February 13, 2012 | 9:09 am
Posted by Ilana Angel
These episodes in Africa have proven two things to the world. One: Africa is glorious and everyone should visit if they are given the opportunity, and two: these women are embarrassing and should not be allowed to travel. If I lived in Atlanta I would be mortified that these women are what is representing my city. These chicks are a mess.
Before we get started, I’d like to address Bravo for a minute. Really Bravo? Why is there so much recapping? You don’t need three weeks of shows in Africa if it’s all recapping and barely two episodes of original footage. It’s annoying that we watch, are loyal, and you recap things excessively as if we are morons and can’t remember what we’ve seen already.
The talls go out for dinner on their own, then head to a club. The smalls leave their party and head over to meet them. Sheree is confused by why Marlo was so upset about not being included, and Marlo is acting like a fool. The smalls arrive at the club, Marlo hugs Phaedra and Kandi, then flips the bird to Sheree. Marlo is ridiculous which in this group is pathetic.
Marlo is throwing cash around, clearly in an attempt to prove to Sheree she has more money than her, so Kandi and Phaedra start picking up the money and putting it in their clothes. Phaedra is hilarious and says she needs new shoes, Pampers, and souvenirs. Phaedra cracks me up and it’s sweet she is thinking about her baby and husband back home.
In the car ride home from the club NeNe needs potato ships, or soup, which I thought was funny. It’s a clear division of smalls and talls although Phaedra and Kandi are being nice in the group. Marlo lets us know her sugar daddy was sixty not eighty, and she loved it. I think Marlo is pretty, but she strikes me as very manly and I’m curious about her men.
The ladies get to their safari location, Shamwari Game Reserve, which is fantastic. They meet the staff and hear about the amenities. Everyone is asking about the gym, the spa, and then Marlo wants to know about hair and makeup. She is told they don’t have it, so asks them to bring someone in. Really? Why does Marlo need to many female touchups? Hmmm.
They are getting a tour of the rooms and there are four fabulous rooms and two more old fashioned rooms. They put al the names in a bowl and draw for beds. The two less fabulous rooms, which for the record are fabulous, go to Marlo and NeNe. The smalls are gloating a little that they scored the “better” locations on their FREE TRIP TO AFRICA. Losers.
Africa is beautiful and it’s sad to me that these women get a free ride to paradise when they don’t seem to appreciate it at all. Phaedra, Sheree, Kandi and Cynthia are at breakfast, waiting for Marlo and Nene who are getting hair and makeup done to go on a Safari. They are dressed to the nines and wearing 6 inch heels which is offensive.
Marlo is decked in designer fabulous from head to toe and thinks she “looks Safari”. Too funny. The smalls are certain Marlo is going to push Cynthia out of her bond with NeNe, and Marlo is a pretentious ass and embarrassing herself. NeNe gets flowers from creepy Italian guy John, and it’s weird. I love NeNe but she needs someone less odd.
The smalls are making fun of Marlo, and then when they get the cars to go, there is clearly room for all of them to go in one car, but they are told they are going in two cars, which is stupid, and bad forced drama from Bravo. Putting them all together would have been better in the long run over the one second of drama in separating them.
NeNe mentions they can all fit together but the split happens quickly and the safari is on. Marlo will not stop talking, she tells the driver to shoot animals in the head, and complains that the roads need to be paved because it’s too bumpy. I love the tour guids and feel the need to write them and say sorry. NeNe is freaking out at the site of a turtle.
The smalls come across giraffes and instead of taking in the awe of it all, they are making fun of Nene and Marlo. They come across elephant dung, which to me would be exciting that they are close by, and the girls are asking what size an elephants ass is that he can make such a big poop. Really? These chicks are a nightmare and I am embarrassed for them.
They see zebras and Marlo let’s us know she has a zebra rug in her home and I am just grossed out by her. The ladies are on a search for a tiger and when they hear there are no tigers in Africa, only lions, they are shocked. These girls are dumb and I want to slap them upside the head and tell them to grow up and appreciate where they are lucky enough to be.
The ladies go to a school and an orphanage, and it’s heartbreaking to me. The kids are really beautiful and it seems off to me that they are brought out for a little show. Phaedra says buying them supplies and treats is the right thing to do, which I agree, but it’s the visit that I find troubling. Is it not sad for these kids to see people coming in and out of their lives?
If I were waiting for a family, I don’t know that foreigners coming in and out would make me happy. I’m not an expert, and it’s just my opinion, but I suggest you read these articles by Tamara Tattles and Black Girl Travel. They take a look inside the business of visiting orphanages in Africa and show what this trip could have, and should have been.
The ladies in the car passing out things to the children on the side of the road is very upsetting to me. I’m not sure why I was so offended, but it made me cry and I find myself angry at Bravo for not using these episodes as an opportunity to raise money for these people. Put a number on the screen to help them instead of showing these fools crying.
The ladies take a picture with a class of young kids and you know they are going to show the pictures around Atlanta and talk about how it changed their lives when you know it didn’t. It was disrespectful to me, and while I was not there, it was edited in a way that was just not cool. Nice they bought so much stuff, but where is the big picture? Sorry if that offends.
Next week is the final week of Africa and it will be full of ungrateful and entitled women prancing around making fools out of themselves, with a guest appearance by Kim. This show is getting on my nerves and this week left me very unsatisfied. I’ll be back next week of course, but I imagine it will be another hour of nobody really keeping it real.
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12.10.13 at 8:55 am | Carlton can stay, Joyce should go.
12.8.13 at 9:55 pm | Momma Joyce is all kinds of crazy.
12.7.13 at 8:49 am | What the hell is Bravo giving us?
12.7.13 at 7:29 am | I'm not going to lie, these women and the men. . .
12.3.13 at 10:31 am | Liar, liar, pants on fire.
12.2.13 at 7:09 pm | Second week in a row of boring television.
12.3.13 at 10:31 am | Liar, liar, pants on fire. (3404)
12.10.13 at 8:55 am | Carlton can stay, Joyce should go. (2940)
12.7.13 at 8:49 am | What the hell is Bravo giving us? (1527)