July 1, 2012 | 11:20 pm
Posted by Ilana Angel
The episode this week is proof that Bravo is now struggling to put a show together in New Jersey. It was boring, dragged out, full of inconsistencies, and dripping with fakeness. It’s hard to care enough to watch for an hour and near impossible to blog about. You have to wonder why we still bother watching, and exactly how stupid does Bravo think we all are?
None of the chicks like each other, the meetings are forced, there is no love, no respect, and no entertainment with these people. It’s interesting to watch only because it is a train wreck, but this week there was no wreckage. All we got was scripted garbage, a fake reality doctor, and clear proof that they need to recast this show or we are all going to be out.
We start this slow and painful hour of television at Teresa’s house watching Juicy stucco the house with the girls helping. This family is funny and I think they could carry their own sow. I love the kids, think Juicy is best when he stays home and does not interact with too many outsiders, and think Teresa puttering around the house is oddly entertaining.
Teresa is talking to Juicy about Jac again and it’s odd. She tells the camera Jac confided in her about a bankruptcy, yet she is telling the camera. It makes no difference that we know, she is breaking a confidence and Teresa needs to be careful because people are looking for reasons to hate her and she can’t be giving them any ammunition. Keep quiet Tre.
Rosie comes over to talk to Tre about her bashing Kathy. It’s sweet, but really? Does Rosie need to fight Kathy’s battles? Rosie seems like a wonderful person, and they are making her look silly with the interfering and the gay storyline. Rosie is fabulous because she is fabulous and being gay has nothing to do with it. It’s not cute what they are doing.
Teresa spends the majority of the show defending herself and it is boring. I am a fan of Teresa, think she is good television, and I have been on her side, but she needs to be careful what she says to the camera one-on-one. She is saying things tonight that don’t sit well with me and while I think she is on the defensive, she could cross over to bitch real fast.
The Gorga’s are with Kathy and Rich, gossiping about Teresa again, and it’s weird. It would appear Teresa is all they ever talk about. Important to note however that this scene is the only one in which Melissa appears this week and that is a good thing. Melissa is sucking the joy out of this show so limiting her participation is good. More Joe and less Mel is good.
Rich is telling the camera some crap about Teresa and seriously, I am over him. Why is he even talking to the camera? He is not a housewife. Gorga is talking about his being an angel from God and we are reminded that while Melissa is bad for this show, Joe is fabulous. Rosie joins in and the gossiping about Teresa starts up again. It’s very strange and repetitive.
Gorga is now talking to the camera about his sister and it sounds ridiculous. It’s as if he is reading cue cards Melissa wrote. He has his own mind and his own opinions, yet whenever he speaks it is as though he is reading notes to us from his wife. Melissa has been forcing tension and in the end it backfired because we are sick of it, and not that interested in her.
Jac is making dinner for the Manzo’s and I am checked out. By checked out of course I mean I am now drinking wine. Chris is talking about the trip to Napa and Jac wants to know why Juicy and Tre are going since they don’t get along with anyone. Jac looks horrible, is acting like a spoiled brat, and seems to think we care about her. She is a bitch and I’m over her.
Kathy and Rosie’s mom Maria is making dinner and Kathy’s family is all together. Rich is telling Rosie she needs to get a girlfriend, Kathy is saying she will go gay bar hopping with her, and I think Kathy’s view of her sister’s gay lifestyle has been altered by the show. She’s probably not been as open as she would like us to think. Something is being hidden here.
Back at Jac’s we learn that Albie is dating a new girl called Lindsay, who is a dancer. Greg looks crushed by it, which is hilarious. Between the fake girlfriend and Lauren talking about being fat, I’m done, then just when I think the scene could not get any worse, they start to crap all over Ashlee. No wonder this kid is a mess and can’t stand her family.
Caroline needs to shut the hell up when it comes to other peoples children, and Jac needs to stop throwing her kid under the bus every chance she gets. This show needs to get rid of Jac, Caroline and Melissa. We don’t care about them anymore and they have become too dark to recover from. Their own families can’t stand them so why should we?
Back at Rosie’s, Maria is talking about her childhood and it is very emotional. Her mother gave her away to her aunt when she was five and to hear her remember it is sad. She seems like a remarkable woman and I find myself wanting to hug her. By hug her of course I mean while I am over to her house for dinner. That woman can cook. This is a sweet family.
I would also like to say however, that I feel like Kathy searches the Internet for flowery things to say, then uses them on the show when she can. She’s not good at memorization though so she stumbles through trying to say something profound and so she just sounds dumb. I like her family more than her but if we get them thought her, then keep her.
Teresa tells the kids she is going out for lunch with Gorga and Milania steals the scene. This kid is television gold. Gorga is talking to Melissa and it sounds fake. She could care less if they get along, he is saying what she told him to say, and none of it rings true. Meanwhile Jac’s dad is visiting from Vegas and they decide to bash Ashlee on camera a little more.
Not only do they trash Ashlee, but they also bash Teresa. Her dad is saying not everyone is as good of a friend as Jac is and I’m laughing because Jac is not a good friend. She is also a horrible fake crier. Shaking your voice is dumb with no tears Jac. Grow up. We are not buying it. Tre is lucky to be rid of you and your gossiping ways. Know that.
It is time for the much anticipated therapy session between Gorga and Teresa. He tells her red is sexy and she tells him he smells good. Awkward. We meet Michael, the newest fake therapist on Bravo’s payroll. He seems annoyed, clearly has an agenda, and all I want to do it pluck my own hair out just to be distracted from the garbage on my television.
Teresa meets with the “therapist” and says it has nothing to do with her. Gorga meets with the “therapist” and says all the things Melissa told him to. I believe both of them in that it is their truth, but this fake doctor is not going to help them. The “therapist” tells Joe they need to be smart how they work together and I am officially done with the fake doctor.
Important to note the fake doctor is actually a real doctor. The fake part comes in play in terms of his appearing on television. Giving therapy on reality television is creepy and seems a little unethical. Is the money so good that you are willing to risk your reputation talking to crazy people? I’m thinking not so much.
Teresa and Joe are talking and it’s weird because they are showing them talking at night at the fake doctor’s office, but they were there at lunchtime. Where they there shooting for hours? Joe is pissed there are tabloid stories about them, Joe thinks Teresa sold the stories, and I think it was Caroline who is on a mission to hurt Teresa.
We flash over to Kathy and Rosie at a gay bar and it’s forced and weird. Rosie is a sweet girl, quite pretty, and inherently kind. She will meet a nice woman and watching her whore herself out on Bravo is a shame. Kathy is hammered, probably because she was uncomfortable, and she is making a fool out of herself. Thank goodness this episode is over.
I used to really love this show, and I suppose I still do on some level, but Bravo is pushing my limit. We cannot keep watching all the fighting. There is very little interaction that is entertaining, and it has become a bash Teresa show, and Tre is on the defensive so much she is being taken out of context. Nobody at Bravo seems to cares about keeping it real.
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