October 17, 2011 | 10:55 am

Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion Part 1 Recap

Posted by Ilana Angel

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Last night was part 1 of the NJ reunion and it was good.  It was really good, which makes me wonder why Bravo felt the need to use week 2 footage in their promos.  We were all going to watch.  Guaranteed.  But the teasers for last night, included scenes from next week, so when we didn’t see those things, it was disappointing.

We’re hooked Andy Cohen.  We are going to watch so don’t disrespect us and tease us with stuff you are not showing.  Last night was did not need to steal from next week.  The ladies looked fabulous last night and it’s a shame Jacqueline did not show.  I was cool with her not going because she needed to take care of herself.

The thing is, she was on Twitter commenting on the entire show, every second.  If she didn’t want to go to the reunion, then she should not be telling us now what she thinks.  She bailed and so she should have kept her mouth shut. She had her chance and blew it.  Next week she will be at it again and it’s super annoying.  Shut up Jac.

The show starts with Caroline and Melissa on one side, Kathy and Teresa on the other.  Poor Kathy.  She totally lost the coin flip and was forced to sit with Teresa.  Caroline starts off by explaining that Jac could not come and face Teresa, and Tree responded with “Bring it on Baby”.  The tension is palpable, and lines have been drawn in the sand.

It’s Teresa against the rest of them and it’s sad.  Here’s the thing, this show makes me a little schizophrenic.  I go back and forth between picking favorites, and I can understand both sides of the fence.  In the end they are all crazy bitches, which is what you have to be to allow your life to be documented this way.  We are watching lives crumble.

They start talking about the cookbook, and Teresa says it was all in good fun. Melissa questions why she wrote about her, and Teresa says she never mentioned Melissa by name.  Teresa is on the defensive and ready to rumble. She’s too wound up to talk calmly, and Caroline is too mad to not attack at every turn.  Kathy and Melissa are ladies.

Caroline says the book was not funny, and tells Teresa to take her picture out of it.  Melissa stands up for Caroline, Kathy sits quietly, and Teresa is on a rampage.  Caroline tells Andy the book was the last straw and there were issues with Teresa for a long time.  Two years in fact.  She says she was “trained” by Teresa to not like Melissa and Kathy.

Teresa is calling Caroline out as a liar, and the attacks begin.  Melissa is going after Teresa, and while listening to Melissa I believe her, but the comebacks from Teresa, could also be true.  The fact is we will never know who is lying.  This show is not about knowing the truth, but more about picking your favorite housewife and sticking by her.

I like them all for different reasons so it’s hard to pick a side.  I think they are all telling their truth, which is probably a lie.  Teresa is mad that Melissa and Kathy agreed to be on the show without telling her.  Really?  I’m not sure how that would be possible, but if it’s true, Teresa should be mad at Bravo for not telling her.  They are who screwed her over.

Caroline tells Tree that she “crucified” Melissa and Kathy to this country.  Is she kidding?  A little dramatic no?  The reunion is clearly a gang up on Teresa show and it’s too bad.  I feel sorry for her that she is there alone, without anyone to have her back. She is there as Danielle was her last year, alone.  Karma is a bitch and she is slapping Teresa.

They show the christening, yet again, and it’s brutal.  Watching Joe Gorga in that show is heartbreaking.  His pain is just too much and it was the moment that I fell in love with Joe.  Teresa wipes away fake tears, and Melissa is sad that this is the memory of her child’s christening.  What will it take for this family to walk away from this train wreck?

It would appear Teresa went out of her way to exclude Joe and Melissa from the show and her life.  Melissa says Teresa never invited Joe to anything, and Teresa says that if Melissa was a good wife, she would have called her, right after giving birth, and helped mend the fractured relationship.  That comment makes me think Teresa is insane.

Teresa says what she thinks we want to hear, but it translates into lies. Teresa remembers things the way she had hoped they happened, not how they actually did.  Everyone is against her, and I get it, but come on.  She showed the christening show to Gia, Caroline knows it for sure, yet Teresa denies it.  I don’t think Caroline lies, so I’m with her.

Andy shows a video about how they all butcher the English language and it’s hilarious.  Teresa thinks it’s her language, which proves that we are dealing with a crazy woman.  Bless her, she is dumb, and being attacked, and I find myself feeling bad for her, even though I know she is a liar.  Her husband has given her beautiful children and ruined her life.

It must be hard for her to see Melissa living the life she once had.  We see a video recap of Melissa and Joe and I love them.  I think they are a sweet couple and I they are fabulous.  Thanks to Jesus, they have a blessed life, and watching them has got to hurt Teresa.  I think the jealousy Teresa has for Melissa is eating her alive, and it’s very sad.

Teresa seems to be unaware of how we all see her.  She says she knows nothing about the bankruptcy, or how things are going on with the legal battles, and I don’t understand how she can be so nonchalant about something so important.  It could be that it’s just too much for her, or maybe she is just really, really, really dumb.

