump The Tiger Woods Show off of my playlist.  It will go into the reality television pile of crap I’ve started, along with Patti Stanger and the disaster that is Millionaire Matchmaker.

I send my condolences to Adir Vered’s family and friends on their heartbreaking loss.  Love your kids, keep them safe, and count your blessings.  Shabbat Shalom, have a wonderful weekend, and keep the faith.

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February 18, 2010 | 10:41 am

What Is Tiger Woods Apologizing For?

Posted by Ilana Angel

Tiger Woods is going to make a statement of apology tomorrow for his behavior.  Is he apologizing for all the sex he had?  Is apologizing for cheating on his wife?  If he were not married,  would all the sex not be an issue?  You can sleep with whoever you want if you’re not married.

I think that Tiger Woods is a pig.  I don’t know anything about him, his wife, or his life, but I still think he is a pig.  He put his wife and children at risk.  He did not simply cheat on his spouse, and break his marriage vows, he violated his wife by breaking the rules of common decency.

The situation with Tiger Woods brings up a lot of questions.  One could ask if monogamy is something that simply does not make sense in terms of human nature.  If you are married, have a friendship, love and respect for each other, can you sleep with other people and have it not matter?

Can we ever separate out sex from love?  Mrs. Woods had all the benefits of being married to a man like Tiger.  She has multiple homes, is able to stay home with her children, travel wherever she wants, and buy whatever she desires.  Is that not enough?  Does sex have to be a part of the deal?

If she never found out would her life be better off?  He was clearly cheating on her, but did she need to know?  I think so.  People cheat on their partners all the time, no one finds out, and life goes on.  What is unforgiveable about Tiger’s behavior is not that he cheated, it’s that he was reckless with lives other than his own.  When he endangered her and their kids, is when she deserved to know.

I think it’s sad that he needs to create a news conference to apologize for his behavior.  I think it’s stupid that he is not taking questions and simply making a statement.  Is he going to golf again and thinks if he says sorry, he will be forgiven and can go on with his life?

The thing is, what he has done has nothing to do with his golfing.  He is the greatest golfer the sport has ever seen.  That he is a sex addict does not change that.  Just because you are a pig in your personal life, does not mean you are a pig professionally.

I lost respect for Mr. Woods as a husband and a father, not as a golfer.  I think it’s a shame that people cannot see the difference between the two.  I have blogged about Tiger Woods two other times and got a lot of feedback about my opinion.  You can see those two entries at the links below.

www.jewishjournal.com/keepingthefaith/item/tiger_woods_is_a_pig_20091218/

www.jewishjournal.com/keepingthefaith/item/tiger_woods_part_2_20091221/

The Tiger Woods scandal has really made me think about marriage, love and sex.  I am almost 44, divorced and have a child.  Clearly I have engaged in sex.  At what point do we get to own our sexuality?  Sex is an important part of an adult life, yet we are not really allowed to talk about it, and it ruins a lot of otherwise great relationships.

How important a role does sex play in a marriage?  If women were better able to separate love from sex, would it make for more successful marriages?  Statistically, less than 3% of all mammals on the planet are monogamous.  Why do we assume that humans are a part of that group?

I did a Google search of monogamy and it turns out humans are not really made to be monogamous.  Sex is this huge part of our lives, but perhaps has been assigned too much value.  It turns out that love and sex are two completely different things, yet we teach that they are one and the same.

When I was young, I was taught that you should love who you are having sex with.  I think I have actually used those words when speaking about sex with my own child.  I want him to hold off on sex until he is old enough to respect and appreciate not only what it is, but who he is doing it with.

I think sex is a great thing and I understand it so much more now than I ever did in the past.  I like to think I am evolved enough to be able to differentiate sex from love, and if I was cheated on I could overcome it. However, the fact is that when I was asked to forgive cheating, I could not do it.  I’m not as evolved as I like to think I am.

I’m curious to hear what Tiger has to say.  I can’t imagine it will change my opinion in terms of his golfing or his marriage.  At the end of the day who cares?  His actions do not change my life in any way, and ultimately will not change how I look at love or sex.

