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Hollywood Jew

September 28, 2010 | 9:30 am

The Social Network: Mark Zuckerberg created Facebook to get girls (just not Jewish girls)

Posted by Danielle Berrin

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Mark Zuckerberg

In the film “The Social Network”, writer Aaron Sorkin insinuates that one of the central drives in Mark Zuckerberg’s development of Facebook was the hot-blooded pursuit of women.

A little embarrassed, Zuckerberg denies this. And to counter the claim, he has publicly promised not to see the film. When he appeared on Oprah last week to announce a $100 million gift to the Newark public school system, the media queen cannily called the film “unauthorized.” It’s a refrain Zuckerberg has repeated for months now.

“I started Facebook to improve the world and make it a more transparent place,” he told TheWrap.com’s Sharon Waxman in July at a media conference in Sun Valley.

“This movie portrays me as someone who built Facebook so I could meet girls.”

Much is being made of the filmmaking ethics that allow Hollywood to create a character out of Zuckerberg, who is still only in his twenties, and who will soon become internationally famous according to Aaron Sorkin’s rendering of him (Sorkin’s Zuckerberg is complex and sympathetic, but unflattering).   

“It’s a new kind of license to turn a real-life 26-year-old whose most life changing decisions were made as a teenager into an incarnation of Silicon Valley killer instinct, undergrad dorkdom, impatient brilliance, and middle-class Jewish-American aspiration fighting the Wasp Establishment,” New York Magazine’s Mark Harris wrote about the film. “Sorkin’s version of Zuckerberg is a young man pounding on the door, driven by his desire to get in” – to places of power and acceptance—but also, “away from the Jewish fraternity that symbolizes his lack of access to the inner circle.”

Let’s assume for a moment that Sorkin’s version of Zuckerberg contains some strand of truth. And that there was a time when a brilliant, geeky Harvard student hopelessly fantasized about sex – just not with a Jewish girl.

In one of the film’s early scenes, Zuckerberg and friends are partying at the Jewish fraternity Alpha Epsilon Pi, on “Caribbean Night”, when they observe a group of Asian-American young women dancing in a cluster.

“There’s an algorithm for the connection between Jewish guys and Asian girls,” one of Zuckerberg’s friends says wryly. “They’re hot, smart, not Jewish and can dance.”
 
Sorkin would have us believe that in the eyes of some Jewish men – or at least, you know, those run-of-the-mill Harvard scholars – one of the best things about being an Asian woman is that she isn’t a Jewish woman.  If this were pure fiction, it might sting a little less, but unfortunately it isn’t: Zuckerberg, who might be the most eligible Jewish bachelor in the world met his current girlfriend, Chinese-American medical student Priscilla Chan on erev Shabbat at an AEPi party during his sophomore year.

In a single sentence in a recent New Yorker profile of Zuckerberg, one of the few in-depth interviews he has ever conducted, writer Jose Antonio Vargas shattered the hopes of single Jewish women everywhere and gave the Jewish world yet another reason to fret over its future by suggesting Zuckerberg is on the road to intermarriage.

“Friends expect Chan and Zuckerberg to marry,” Vargas wrote in the Sept. 20, 2010 issue. He also noted that the couple moved in together in early September – which Zuckerberg announced on his Facebook page, of course,—and that they will vacation together in China this winter, a trip Zuckerberg is preparing for by learning Mandarin.

But ladies, don’t pin your hopes on the word ‘expect’ just yet. Because there is a more sinister undercurrent to the film’s assumption that for some Jewish men – and perhaps Mark Zuckerberg – being a Jewish woman is a turn-off.

Last year, during an interview with young, newcomer producers Gabe and Alan Polsky, who produced Werner Herzog’s remake of “The Bad Lieutenant” and are the heirs to an energy fortune, the question of whether or not they would marry within the tribe was met with vexation and displeasure.

“I don’t even want to breach that [topic],” Alan Polsky said hastily. “I don’t want to get into that question; I’m not going to say anything.” “And,” he added, turning towards his brother, “I don’t think you should either.”

Too late.

“I’ll tell you what,” Gabe explained, “Jewish girls were very difficult growing up…”

“Where we grew up, they were very spoiled,” Alan conceded.

They said tthe Jewish girls they knew were “clique-y.”

“Very clique-y,” Alan said. But he admitted that coming from immigrant parents, they often felt out of place. “So I think we have a tendency to be overly skeptical.”

Phew, because, read another way, their remarks could be seen as an indictment of the Jewish woman nobody likes: the whiny, spoiled, entitled, high-maintenance, overly-dependent-on-her-parents Jewish American Princess, the jap. We’ve all met her; the overindulged sorority girl who drives a more expensive car than most working adults and tends to start conversations by commenting on the brand of your handbag or asking if those are seriously the new Tory Burch shoes. 