Sidebar:  Andy and Kathy call Tree out for her comment on her Jewish friends, and that maybe Jews don’t care about marriage unless there is money.  Oy vey!  As a Jew I was not offended by what she said.  She is a dingbat and meant no harm.  She told her daughter to marry a Jew because they make good husbands.  This was just a stupid thing.

Proving that Teresa is dumb, she did not understand that Melissa and Kathy were paying her a compliment about how she handles all the pressure of the press, and she thought they were knocking her.  I am walking away from the reunion feeling sorry for Teresa that she is so dumb and in such denial about what is happening in her life.  Poor girl.

She goes on to say that Joe Gorga got his start in business because of Juicy Joe, and Kathy started her baking because of her cookbook.  I had no idea Teresa and Joe were so generous with their gift of business success.  Dear Lord, this crazygirl is so desperate she is pulling crap out of her ass. Business advice from Tree and Juicy?  Right.

Teresa has no idea how serious her problems are and thinks her little cookbook is going to save her from continued financial ruin.  It’s annoying that Andy is not pushing her a little.  He pushed Danielle for answers, yet is leaving Teresa alone and not digging, which is odd.  His show contributed to her problems, yet he seems to not care too much.

Nobody can talk without Teresa commenting on it, and finally at minute 58 Caroline has had enough and lets loose.  She says she does not understand Teresa, or what she is saying, and she is done.  Finally.  Everyone is letting Teresa off the hook which is too bad, but maybe it will be different in part 2 because we didn’t really learn anything from part 1.

I love the housewives shows but feel that my being a fan is not being respected too much.  Twitter gave us more info that the reunion.  People thought Andy was mean to Teresa and I didn’t think he was at all.  He was gentle with her when she needed a kick in the ass.  Next week will hopefully be better and we will get some answers to our questions.

If not, we can always go to Twitter, where all the answers are given and are current, not from months ago.  I hope Jacqueline will shut up and stop with the lame tweets.  If she had something to say, she should have gone to the reunion, which should have been a 2 hour special, not over 2 weeks.  Making us wait so long is not cool, and not keeping it real.

October 11, 2011 | 9:31 pm

Dancing With The Stars – Cher is Good Luck & Chynna Can’t Hold On

Posted by Ilana Angel

I love this show. There is enough pure entertainment to keep watching, and enough to make fun of that blogging it is fun. Tom Bergeron is brilliant, and Brooke is wildly mockable.  The dancing is excellent and in a sea of favorites, it’s hard to know who will come out on top.  I’ve got my money on Ricki Lake, but I’m in it until the end and there are bound to be surprises.

Chynna Phillips:  She is a great dancer but I find her personality off putting. She is a bit boring and while I can appreciate she is dancing well, I do not feel invested in her, so I don’t care if she goes.  I’m sure she is lovely, but she’s not giving me anything care about.  Her tango tanked big time.

David Arquette:  He’s also a good dancer, but I’m pulling for him because I like him.  He is an oddball to be sure, but funny and charming also.  He did okay this week and while he has no shot in hell of winning, he is a pleasure. He seems happy and for some reason that matters to me.

Carson Kressley: He is by far my favorite contestant this season.  He is funny, fabulous, trying hard and a hot pirate.  He has the best personality, is not milking any sympathy car for votes, and is a true entertainer.  I hope he stays because his freestyle will undoubtedly be brilliant.

Nancy Grace:  Between the nipples, farting, and fumbled splits, I’m afraid it’s time for Nancy to go home.  She is more likeable on her own show than here and it’s a shame.  If she had been her fiery self she may have done well, but she is boring me to tears and needs to go.

Hope Solo:  Her size and body type leave her looking more tranny than pretty, and her facial expression while dancing has a constipated feel to it. She is a nice girl, looked just like Jessie, and is a talented dancer, but I’m over her and don’t think she’ll make it to the end.

Rob Kardashian: It was hilarious when, while wearing neon teal socks and pink shoes, he tells Cheryl he wants his jumps to look more masculine.  He’s working hard, but he is not going to win.  I like him, and didn’t when the show started so that’s something. He’s not making it to the finals.

Ricki Lake:  Love her.  Loved the dance, loved the dress, loved the music, loved it all.  Her talk about wanting to quit was lame, did not make me laugh or feel compassion.  Such a shame she went there.  Either way, she wins the night, and will win the trophy in the end.  Go Ricki!

Chaz Bono:  I love him.  He was really good this week, which is lucky for him because he tanked last week and managed to not get cut because we love him.  I cry when I see him dance because he represents so many people who have no voice, and no power.  I think he is a hero.

JR Martinez: There is nothing not to love about this guy.  He is a great dancer, and a great man.  He did a good job and he will be in the finals for sure.  He is an entertainer and just a great guy.  This show will hopefully catapult him from the soaps to the big time.

In the end it is Chynna that is going home.  She didn’t make us love her so it makes sense that America was not into it and sent her on her way.  Dancing is important to be sure, but if we are going to be honest, this is just as much of a popularity contest so it’s anyone’s game.

