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March 4, 2013

Real Housewives of Atlanta Go Hollywood

http://www.jewishjournal.com/blog/item/real_housewives_of_atlanta_go_hollywood/

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We start off with NeNe who is hosting the ladies in Los Angeles.  Gregg is excited to see the girls for a visit at their home and we learn that after LA the girls are off to Vegas for some fun.  NeNe’s impersonation of Kenya is hilarious and you just know that these bitches are going to ruin the visit.  Kenya is not talking to Phaedra or Porsha but she is not going to stress out about them because letting it go will reduce her chances of cancer.  Dear Lord she is crazy. The girls arrive and they can’t drive up to the house because their dumbass Hummer limo is too big.  Kandi complains nonstop.

Bravo is putting the bitches up in a rental and it is fabulous. I’m not sure why they didn’t go to a hotel for two days but whatever.  NeNe drives down to pick them up and they are impressed with the house and congratulate NeNe as if she had something to do with it.  Bravo thinks viewers are stupid. NeNe is a genius for not wanting them in her house.  Kenya looks around at the rental wondering why she does not live there and Porsha is in awe. Everyone is tired from the long day.  Really?  They flew from Atlanta to LA not Atlanta to Paris.  These chicks are spoiled, ridiculous, and full of crap.

The girls were supposed to be at NeNe’s for dinner at 9:00 pm and they arrive at almost midnight.  She hired a caterer and bartender but these bitches never bothered to tell her they were coming late.  Very interesting that they arrive in a Hummer limo.  Did they walk down the hill to the car? Important to note that Bravo needs to start treating the viewer with respect because we are pissed off.  Was the entire scene with NeNe having to pick them up fake?  Yes.  Did they hire a separate car to drive them down the hill? No.  This show sucks when they pull garbage like this on us.

They arrive and Nene sends them all home which is perfect. Porsha thinks NeNe sending them home is disrespectful.  Kenya insists they are there for Nene but Ms. NeNe is not having it and they leave.  It is shocking they are all kvetching about how rude Nene was.  Really? Such a pathetic bunch. NeNe is pissed, the bitches are annoyed, Gregg is gracious, and Cynthia is mortified.  Cynthia knows that they only time we care about her on this show is when she is with NeNe so she can see her money train pulling away from the station.  Kandi too tired to say sorry for being late, but requests food.

They stop for burgers on the way back to their house and in the interview section Kandi’s hairstyle changed from one sentence to the next. The editing and scripting of this show is shameful.  Night one in Los Angeles is a total bust but in Gone With The Wind fashion, tomorrow is another day.  Twirl! The next day Kenya gets up early to make breakfast for the group.  She makes a basic meal but wants to be thanked for making a breakfast fit for a Queen.  Whatever.  Porsha is assigned making coffee and bless her she just can’t do it.  She is really pretty and really, really stupid. For real.

Everyone comes down for breakfast and it is on.  Phaedra and Porsha are fake and lame with Kenya but Kenya is keeping calm because she does not want to get cancer.  Phaedra says being late is a black thing and let me just while it may be a black thing, it is also a rude thing.  Selfish bitches. Gregg and NeNe are at home and NeNe is still irritated from the night before.  Gregg talks Nene off the ledge and I love him.  I was not into him last season but bless him, he has worked hard to get her back and I am happy for them.  I hope they have a beautiful new life together.

The group is going to The Groundlings Improv Company for a class and Kenya wants it to be all about her.  She goes on and on about what a talented and accomplished actress she is while everyone rolls their eyes.  Kenya is livid that she is not getting respect from the others for her acting career. Sidebar:  I think Kenya Moore is mentally deficient.  She is really not well and while I get she needed the money, this show is doing her no favors.  We didn’t know who she was before she was on the show and now that we do, we simply don’t care.  I wonder what she thinks of herself on here.

They do an improve game and Kenya hates on everyone.  NeNe arrives late, classic.  Kandi is talking about food again, and the class ends.  The girls are off to see Nene’s workplace.  She gives them a tour of Paramount and clearly can’t drive a golf cart.  The girls look in her trailer but don’t enter. Weird. Kenya is flirting with any man who crosses her path and it would be cute and charming if she were not so crazy.  Cut to everyone dolled up and sitting down to dinner.  Porsha is not drinking and everyone asks if she is preggers. She says she is not, but trying.  Phaedra says she is trying too.

Everyone is talking about babies and Kenya is sad.  I feel bad for her.  I still think she is a lunatic, but I feel bad for her.  Kandi says Kim stole her baby name and we are transported right back to high school.  In an attempt to hurt Kenya, she brings up the workout video drama.  Such a loser. Kenya is not getting sucked in and Phaedra is idiotic, so they switch to marriage.  NeNe feels lucky to be with Gregg, Porsha is happy to bow down to her husband, and Kenya announces she broke up with Walter.  Phaedra says it is because you cannot make a whore a housewife.  Oh no she didn’t.

Yes she did!  Everyone is talking about how much they all like Walter and it hurts Kenya’s feelings.  Porsha is rubbing her friendship with Walter in Kenya’s face and Kenya has enough and walks off.  NeNe chases after her to fix it and it’s a real shame.  The gossiping at the table continues. These girls are hard on Kenya and it’s a drag.  Kenya makes us think she is crazy all by herself so they should just back off and let her embarrass herself on her own and stop trying so hard to humiliate her.  I have no respect for Phaedra.  Porsha and Cynthia are just too dumb to talk about.

Next week they will be in Vegas so that will be fun.  By fun of course I mean a train wreck.  The more the girls pick on Kenya the more I like her and think they are trash.  I really hope Nene does not come back next year so I can give up Atlanta once and for all because this city is not keeping it real.

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