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October 30, 2013

LeAnn Rimes, LeAnn Rimes, LeAnn Rimes

http://www.jewishjournal.com/blog/item/leann_rimes_leann_rimes_leann_rimes/

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One could write about LeAnn Rimes every single day and not run out of new things to say. She is seriously a hot mess and by hot mess of course I mean she needs to be medicated. By medicated of course I mean she should be talking medication from a physiatrist, not the medication she seems to be taking recreationally.  She truly is a simple girl.  Bless her.

LeAnn is having a bad day.  Rumors are rampant that she is getting divorced, her lawsuit against an innocent special education teacher and her daughter got thrown out of court, another blogger has called her out for being a bully, and I have decided to dress up as her for Halloween. Important to note that dressing up as LeAnn Rimes is an easy costume to pull off.

All you have to do is find out what Brandi Glanville is wearing, then wear the same thing, tweet non-stop about how happy you are, insist you are not reading any blogs written by me, then quote those blogs, find a handsome man to walk around and look repulsed by you, while you hang onto him, borrow a couple of kids, flare your nostrils, and drink.  A lot.

I received a lot of inquiries today to see if now that the lawsuit was not happening, would I continue to write about Ms. Rimes? Yes. Yes I will. I write about celebrities and pop culture, so it makes sense I would write about her. Think what you want about LeLe, she is fascinating. I don’t respect her actions, but in fairness, I also have never met her.

LeAnn goes out of her way to try to hurt me.  She has been rather unsavory and aggressive in her support of those who try to get me fired, embarrass me, and frankly put me in harm’s way.  I say things about her that while true, are not particularly kind, so I get her need to lash out.  I really do.  It is a shame that she does not seem to care about any of it.

I offered to never write about her again if she dropped the lawsuit, but she didn’t, and today it was tossed out for being stupid.  I would like to make Ms. Rimes another offer. Should Ms. Rimes like to pay for ALL of Kim and Lexi Smiley’s legal bills, I will NEVER write about her again.  Not one word.  To be clear, I mean every single bill, down to paperclips.

If she pays for all the legal bills of the remarkable Kim Smiley and her wonderful daughter Lexi, I will not write about her, will not tweet about her, will not write about her marriage, her madness, her upcoming “reality” show, or her music.  I will not write a single thing.  All she needs to do is write a check.  Is my silence worth a few thousand dollars?

If you are quiet you can actually hear heads exploding right now as LeAnn and her minions are trying to figure out ways to sue me for extortion.  They are so dumb that it is almsot cute. This is not extortion.  It is simply me saying that should Ms. Rimes opt to be kind and decent, I will provide the same in return, so try to relax people.  Seriously.

It is not rocket science, it is simply being decent.  If she does a kind thing, so will I. My job is to write about her and I will sign a legal document that her ambulance chasing shark can draw up. I won’t write another thing. Not even about how she is lying to Radar Online about asking for the case to be thrown out. All she needs to do is start keeping it real.

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