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JewishJournal.com

November 13, 2012

Real Housewives of Atlanta Brings in the Crazy

http://www.jewishjournal.com/blog/item/real_housewives_of_atlanta_brings_in_the_crazy/

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Photo Courtesy of BravoTV.com

I am fascinated by the women of Atlanta.  They are not real friends, but have mastered the art of fake friendship.  They are jealous of each other, in constant competition, and unapologetic about all of it.  They are pretentious and full of crap, but in the end they are the most real of all the housewife casts.  By real of course I mean they have the potential for realness.

We start off this week with NeNe in Los Angeles for the gay pride parade. She is with her young son and it is sweet.  I am genuinely happy for her success.  She is fabulous and the main reason I watch this show.  She goes and I will bail, so I’m glad she ‘s here for another season.  It says a lot about her that she stuck with it when she could have dumped them.

NeNe shows her son the difference between a Queen’s wave and her own, which is hilarious.  NeNe tells us the gays have invented everything.  I freaking love her.  She is being shown love and it makes her cry, which is lovely.  She has arrived and achieved. Watching her have the moment is really special.  Her son is proud and the whole thing is beautiful. 

Greg arrives to share in the day and I wish them well.  I would not take him back, but good for her for trying to restore her family.  Over to Kandi, she is having lunch with Phaedra and Kenya.  Kandi looks fabulous. Phaedra is the southern belle, and Kenya is a hot mess.  She looks like a man, and is clearly in need of some serious medication.  The hard stuff.

I go back and forth on Phaedra because I think she tries too hard, but Phaedra at lunch is perfection.  Kenya is talking about the Jet event with Cynthia and it is hilarious.  She says Jet invited her, but didn’t Cynthia say she invited her?  Phaedra loves Kenya, Kandi is loves the gossip, and Kenya is digging her own grave with these ladies.

Kenya tells them she is going to get engaged and hopes to get pregnant right away.  Phaedra says she wants another baby and they can be pregnant at the same time.  I’m not sure crazy should be breeding, but I’m excited for Phaedra.  Over to Kim,  I cannot take anything she says seriously.  She is bad television and should not be here. 

Kim is vulgar and rather repulsive.  Kroy’s family must watch and pray to Jesus that their baby will be okay under the spell of this woman.  She is painful to watch.  There is nothing interesting or authentic about her.  Time for her to go away and live her life.  She has ridden the train as far as she can and her fifteen minutes is officially over.

Over in Crazytown, Kenya’s aunt comes to visit.  She tells Kenya she is worried about her boyfriend Walter, and is not sure why she has never met him after their dating for two years.  Something is not right here.  Kenya is worried her aunt will scare him away so she is not doing a introduction. The aunt calls her out and says she needs to meet him.

Kenya starts crying and says her aunt’s approval matters to her and the aunt is begging her not to cry.  Sounds like that begging happens a lot.  Kenya says she would not date someone her aunt did not approve of, then says she does not want to introduce them until they are engaged.  That makes no sense. Kenya is the best kind of crazy.  She is TV crazy!

NeNe is taking the high road with everyone, and I like it.  She goes to work out with Cynthia and Phaedra and it is funny.  Cynthia is going to throw a party for women to show love to NeNe for her success, and Kim is going to be invited.  Phaedra says she met Kenya and Cynthia tries to change her opinion.  Cynthia hates Kenya.  Great television.

It’s Kim’s birthday and I can’t take it.  She is repulsive to me.  I don’t like anything about her, except her kids and her husband.  She eats with her mouth open, talks with her mouth full, and is starting to look a lot older than her husband.  Kroy gives her a diamond bracelet, she fake cries and wipes fake tears and I am not down.  I am done with Kim.

Kenya is out to eat with Walter and he is not into her.  It is obvious, and really funny.  She is acting weird around him and it’s as if they are having a first date, not into it for two years.  Kenya tells Walter she wants a baby, and to be with him, and he starts sweating and drinking water like he might die.  She is losing her mind and I am loving it.

Kenya wants to know what his skeletons are.  He tells her he asked Kandi out and she shot him down.  Kenya starts with the crazy eyes and I am expecting her head to start spinning.  She is not well.  She is pissed off and the entire conversation is very strange.  This is what two years of dating looks like?  Walter is clearly just not that into her.

Kenya starts drinking, takes her food to go before it is even served, and excuses herself from the table.  Walter has no idea what is going on and Kenya comes back to say she needs to think.  Think about what?  He tells her she is a hard worker.  That’s romantic.  He flirts with her and she slips into yet another personality.  She’s a loon.

Kim is back and I can’t take it.  She is vulgar and I am embarrassed for her kids and Kroy’s family.  Phaedra is off to visit Kandi and is scared of her dog.  Dead dogs are cool, but living ones?  Not so much.  Phaedra is sweet, but this meeting is so fake.  The palatial house has Kandi’s crap in it and Bravo keeps showing her fake plants, which is funny.

Phaedra invites Kandi to NeNe’s party and Kandi is not sure why she was invited, but she will go.  Anything for camera time.  The party is on and there are some interesting ladies there, along with a large group of wannabes. Kenya arrives and lets us know that now she is town, she is getting invited to everything.  Really?  She is not well.

Kim arrives and after five minutes is ready to go.  Cynthia shows and I can’t get past her boob job.  They are distracting.  Kim bails before NeNe arrives and the other ladies expected as much.  NeNe arrives and runs into Kim and tells her to not go.  NeNe is lovely to Kim and tells her to stay for five minutes.  NeNe is a lady and Kim is a pig.

Kim tells Nene she will stay, then leaves anyway.  Kim is a troll. Cynthia goes on and on about NeNe and how great she is in a speech. Then Kenya takes the mic, calls Cynthia a clown, and takes NeNe off for a chat.  Cynthia sees her talking to Nene and heads over.  Kenya says to NeNe that she hopes they can be friends, and Cynthia says no.

These women are interesting.  By interesting of course I mean a blast to make fun of.  It’s like watching paint dry.  At least when Nene is on she adds some color to an otherwise grey show.  I watch because Kenya’s breakdown will be epic, but I’m skipping over all things Kim.  Atlanta is back, but I’m not sure it should be.  That is keeping it real.

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