May 1, 2012 | 10:04 pm
Posted by Ilana Angel
Bethenny Ever After continues to be a massive crock-pot of crap. It is slow moving, repetitive, predictable, and painful to watch. There are things that just don’t match up, which makes sense since this is a show about Bethenny and none of her stories add up. She has been lying about her life for so long that she cannot help herself and needs to lie here too. I watch this show with fascination and while I don’t blog about it on a regular basis, I have made myself a real margarita and have decided to jump back in this week.
We start the show with Bethenny, her castrated husband, and her paid friends still in Mexico. It is unbelievable to me that Jason agrees to be on this show. He went from being a delicious man I thought was fabulous, to a week man I have no respect for. The relationship between Jason and Bethenny is odd. There is no chemistry, no passion, no love, and apparently not even any like. Since Bethenny loves therapy so much, they are going to music therapy, which is a pathetic way to fill an hour of television.
The music therapy is beyond stupid. Bethenny is crude and inappropriate, Jason looks at her with a puzzled look that could be translated to either “What the hell am I doing here?” or, “Sitting is much more comfortable with no balls.” It is 10 minutes of useless television that is not entertaining on any level. The fact that the commercial breaks are almost five minutes long are a clear indication that they are scraping the editing room floor to pull together any semblance of a show. This truly is a bunch of crap.
They go to a church, make lame jokes, and RaRa starts to cry. She misses her family, blah, blah, blah. Bethenny tries to make us think she is the supportive and caring friend, but it’s stupid. Then Jason walks off to give them a moment together, and Bethenny uses the time with RaRa to ask her if she will be Bryn’s mom should her and Jason die. Is she freaking kidding me? She is asking a woman to raise her child and does not think that Jason should be part of that special moment? Bethenny is a raging bitch.
Julie is the Godmother, but she is not asked. Jason has two loving and caring parents, but they are not asked. Instead, this young woman, who they have known for a year, is going to raise their child should they die? It’s strange and wrong. There clearly has been a falling out of some kind with Bethenny and Julie and I’d love to know what it is. Here’s an idea: Bethenny is a selfish cow who took advantage of Julie and treated her like crap for so long that Julie bailed and now Bethenny is punishing her. I got it!
They go to a cooking class and Bethenny, the chef, is overwhelmed. Really? I’m skipping over this part. Cut to Jason and Bethenny having drinks with the paid friends, and Jason tells Bethenny, in front of everyone, that they have a problem with the apartment. Bethenny reacts by calling him an f’ing liar in front of everyone. What is this man thinking? Bethenny is revolting, Jason is pathetic, these young girls working for her are sad, and this show is embarrassing. I am happily watching though because my drink is perfect.
Since they have so much luck on boats, and Jason gets sea sick, they decide to take a boat ride. Maggie the newest and youngest paid friend has a small breakdown and bails on the boat ride. Julie tells Jason she is tired and could not take the job anymore. Not buying it. Bethenny let her down and that is why she is bailing. If they think we are going to believe that she is leaving because she is tired then they are insane. One cannot watch this show and not wonder about the mental wellness of Andy Cohen, because he has lost his mind.
Jason and Bethenny are having dinner alone and the fighting starts almost immediately. It’s boring and I can’t take it. They cannot stand to be together so why are they? She cares more about her business than her husband, and he is more of a sperm donor than a husband, so it’s just a mess. This is not good television. Bethenny is self-destructing and while I thought it would be fun to watch, in the end, not so much. It’s exhausting, and as a viewer I feel manipulated and disrespected. Shame on me for watching.
Bethenny is fake crying which is hilarious. She sniffs, has no tears, and wants us to think she is sad? Okay. He blames her, she blames him, and it’s a vicious cycle. She is complaining about how poor she was which is ridiculous. Jason storms off, then returns. By returns of course I mean it was edited to look like he came back, but I think he simply bailed. This show is out of control and while I like to think I’m done, I will be back next week because I am the only one who is willing to discuss Bethenny and keep it real.
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