I want Carson, Chaz, Ricki and JR to be the final four.  The popular kids against the underdogs, which is always a good battle.  Cher is a good luck charm and Carson is magic.  The thought of homophobes losing their minds is fabulous.  Buckle up America, we are keeping it real.

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October 11, 2011 | 4:42 pm

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills – Oy Vey!

Posted by Ilana Angel

I am watching this show, but finding it difficult to write about it.  This is a messed up group of women.  Of all the ladies, in all the cities, this group is the meanest.  They are unkind to each other, back stab, talk trash, and are all around unappealing.  I cannot bear to recap this entire episode but here are some things worth mentioning.

1) Lisa is funny and seems lovely, but her shutting up Ken when he wanted to make a speech about his daughter getting engaged was gross.  She is rude and I find myself not digging her that much.

2) Dana is a dingbat.  She seems like a fun friend, but totally flakey and ditzy.  Her “going all out” party was pathetic, and her name and money dropping is classless.  She needs lessons from the Countess.

3) Kyle is under the false impression that she is entertaining.  She is a mean girl and appears to be incapable of basic social manners.  She is desperate to be the popular sister in a group of D List sisters.

4) Adrienne is rude to her husband and with two young children, it is amazing that she is leaving them a legacy of her chopping of their dad’s balls each week.  She has gone from cute to gross in one season.

5) Brandi is a hoot. She is uncensored, sarcastic, and quite funny.  Of all the ladies she is the one I would like to have a drink with. The ladies are ripping her apart and it’s too bad because she is harmless and could have used some support.

6) Kim is under the influence of narcotics.  There is no way in hell this woman is not using drugs, and that Bravo has not stepped in to help her is shameful.  Her pain is palpable and she is going to hurt herself. Not even her fame whore sister is stepping in.

7) Camille is entertaining and I love her.  Maybe it’s her young Greek lover, but she is much more likable this year.  I’m glad she came back to show us who she is because who she was last season, was not so great. She is thriving in the land of the cougar.

8) Taylor should not be on television.  I don’t get her, or why she is still on this show. She is not well physically or emotionally, and that she keeps filming, knowing the father of her child has died, is gross. Especially since his blood is still on her hands.

Lisa is a snob, Dana is a fame whore, Kyle is a mean girl, Adrienne is a bitch, Brandi is a hoot, Kim is a drunk, and Camille has become the fun one.  This show is lame, and something else bad is going to happen.  It’s just a matter of time.  In fact, it could be next week.  I have a fantasy that Brandi knocks out Kim’s teeth, and then sleeps with Kyle’s husband to celebrate.

I’m just kidding of course.  That might happen in real life, but not in the fake fest of scripted, unscripted television.  Unless they are going to start showing these shows closer to the time they are filmed, we will all loose interest because Twitter wars are more fun than watching things that are months old.  Time to catch up Bravo, and start keeping it real.

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October 11, 2011 | 9:22 am

Real Housewives of New Jersey: Finale is Slow but Reunion Will Explode

Posted by Ilana Angel

No big bombshells on the final hour with the girls from New Jersey. With all the trash talk going on with twitter, I figured it would be mellow in anticipation of the reunion next week.  The housewife formula is working less and less, yet new women are lining up to be a part of a show that has a 50/50 chance of breaking up your marriage or showing your financial ruin to the world.  I don’t get it, but I’m watching, so God Bless them all.

We start off with Teresa and Melissa prepping for a family portrait with all the kids.  Tensions are high as everyone gets ready, but they are all hopeful it can be done.  Over at Jacqueline’s, Jaime, brother of Chris, is invited over to talk to Ashley.  He’s fun so I’m not sure if it’s an introduction to his being a part of next season, or just someone to fill time in a slow moving finale.  In his talking to Ashley, we discover that she has gotten tattoos.

Sidebar:  Ashley has officially changed her name to Ashlee.  Totally lame. She has a “swallow” on her forearm, which is hideous.  It’s not dainty and pretty, but rather sailor-ish and not cute.  She also has a feather on her foot, with a bird for each of her brothers.  When you show your tattoo to someone and start with “it’s supposed to be”, then chances are the tattoo sucks.  It’s ugly and looks like an inkblot on her foot that needs washing.

Ashley is explaining that she is going to move to LA and get a job.  Jaime is asking her how the move will work and she starts crying and walks out.  This kid is a mess and having met her, she is also really sweet, but the pressure of the world watching is killing this kid.  Jacqueline is harsh with her, and Chris is way too lenient.  This kid is a screw up and a lot of the blame falls to Jac and Chris who are divided and messing her up.  It’s boring.

Over with Caroline, she is on the radio show and while I like her a lot, I don’t really get it.  How is she qualified to give advice to people and why would anyone care?  She is telling the mother of a disabled child how to motivate her kid and I think it’s weird.  Christopher and Lauren stop by to surprise her.  By surprise of course I mean get some airtime.  Give the Manzo’s their own show and get these kids off of the housewives already.

