January 13, 2010 | 2:35 pm
Posted by Mihal Levy
Dear Mr. Brennan, Mr. Falchuk and Mr. Murphy (or anyone who knows them or is related to someone who knows them who can introduce me to them),
I was going to write about auditioning for Glee before I even heard about the open call for auditions for next season. So you can imagine how excited I was to hear that you will actually be holding auditions. I have a great idea that I wanted to run by you (not that your ideas are not great, please don’t get me wrong). Here is my idea: How about hiring me for a role on Glee, or at least an audition? (You didn’t see that one coming, did you?)
Ok, I know what you are thinking: why me? Well, let me tell you. (First, let me think about it for a bit.) I guess being a fan of the show doesn’t cut it. (I even drudged up an old headshot of mine for your review - doesn’t everyone who lives in L.A. have one on file? It’s not thaaaaat old, by the way.) So, here are the top ten reasons I came up with why I should be on Glee.
1) I met many members of the cast on a few occasions and we got along. (That’s a plus, right?)
2) I have a background in musical theater - off-Broadway, of course…way off, in fact. Let’s just say more to the west…way west - California. Which is where I performed in high school. (My high school drama teacher is a Facebook friend, so she can confirm the fact. I am sure she remembers me…vaguely. High school was a while ago…but not too long ago.)
3) I can sing. (Ask my three-year-old son.) You should hear me in the car.
4) I have been told that I look like I could be Lea Michele’s younger sister, even though I am older (hint-new character). This is probably because I am a member of the tribe. We all look alike, don’t we?
5) I studied music and sang throughout college as well (but got my degree in psychology. Maybe I shouldn’t mention that last part…so, scratch that.)
6) Please change the open call age limit from 26 years old and add just a few years. I know you probably hear it all the time, but I don’t look my age…or better yet, even act my age. (Just a side note - Stockard Channing was 32 when she played Rizzo in Grease.)
7) I have a sense of humor, or don’t (depending on what you are looking for.)
8) I work well with children and animals…and adults and producers and actors and directors and…you get the point.
9) I don’t require special perks on my rider.
10) And if I am a little off-key, there is always Auto-Tune.
And I know the drill, “Don’t call us, we’ll call you.” So I won’t be calling you (because that would just be stalking at this point), but I will wait for your call or email or text message or IM or Facebook request or Twitter direct message…
By the way, I even have my audition mashup ready to go: Bette Midler’s “The Rose” and Depeche Mode’s “Blasphemous Rumors.”
Jew Mama, a.k.a. Mihal Levy
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