October 4, 2012
Real Housewives of NYC Finale Snooze
I have been watching this season with very limited interest. I didn’t pay close enough attention to blog it, but I watched, and drank, and was thoroughly disgusted. They tried to revamp the show with three new cast members but it didn’t work. As the season ends, none of the new ladies proved to be good television, and the three original hags were simply hags.
There is still a reunion to watch, and I will, but let’s be very clear: The Real Housewives of New York City is not a good show, the cast is not interesting, and I watch to mock. I am not invested in the ladies or the stories. It is not even a train wreck, simply bad television. Bravo is scraping the bottom of the barrel and coming up with crap.
The big finish starts with Carole having a ping-pong event to raise money. This chick is in serious need of a bra, a stylist, and an Orthodontist. Aviva turns up and says she hopes Ramona is not coming. She is pissed with Ramona because she kicked her dad out of her party. Really? George was not invited to the party, and I would have kicked him out too.
Countless arrives and I could care less. She stayed one season to long in my opinion. Last year she was entertaining as she fell in love, but now she is a whore who cheats on her boyfriend, sleeps with strangers, has a weird relationship with her kids, and appears to be manlier with each episode. I have lost all respect for her, which was not a lot.
Tension is in the air as Ramona arrives. George goes to hug Mario, which is weird. Ramona is yelling at Mario to distract him from George, and it’s beyond lame. Carole gives a speech about her late husband and I am zoned out. I really just don’t care and if there is no big fight between Aviva and Ramona, it is a complete waste of my time. Who are these people?
Heather wins the ping-pong tournament and is very pleased with herself. I did not get her in the beginning and I really like her now. She is not good television, but she is real and fun. Important to note that it is her being real that makes her bad for reality television. There is no room for honest and kind people on this train! We want dysfunctional bitches.
Aviva is still talking about Ramona. All Aviva talks about is Ramona, her dad, her fake leg, and her neuroses. She is disgusting and needs to get off of my television. She is not a nice person, has serious mental issues, and needs some medication. Heather goes over and tells Aviva she needs to stop. I love me some Heather. Save yourself Heather! Quit!
Heather invites Sonja to see the results of her photo shoot. We have been hearing about this toaster oven for years and I’m over it. I do not use a toaster oven, will not buy this toaster oven, and even if I do, the box is going in the garbage so who cares about the box? We leave Sonja and Heather and head over to Carole. She started off strong, but is now a mess.
Carole is giving herself a book party and rips off an idea from Sex and the City. Perhaps she fancies herself as a Carrie Bradshaw type. No. Not working. She wrote a book. Mazel Tov. Move on. Aviva goes to see Heather as she has been asked to walk in her fashion show. Aviva is nervous about showing her leg, but she is going to do it anyway. Aviva is a tool.
Sidebar: If Yummie Tummie is a shape wear company, why feature models that have either no shape, or great shapes? Aviva needs a sandwich, with mayo, not a tummy shaper. It was disappointing to me that none of the models are shapely. Skinny bitches in control top panties make me laugh. By laugh of course I am drinking, so not sure why I am laughing.
Aviva is nervous about her leg, and Heather assures her that her faults are what make her fabulous. Not sure calling a fake leg a fault is cool, but whatever. Aviva needs to think about it. By think about it of course she means she is totally going to do it, just wants to make sure she is the star and not just the hired help. She agrees to show her fake leg in the show.
Aviva is now going to change the show. She does not want to wear the jacket that has been assigned to her, and she wants to wear her hair differently from everyone else. Important to note that Aviva drinks her water in the same way Taylor eats cotton candy. She is blowing her bottle and it’s hilarious. It is painfully clear why I have not been blogging this nightmare.
Sonja is talking to her toaster oven photographer, Ramona is dumping all over him, and not paying attention to the show. Aviva walks and opts to take off the jacket that Heather insisted that she wear. Total bitch move. Then when Heather is walking the runway as the designer, Aviva tries to steal the spotlight again. Seriously people, Aviva Drescher is horrible.
A completely wasted moment was the appearance of violinist Miri Ben-Ari. Miri is an Israeli who is remarkable. She is talented, beautiful and really lovely. They did not mention her, did not let us hear her play without bitches talking over her, and it was a real shame. I suggest you all look up the “hip hop violinist” on YouTube and see what a great musician she is.
Ramona is bullying Sonja into thinking exactly like she wants her to think. She calls Heather over and Heather is not having it. She loses it, which is fantastic. She calls Sonja an ungrateful ass and kicks her out of the show. Sonja backpedals a little and sucks up, but whatever. Heather needs to cut her losses and get away from this show. What a mess.
The gang of skanks is at Carole’s book party. There is tension between Ramona and Heather. But Ramona tries to be civil. Heather goes after her and it’s sad. She is a professional and this show has made her a high school mean girl. Ramona apologizes, is hammered, and Heather is a bitch. Understandable, but still, not the right time or place. No good comes from this show.
Aviva comes over and attacks Ramona. She is screaming that she should be ashamed for throwing her dad out of the party. Ramona walks away, Sonja is acting like best friends with Heather, and Heather is confused by how crazy the women are. This show is pathetic, these women are pathetic, the storylines are pathetic, and Bravo is pathetic.
Another party is ruined and I am drunk again. Everyone is yelling when Aviva kicks Ramona out of Carole’s party, telling her she is not welcome. Really? Aviva goes on to say the only reason to kick her father out is if he stole something, or raped someone. Seriously? This woman is unstable and none of that can be blamed on editing.
The show ends with Sonja drooling over director Joel Schumacher. Sad. The reunion should be interesting. Of course should be does not mean that it will be. I don’t get these chicks and am confused by Bravo. They took a brilliant idea and have sucked all the joy out of it. The truth is that only bringing back Alex McCord and Jill Zarin will help this show keep it real.
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