Kathy is getting her daughter Victoria ready for prom and I freaking love her.  Kathy and her family are fabulous.  I love how she loves her kids, and I think she and Rich have done a great job raising them.  I hope the show does not ruin their lives.  Rich is talking to Victoria’s date Paulie and it’s hilarious.  He is making the poor kid nervous and it’s entertaining. This is a very sweet couple and has been a touch of sunshine in a gloomy season.

It’s picture day and Teresa makes me sad.  She is painfully aware of the cameras.  It’s a shame really. Joe and Melissa arrive and let me just say that I LOVE Melissa and Joe Gorga.  Joe is a doll and I want good things for him.  Listening to him talk about his dad is brutal.  The troubles in this family are crushing and one can’t help but point a finger at Juicy.  We don’t know what happened to get them to this point, but blaming Juicy seems okay.

Teresa and Melissa are getting the baby ready and Teresa is sucking up, which is lame, and poor Melissa is trying to believe but she is guarded and it’s hard.  Teresa does everything for the camera and it’s stupid.  The baby wants to be with Melissa not her mom, and it’s sweet but sad.  We are watching the crumbling of a family, which is uncomfortable but fascinating. The pictures are taken and look truly fabulous.  It’s a nice memory for them.

Kathy taking pictures with Victoria made me cry, and Richie telling Kathy she did a good job raising their kids, made me cry too.  I love how Kathy talks about her kids and when she said she would celebrate opening a can of tuna, if it meant being with the kids, I cried.  Again.  Kathy is a good egg and I love her.  Let’s hope that next season we get some more Kathy and some Rosie too.  Rosie should, be the new non-housewife, housewife.

At minute 42 we finally get to the cookbook.  Teresa has decided to trash all the other housewives in her book, then backtracks and says it was a joke. Right.  I feel bad for Teresa that she is married to a drunk ape, but instead of taking the high road and enjoying her success, she is crawling through the gutter.  She slams Caroline’s cooking and heritage, then slams Kathy, without naming any names, and does not acknowledge her in any way.

She also says that Melissa copies everything she does.  She keeps pushing Melissa up against a wall and it’s not fair.  She tells the camera that the book is a huge success, then 2 seconds later she talks to her publicist and asks why it’s not doing well.  The truth is the book tanked and Teresa is falling from grace very quickly.  I’m guessing the reunion will finally seal her fate and we’ll be done with her.  Hopefully so will Bravo.

Jacqueline goes to Teresa and she is putting make-up on and whining about her life and claims that her bad complexion is because of Ashley.  It’s sad to see her give up on her kid.  I get it’s hard, but she is unwilling to take any responsibility for her role in Ashley’s life.  Ashley is a lost kid well on her way to screwing up her life, and Jac is responsible for part of it.  ‘When Ashley watches and hears her mom talking about her, it must really hurt.

Cookbook-Gate begins and everyone is talking about Teresa’s book and how she bashes everyone in it.  All the ladies are pissed off, but Teresa is insisting that it was a joke and all in good fun.  Sidebar:  Teresa’s hairline starts in the middle of her forehead, which I find very distracting. Very distracting.  The season ends with Teresa defending her book, and everyone else talking about how she crossed the line and is not funny.

The only part of this episode that was interesting was Kathy and Richie with Victoria for her prom.  Everything else was simply a teaser for next week’s reunion, which will be killer!  The teasers look like we will get some clarity on all the tweets that have been sent back and forth lately.  These women are falling apart and it’s sad.  I mean it’s sad if it’s real, but it’s not it is scripted reality televisions and they knew what they were getting into.

Teresa tweeted that her Lucille Ball quote was from two years ago, and they put it in now.  It’s all a bunch of crap, but I love it.  On What Happens Live with Andy, Melissa and Joe Gorga were guests and I seriously like them.  I think they are entertaining and fun.  Whether on the show, or live with Andy, they are good television and when RHONJ is cancelled, and it will be eventually, they should get their own show.  Kathy can be on it too.

The reunion looks like it will be fabulous, it’s just a shame that Jacqueline did not go.  Maybe she will turn up part way?  It seems to me there must be some kind of contractual obligation for her to go, and if she was willing to do a reunion with Danielle, then certainly sitting with Teresa wouldn‘t be any harder.  I’m guessing she turns up, people cry, punches are thrown, Jesus is thanked, and Andy struggles to have control and keep it real.

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October 5, 2011 | 11:49 pm

Bethenny Frankel: Drowning in Lies While “Lost” at Sea

Posted by Ilana Angel

I used to think Bethenny Frankel was funny.  She was obnoxious and over the top, but had enough truly funny moments on the first season of the Real Housewives of New York that I was able to overlook the annoying parts of her.  Over the past three years however, I have lost respect for her.

Lost respect may not be the right term, as I never really had any respect for her.  Even though I did not like her, I could applaud her success, as it was impressive.  Well it was impressive, until we learned more about her and discovered nothing Bethenny says comes from a place of truth.

I have written about her a lot.  It annoys me that so many young women idolize her, and buy her crap products. She is not a role model. She is a child of wealth and privilege, who has a crazy sense of entitlement, no respect for the legacy of her father, and a pathological need to lie and be famous.