I wonder what sex will be like when my son is old enough to marry.  At some point will monogamy not be a requirement in a marriage?  When you look at how much the world changes with each generation, it is possible that his generation will embrace love and sex as two different things?

I believe in love, sex, and monogamy.  I believe it is possible to find all three things in one relationship, and will continue to search for the one person who can give me everything.  I will find him as long as I continue to hope, believe, pray and keep the faith.

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February 17, 2010 | 11:26 am

The Bachelor Reality:  Good, Bad and Ugly

Posted by Ilana Angel

I love this show and have watched it since the first season, when The Bachelor, Alex Michel, was gay.  (Not dating men gay, but dating women when he should have been dating men gay.)  Not since the second season when Bachelorette Trista picked Ryan, has there been a true home run.  Others have found love of course, but Trista and Ryan are the ones who showed that the experiment could work.

There have been seasons where I actually yelled at the television when wrong decisions were made.  This show has made me laugh and cry.  At the end of the day, I suppose I watch it because there is an element of train wreck that I just can’t look away from.  I watch a lot of reality television, but a large part of why I watch this particular show, is because I believe in love.  I believe in love and support any path that people take to find it. 

In the early seasons, it was easy to believe that people went on to find love because the show was new, and the idea that it could make you famous was a stretch.  That is not the case now.  A lot of the people who go on this show, are there to get famous, not find love.  While I understand their goals, it’s disappointing, but more than that, it’s entertaining.  If I were in my early twenties, and wanted to shake things up, this show would do the trick.

I blogged that I think Jake should select Vienna this season, and I got a lot of flack.  I also wrote that I think Ali is a fame hungry, skanky, liar, and got flack for that too.  Come on people, it’s a television show.  It’s not even real television, it’s fantasy, I mean reality television.  It’s fascinating how people get so invested in the lives of these strangers.  I’m not judging, or pointing fingers, because I do the same thing.

THE GOOD: Tenley is too good for Jake.  They have nothing in common.  She is infatuated with him, for reasons that are understandable.  She is gun shy and trying to put herself out there following her divorce, and good for her.  Tenley is the girl who most deserves to find love, but she will not find it with Jake.  She should be the new Bachelorette and find the perfect match, rather than settle for the one bachelor that gets to do the picking.

THE BAD:  Jake started out as the All-American good guy, and over the course of the season, has become a bit of a pig.  He talks about morals and yet does not seem to really have any.  He fake cries, and there is certain insincerity to what he says.  He manipulated both Gia and Corrie in my opinion. I feel like he says what he thinks the audience wants to hear.  I feel bad for him because I don’t believe he knew what he was getting himself into.  He started off good, and went bad.

THE UGLY: How is it that Ali is America’s sweetheart?  This girl is horrible.  She has been mean spirited and petty from the beginning.  She was a frontrunner and when she saw that Vienna was going to be competition, she began bashing her.  We never saw Vienna say or do anything mean spirited, yet Ali says she is a bad person and everyone agrees. To make her the Bachelorette would be rewarding her for playing unfair. 

THE REALITY: Vienna is a nice girl.  We are learning through the tabloids that she has made some bad decisions, but let’s remember that she is 23 years old.  That is really young, and we all made mistakes when we were her age.  Well I didn’t, but a lot of people do. I feel sorry for Vienna.  She has been attacked from the very first moment she arrived and it’s too bad because I think Jake loves her and his watching the show play out, may change his mind.

Love makes people do crazy things.  Even if it’s not really love, but you think it is, it makes you do crazy things.  I will keep watching this show.  I will watch, invest and pull for my favorites.  I will continue to blog my take on it, and therefore piss people off.  I can be sarcastic, snarky and opinionated.  At the end of the day however, I am a romantic and I watch because love is all around us and sometimes we need to look in odd places to find it.

I don’t know what Jake will do, but whatever it is, I hope he is happy.  I like him.  We will never understand what it feels like to go through this experience.  He has been a good Bachelor and I hope there are no regrets.  To the ladies, I cannot imagine that the tabloid scrutiny, including opinionated bloggers, writing about your past is worth it.  All you can do in the end is believe that you will find love.  Believe, and keep the faith.

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