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September 3, 2013

Real Housewives of New Jersey Spa Therapy

http://www.jewishjournal.com/blog/item/real_housewives_of_new_jersey_spa_therapy/

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We are still in Arizona.  I’m not sure how they managed to turn 3 days in the desert to what feels like 6 episodes, but we all know the editors over at Bravo are not too bright.  Melissa is awake and complaining.  She is sick, but feeling better and ready for a drink by the pool and less therapy.

Jac is at breakfast with Chris still talking about Teresa’s comment about karma, which Chris thinks is about his son.  For the love of God.  That was not what she said and Jac is a moron.  He should know better than to think his wife understood anything correctly.  She is not a smart girl.

Time for horse therapy and the whole gang is going.  In regards to the editing, Teresa is with Jac and Chris and Joe comes to get them, telling them they are late and need to get going.  Cut to a bus and they are arriving, but everyone’s clothes are different. The editing here sucks.

Wyatt is the therapist and I start off thinking he is full of crap, but I quickly learn he is brilliant.  Melissa is not into him, Caroline is flirting with him, everyone is skeptible, Rich is offensive and Chris offers to go first. They are going to approach a horse and clean his hoof.

Rich makes fun of Wyatt who quickly puts him in hi place saying Rich makes jokes to avoid his feelings.  Nice.  Rosie is up next.  She cries and it comes out that she is uncomfortable being her.  I love this woman.  Love her. That said, her “I’m a lonely lesbian” storyline needs to be done.

Bravo needs to get Rosie off of this show and give her a show of her own. We need a dating show for Rosie.  We all want her to find love and feel worthy so help her bravo.  We would all watch her date and search for love. Rosie is a wonderful woman and we want her to b happy.

Melissa is up next and we are immediately reminded how stupid she is.  Wyatt tells her she walks like a whore on a stroll and I am loving this guy.  Melissa does not understand the exercise, or his questions.  He calls her manipulative, which makes Juicy laugh, which is awesome.

Melissa is offended by Wyatt’s take of her.  Well,  she would be uncomfortable if she understood what was going on. Melissa can’t do it and gets Joe’s help.  Joe can’t do it and gets Teresa’s help.  Teresa can’t do it.  They refuse to be vulnerable because they are busy being idiots.

Time for Kathy and Rich.  As they take their turn Juicy leaves to take a phone call and Teresa runs after him.  Considering his past phone calls while on a group vacation I would go after him too.  Turns out it is Milania and they take the call.  When your kids call you take the call.  

Rich and Kathy are silly.  Kathy implies their relationship is very troubled, Rich indicates he has no idea, and I am bored.  This couple bring nothing of interest to the show.  The phone call from Milania is more interesting that the Wakile’s.  I am going to skip over them before I fall asleep.

Wyatt is annoyed by Juicy and Teresa being on the phone, then it is Jac’s turn. She is crying for no reason. Probably because after major reconstructive surgery, she still has no neck.  She cries, Teresa hugs her, and it is a kumbaya moment.  Blah, blah, blah.  It is Juicy’s turn.

Juicy admits he is nervous about his pending legal trouble and everyone is shocked he was willing to admit it in this forum. I feel sad for this man and his family.  No matter what he did, and we know he did something, he has four young kids and a loving wife and time in prison will be sad.

Juicy goes in again and gets the job done.  I like this man.  I feel bad for him, would make out for him if he were not married, and pray for his family. Time for Albert and Caroline.  Albert cries and you see how impressive Wyatt and this type of therapy is.  I feel sad for Albert.

He appears to not have any connection to his wife, who is desperately in love with him, and it is uncomfortable to watch.  This scene would be much more powerful if he were not wearing a blk. hat, but still it is touching.  Caroline’s marriage does not look fulfilling to loving to me.  Bless her.

Everyone is talking about the horse therapy.  Kathy is making it about her being slighted by Teresa and Juicy.  Teresa did not get it, Melissa is an idiot, Jac and Chris are talking about Teresa which we al know is all Jac has to talk about, other than her child.  There is no storyline here.

Teresa and Juicy are in a hot tub and I am over their water scenes.  You can see the torment and fear on Teresa’s face, and feel the fear of Juicy.  I am buying into all of it until Teresa says Juicy does not deserve to be going through this.  If he did something wrong, then yes he does.

I hope it all works out for them and they are able to avoid jail time and be with their kids. Time for a little Navajo music and dance by the fire.  I love the Navaho guy and the entire group is bored out of their minds and wanting a drink more than the drumming of Native American drums.

Rosie says that Kathy was disrespected when she did the horse exercise. Teresa defends herself and says she is always going to take a call from her kids.  Kathy is mumbling and again, I am out.  I do not pay attention to anything this family says.  They need to be let go already. 

Rich, who has been saying Juicy needs to go to jail, now says he hopes he does not go.  Whatever.  Teresa and Jac go off to have a burning ceremony and I am drinking to make this go aster.  Teresa is wasting her time with this woman. She will hurt her in the end we all know it.

I am done and these last couple of minutes are of no interest to me.  Bravo to Teresa for trying to mend fences, but this is all a waste of time.  Next week there ill be more fighting, because of Melissa, and it will go down. Same crap, different day.  This show is no longer keeping it real.

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