Last week when Bethenny told her story of being “lost at sea”, I knew it was a joke.  The story made no sense.  Without any deep research, I have discovered her claims were more far-fetched than I could have imagined. With a little reading, and one phone call, I managed to unravel her story.

Tim Russell, the man who was called out to Bethenny’s boat, called me and we talked about it.  He read a blog I wrote about Bethenny’s story and he got in touch to help set the record straight.  We spoke yesterday and he was forthcoming, honest and had no agenda, other than to tell the truth.

Mr. Russell has worked on the water for 40 years.  He possesses an easy and open personality, and an awesome accent.  His wife is a schoolteacher, and they are real people who work hard to make a living. They are authentic and I feel bad for him that he is caught up in this mess.

It’s fascinating that all of her claims are easily disputed because it’s all public record.  That there is not a massive outcry from her fans demanding to know why she has likely misled them is interesting.  Stop drinking the Kool-Aid!  It is laced with Sodium Benzoate.

Bethenny claims they were lost at sea with no GPS, but when the therapist called Tim to help, he told them his exact coordinates, which he read off of the GPS system.  They did call the Coast Guard, and the USCG suggested he call a tow company because there was no danger.

The Coast Guard confirmed the GPS was working and the boat was not in distress, so they suggested they call a tow company as there was no need for them to assist.  It was Bethenny’s therapist who called Mr. Russell, not the USCG.  It was 5:00 am when he got the call.

Mr. Russell explained that his rate was $250 an hour, which is his standard, offseason, nighttime rate and since it was still dark, the nighttime rate applied.  When he realized the boat was fine, he explained they did not need him and could come in on their own as the boat was fully functioning.

The therapist insisted they needed help, and said they would pay him what he wanted.  Mr. Russell thought it was bizarre, and did not know what was going on, but did not want to ignore the call incase there was an issue so he went out to get them.  His wife went along and they headed out.

When Tim got there, he saw that the boat was fine.  There were 9 people on the boat.  Bethenny, Jason, the therapist, and a Bravo film crew of 6.  They did not need a tow as the boat was fine.  They simply followed Tim and his wife back to the shore with no towing and a functioning GPS.

There was no reason for help to be called.  The Coast Guard did not assist, as there was nothing for them to do.  Tim went out because he respects the water, and was unsure of the problem.  Bethenny wasted everyone’s time, mocked the USCG, and belittled Tim Russell.

Bethenny came back to shore in the same boat she went out on.  The only way they could have gotten lost would have been captain error, but the therapist has been sailing for 30 years and can not only use the GPS, but can read charts, so there is no way they were lost.  If it it was all not faked, it was something short of “reality.”

Bethenny claims says she was out in sea for 21 hours, but does not mention it’s because they sat around for hours killing time, to help their story.  Bethenny says Jason was going to cook, but they only brought beans.  Bethenny has dug a hole she will never get out of.

Everything is documented, including the Coast Guard telling them to call a tow company.  In fact, Tim was not even the first company called.  Another boat refused to go get them, as there was no emergency. Tim went because he is a decent guy and wanted to make sure everyone was okay.

Tim was annoyed they wasted his time, and when they got back to shore, he saw it was a joke.  Bethenny got out of the boat and kissed the dock, but only after the crew got out of the boat to get the shot.  It was faked for her reality show.  None of it was real and everyone was fine.

Bethenny put this man’s safety, and professional reputation on the line.  When they started filming, Tim did not know what was going on.  The therapist told him Bethenny was a television star and just sold her company for $120 million dollars.  He was annoyed Tim did not know.

When I asked Tim about the tip stories in the press, he let me know he was not a waitress and did not work for tips.  He never received a tip, neither did the boat owner.  Bethenny told Ellen she tipped him $2800 dollars.  Not true.  Furthermore, Tim never went to the press to complain.

When talking to a reporter, he was trying to make the point that Bethenny was not honest.  He said if someone truly thought they could die, and were a millionaire, wouldn’t they say thank you, or publically acknowledge who saved her?  Wouldn’t she give a tip?

He felt it was all for show when she went on Ellen and started to talk about him. She made it look like he complained about a tip, when really she put him and his livelihood in jeopardy by using him for her fake reality.  He was kind, but made to look like a putz.

I asked Tim if he had heard Bethenny said she would sleep with him as a tip.  He let me know he would rather be shipwrecked.  This is a hardworking man who has made his living on the ocean for 40 years.  His father and grandfather were both maritime men.

In my opinion, Bethenny has a tenuous relationship to the truth.  She has made claims about her childhood, her parents, her career, her love life, her marriage, and her little boat trip.  She has built a house of half-truths and it’s all going to come crashing down.  It’s a shame she has to hurt innocent people like Tim along the way.

Tim Russell is a sweet man and I liked him.  He and his wife are good people and I hope the cloud Bethenny has placed over them passes quickly.  In the end he will have the last laugh because her story will be held up to scrutiny, he’ll have a good story, and Bethenny will lose in the end.

To be clear, Tim is not some some poor sap who got screwed over by the Bethenny machine.  He’s just a guy, who did his job, and never gave it a second thought.  When she went to the press and distorted the facts of what happened, he wanted to set the record straight. 

Having spoken to him, this is my two cents on the story, and he may not like my perspective either.  In the end he was there and I have told him if he wants to write the story in his own words, I will post it.  The bottom line is that no matter who tells the story, Bethenny’s version is dubious.

Bethenny has built an empire on hyperbole.  The truth is fragile, and when you don’t attend to it, it shatters. It’s just a matter of time, and while we wait to see what happens, I will continue to call her out, pass on the Kool-Aid, and give a voice to those who are keeping it real.

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October 5, 2011 | 12:21 am

Dancing With The Stars - UPDATED

Posted by Ilana Angel

Last night I went to the taping of Dancing With the Stars.  The new set is beautiful and I must say that the crew there is lovely.  From the pages to the camera guys, they are all very sweet and greet you with smiles.  I think television tapings are a lot of waiting and not much fun, but this show is an exception.  Being at a live taping of DWTS is really fabulous.

The dancing in person is phenomenal and if you ever have an opportunity to go, I would highly recommend it.  Last night was really great, and while I would love if Kristin Cavalarri were the one going home, I fear it might be Chaz Bono.  If it were a popularity contest he’d make the cut, but if you factor in the dancing, it might be his time, which is too bad.

I had killer VIP seats thanks to a delicious and an incredibly talented friend. I went with my son’s good friend Emily, who is a fan of the show, a lover of all things Kardashian, and super fun.  We sat behind the Kardashian clan and that was interesting.  By interesting of course I mean I have to talk about them for a minute.  By them, I mean Kim. 

Kim Kardashian is beyond beautiful.  It’s insane how spectacular looking this girl is.  She is very, very little.  Her waste was so tiny I took a double take.  That said, as pretty as she is, her mother is more beautiful.  I was blown away by how really stunning Kris is.  Granted these ladies wear an insane amount of make up, but you cannot deny how gorgeous they are.

My pal Emily loves Kim and wanted nothing more than a picture with her. She went to Kim before the taping started and told her she loved her and could she take a picture after the show as it was about to start.  Kim was very sweet and told her thank you and of course they could take a picture.  I was impressed with how gracious Kim was.  It didn’t last long.

After the show Emily went up to her to take a picture and Kim blew her off. No picture, no acknowledgement of her saying they could take a picture, just a blow off.  It was a drag because Emily is 15, and truly a fan.  It is because of young girls like her that Kim is famous, and she could not be bothered to take a pic?  She’s just a stuck up porn star.  Lame.

Enough with the talentless, let’s go on to the dancing!  Rob Karsashian was first and he was really good.  He’s a sweet boy, which was surprising because I always thought he was kind of a schmuck.  I liked him in person and while I don’t get why he’s famous, he did a great job and deserves to make it through to next week.  Sidebar:  he has a fabulous ass!

Chynna Phillips:  She was good, and her legs go on for days, but I don’t get her and am not at all invested in her.  She is boring and a little add to me, but pretty and working hard.  I don’t care if she stays or goes.  Chaz Bono was up next and let me just say that I love him.  He is adorable in person and even though he struggled last night, I hope he stays.

I spoke with his fiancé Jennifer and she was lovely.  I get they are controversial, and some people don’t get it, but this is a really great man and his being on this show is brave beyond measure.  If people could see him as simply a human being, without trying to define him, it would be a better world.  I used all my votes last night on Chaz.

Kristin Cavallari was next and seriously, I have nothing to say about her. Well, except for the fact that her voice is annoying, she is not a star, and when her dance was done and she and Mark were talking Tom, she had her hand on Mark’s bum and was rubbing it.  While it might never happen, I hope she is the one sent home tonight.

I LOVE Carson Kressley.  Seriously.  Love him.  He did a brilliant job last night and was the most audience friendly.  He waved to everyone, talked to the audience, and was simply divine.  He danced beautifully and is the most fun to watch.  I want him to stay until the very end and I think he has a shot at it.  He is my favorite cast member.

JR Martinez is a remarkable human being.  His dance was great on television, and beyond fantastic in person.  I fell in love with him last night, and there was not a dry eye in the studio when he danced.  He got a heartfelt standing ovation and it was magic.  He is a hero and will be in the finals because that is where he deserves to be.

Nancy Grace was next and I was surprised by how little she is.  She is short and tiny, and a powerhouse.  I love her and she was lovely last night.  She’s such a bulldog on her show, that it’s nice to see her vulnerable and charming. She will not make it much longer, but good for her.  She is doing a good job and her partner is adorable.

Ricki Lake is my pick to win.  I love this girl and she is a great dancer.  She looked beautiful last night and did a wonderful job.  She waved to everyone, talked to people, was charming and warm and a real person.  She is super cute, and not too far away from her first perfect score of 30.  I think she is going to take the mirror ball in the end.

Hope Solo has an insane body.  There does not appear to be a single ounce of fat on it.  She is solid and ripped, and while very pretty, not that feminine. She’s not going anywhere anytime soon, but she will not make it to the finals in my opinion.  Abby Wambach was there cheering her on, and meeting her was a thrill.  I would have dug watching Abby dance more.

David Arquette was last up and he was very sweet.  He is super skinny and extremely handsome in person.  His daughter was adorable and when I told her that her dad did a great job, she said thank you and it was darling. What they didn’t show was that when he was done dancing, he went over to kiss and hug his little girl.

Then he put out a hand to Courtney, she took it and then he turned to leave, then tuned back around, and they hugged, which made the audience erupt in applause and huge “awwww”.  It was very sweet and you got the sense people were pulling for him and while he may not get the mirrored ball, maybe he will get her back.

I think Chaz will be the one going home tonight which is a shame.  I love this show and cannot write about it without pointing out that I do not get the appeal of broke Burke, and that Tom Bergeron is the perfect host.  It is only when Tom wins an Emmy as the host, over Jeff Probst, will I truly believe that reality television has a shot at keeping it real.

UPDATE:  Kristin was voted off!  Freaking awesome.  I wanted her to go but truly thought she’d last another week.  She may have been a good dancer, but she has no personality and that matters on a show like this.  She is not even a celebrity.  I could not be happier that it was her and so happy that Chaz and Carson are safe.  Good job America!

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October 4, 2011 | 2:13 pm

Dancing With the Stars from the Good Seats

Posted by Ilana Angel

Last night I went to the live taping of Dancing With the Stars.  The new set is beautiful and I must say that the crew there is lovely.  From the pages to the camera guys, they are all very sweet and greet you with smiles.  I think television tapings are a lot of waiting and not much fun, but this show is an exception.  Being at a live taping of DWTS is really fabulous.

The dancing in person is phenomenal and if you ever have an opportunity to go, I would highly recommend it.  Last night was really great, and while I would love if Kristin Cavalarri were the one going home, I fear it might be Chaz Bono.  If it were a popularity contest he’d make the cut, but if you factor in the dancing, it might be his time, which is too bad.

I had killer VIP seats thanks to a delicious and an incredibly talented friend. I went with my son’s good friend Emily, who is a fan of the show, a lover of all things Kardashian, and super fun.  We sat behind the Kardashian clan and that was interesting.  By interesting of course I mean I have to talk about them for a minute.  By them, I mean Kim. 

Kim Kardashian is beyond beautiful.  It’s insane how spectacular looking this girl is.  She is very, very little.  Her waste was so tiny I took a double take.  That said, as pretty as she is, her mother is more beautiful.  I was blown away by how really stunning Kris is.  Granted these ladies wear an insane amount of make up, but you cannot deny how gorgeous they are.

My pal Emily loves Kim and wanted nothing more than a picture with her. She went to Kim before the taping started and told her she loved her and could she take a picture after the show as it was about to start.  Kim was very sweet and told her thank you and of course they could take a picture.  I was impressed with how gracious Kim was.  It didn’t last long.

After the show Emily went up to her to take a picture and Kim blew her off. No picture, no acknowledgement of her saying they could take a picture, just a blow off.  It was a drag because Emily is 15, and truly a fan.  It is because of young girls like her that Kim is famous, and she could not be bothered to take a pic?  She’s just a stuck up porn star.  Lame.

Enough with the talentless, let’s go on to the dancing!  Rob Karsashian was first and he was really good.  He’s a sweet boy, which was surprising because I always thought he was kind of a schmuck.  I liked him in person and while I don’t get why he’s famous, he did a great job and deserves to make it through to next week.  Sidebar:  he has a fabulous ass!

Chynna Phillips:  She was good, and her legs go on for days, but I don’t get her and am not at all invested in her.  She is boring and a little add to me, but pretty and working hard.  I don’t care if she stays or goes.  Chaz Bono was up next and let me just say that I love him.  He is adorable in person and even though he struggled last night, I hope he stays.

I spoke with his fiancé Jennifer and she was lovely.  I get they are controversial, and some people don’t get it, but this is a really great man and his being on this show is brave beyond measure.  If people could see him as simply a human being, without trying to define him, it would be a better world.  I used all my votes last night on Chaz.

Kristin Cavallari was next and seriously, I have nothing to say about her. Well, except for the fact that her voice is annoying, she is not a star, and when her dance was done and she and Mark were talking Tom, she had her hand on Mark’s bum and was rubbing it.  While it will never happen, I hope she is the one sent home tonight.

I LOVE Carson Kressley.  Seriously.  Love him.  He did a brilliant job last night and was the most audience friendly.  He waved to everyone, talked to the audience, and was simply divine.  He danced beautifully and is the most fun to watch.  I want him to stay until the very end and I think he has a shot at it.  He is my favorite cast member.

JR Martinez is a remarkable human being.  His dance was great on television, and beyond fantastic in person.  I fell in love with him last night, and there was not a dry eye in the studio when he danced.  He got a heartfelt standing ovation and it was magic.  He is a hero and will be in the finals because that is where he deserves to be.

Nancy Grace was next and I was surprised by how little she is.  She is short and tiny, and a powerhouse.  I love her and she was lovely last night.  She’s such a bulldog on her show, that it’s nice to see her vulnerable and charming. She will not make it much longer, but good for her.  She is doing a good job and her partner is adorable.

Ricki Lake is my pick to win.  I love this girl and she is a great dancer.  She looked beautiful last night and did a wonderful job.  She waved to everyone, talked to people, was charming and warm and a real person.  She is super cute, and not too far away from her first perfect score of 30.  I think she is going to take the mirror ball in the end.

Hope Solo has an insane body.  There does not appear to be a single ounce of fat on it.  She is solid and ripped, and while very pretty, not that feminine. She’s not going anywhere anytime soon, but she will not make it to the finals in my opinion.  Abby Wambach was there cheering her on, and meeting her was a thrill.  I would have dug watching Abby dance more.

David Arquette was last up and he was very sweet.  He is super skinny and extremely handsome in person.  His daughter was adorable and when I told her that her dad did a great job, she said thank you and it was darling. What they didn’t show was that when he was done dancing, he went over to kiss and hug his little girl.

Then he put out a hand to Courtney, she took it and then he turned to leave, then tuned back around, and they hugged, which made the audience erupt in applause and huge “awwww”.  It was very sweet and you got the sense people were pulling for him and while he may not get the mirrored ball, maybe he will get her back.

I think Chaz will be the one going home tonight which is a shame.  I love this show and cannot write about it without pointing out that I do not get the appeal of broke Burke, and that Tom Bergeron is the perfect host.  It is only when Tom wins an Emmy as the host, over Jeff Probst, will I truly believe that reality television has a shot at keeping it real.

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October 4, 2011 | 2:44 am

Why The Real Housewives of New Jersey are Lame & Meeting Ashlee Holmes

Posted by Ilana Angel

I watched Sunday night’s episode of RHONJ and it was interesting I guess, but what was more entertaining was the war on Twitter that the ladies of New Jersey decided to have.  It’s weird to watch a show from months ago, when we already know how everything is turning out.

The women of NJ are Twitter savvy and they go there often, so we can see in real time what is happening, which makes the episodes lame. To watch their fake vacation is simply stupid, when at the same time we are reading that Jacqueline and Teresa are no longer friends.

I also think it’s disrespectful to the fans for Caroline to go on Watch What Happens Live, and when asked how things are going, answer that we have to wait until season four.  Is she high?  We don’t need to wait for anything, we just need to read Twitter.  She is ridiculous.

Real Housewives fans are not just a bunch of crazy women sitting with their cats. I’m sure there are a lot of those, but many of us are educated and interesting women, who somehow got addicted, and are simply unable to turn away. Bravo should not disrespect us.

They need to ban the ladies from Twitter as part of the contract, or not show us storylines from months again.  It’s eventually going to get old and we’ll bail.  Jacqueline has been taking to Twitter a lot lately.  Teresa has pushed Jac to the limit, and she is done.

Word on Bravo Street is that Jac has quit the show and is focusing on her husband and children, without all the drama that being a part of the show provides.  I guess we’ll find out how that all works out when we watch season four, a couple of years from now.

Speaking of Jacqueline and her children, I met her daughter Ashlee today. I went to a taping of Dancing With The Stars and she was there with Lizzy Grubman.  I must tell you that Lizzy is shocking looking.  She simply does not look well, and does not seem to care.

She looks like someone who is the focus of an Intervention episode on A&E, not a fancy shmancy publicist.  She looks like she needs to eat a sandwich and get herself into rehab before her teeth fall out.  That said, she did not speak so I do not know if she had teeth.

Ashley was very sweet.  To start with, I was surprised by how tiny she is. She is very, very thin with a super cute body.  She was wearing very tight jeans and killer shoes that were insanely high.  I’m not sure how anyone could walk in them, but she did, and quite well.

Her hair was thrown up in a loose bun and she has new bangs.  I saw her and walked over to say hello.  She was very shy and sweet.  I asked her how she was doing, and she told me she was fine.  She seemed sincerely touched I asked her and I had to fight the urge to hug her.

She is a very pretty and young girl, but her face was puffy, and looked like she had work done.  She’s a child and I cannot imagine that she did, but there was something off about her facial features and it was odd. I’m not sure what it was, but it made me a little sad.

I welcomed her to LA, we chatted for a quick minute, and I thought she was lovely. She seems lost, and perhaps seeking direction. We see a distorted view of her life on TV, so who knows what’s really going on, but turning to Lizzy as a mother figure, it’s not going to be good.

Ashley seems like a nice girl, and in person was much different from who she is on RHONJ.  In the end we must all come to terms with the fact that unscripted TV does not exist and we see what people want us to see. I hope Ashley is able to get herself together, and keep it real.

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