If college-age Jewish girls are doomed to the jap stereotype, adult Jewish women face another: the smart/strong duality that inevitably leads to The Jewish Mother. And that stereotype comes with another set of flattering adjectives like domineering, overbearing, controlling, smothering etc., but cannot exist without its equal and opposite: the weak, silent Jewish male. All of these, obviously, are egregiously unfair (alright, except for the overbearing Jewish mother part), but they do exist in the culture and the notion is front and center in “The Social Network.”

In the film’s memorable opening scene, the exquisitely articulate young woman whom Zuckerberg is dating dumps him after he insults her a million different ways. He retaliates, on his blog, with a dig about how her family changed their name from “Albright” to “Albrecht”.

If all Jewish women were japs, it makes sense why someone like Zuckerberg, who in real-life is known for his modest lifestyle and disinterest in wealth—and in the film, his resentment of privilege—wouldn’t want to tie the knot with a Jewish girl. Zuckerberg is more interested in changing the world than possessing it.

Which sounds like some Jewish women I know. In fact, you don’t have to look far to find Jewish women who are at the top of their fields in any number of fields to realize just how wrong the jap stereotype is: Anne Frank, Golda Meir, Madeline Albright, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Elena Kagan, Ayn Rand, Natalie Portman, Rachel Weisz, Elizabeth Taylor, Queen Esther… the list goes on and on. Which leads me to believe that it isn’t Jewish women that are the problem. It’s that Jewish men like Mark Zuckerberg and Aaron Sorkin are hanging out with the wrong ones.

More on Mark Zuckerberg:
Facebook’s Mark Zuckerberg can’t handle his own spotlight

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I have to agree. He just hasn’t met the right one yet. I’ve had some good luck and found a great woman (who happens to be Jewish) take me as her husband.

Comment by James on 9/28/10 at 10:37 am

To “disprove” Zuckerberg, you START with Anne Frank?  A girl hidden in an attic who hardly had a chance to buy food, let alone the latest designer handbag (as if anyone did during the war in Holland, anyway), and THEN, Golda Meir?  Also, I don’t know if actresses Rachel Weisz and Natalie Portman are exactly anti-materialistic, even if they do engage in some philanthropy (which is always a good PR photo op for actors, too).

Zuckerberg was talking about the kind of girls who live here and NOW in the Ivy League especially, the world of privilege, OR yes, right here in LA, on the westside.  Where what bag you carry, car you drive and so on ARE the currency of young people in top high schools as well as among their parents’ set.  It IS a materialistic, nouveau riche world, polar opposite of the low-kay world of old money WASP wealth he’s trying to emulate, the Buffett types, those who drive the same old car and live in the same old house despite accumulating oodles of wealth.  The ones who prize heirlooms and antiques over the latest stainless steel appliances and acres of granite and walls of glass.

Ironically, he found himself a Chinese-American girl of an immigrant family - also known for being nouveau-riche, the “new Jews” to the WASP “elite.”  And from what I hear among my Chinese girlfriends in college, their mothers encourage them to find white husbands, “it’s higher status.”  Why ELSE would they be gravitating to a JEWISH fraternity, for Pete’s sake?  (How many WASP girls do the same?  Sorry to shell out more stereotypes, but THEY look for the strong, macho husbands on the whole - not the nerdy smart ones.)

So while Zuckerberg may shun Jewish girls who are too spoiled and whiny and materialistic, he may also be going for a girl who thinks HE is more of “a catch.”

However, despite all this and although the jap stereotype exists because it’s true enough often enough, my smartest and funniest girlfriends are all Jewish - once we get PAST the materialistic stuff that is part of the westside LA/ Eastside New York etc., DNA.

Comment by hedia on 9/28/10 at 8:37 pm

Mark Zuckerberg is not in love with a stereotype, or a non-stereotype. He’s in love with a person.

The Jewish world is going to blow it again, like it did with negative reactions to Chelsea Clinton’s wedding. This movie is going to generate many more comments like Berrin’s complaining that Jewish men aren’t interested in Jewish women and are on the road to intermarriage. It would be a lot smarter if the Jewish reaction to Mark Zuckerberg and Priscilla Chan would be a great big “mazel tov, welcome to our community.”

For more see http://www.interfaithfamily.com/smf/index.php?article=3898

Comment by Edmund Case on 9/30/10 at 3:37 am

In Israel there’s a similar stereotype, it’s called ‘Frekha’ - an arabic word, but the difference is that it’s always said about materialistic, whiny Mizrahi girls, never about Ashkenazi girls like it is in the US

Comment by FreeMind on 9/30/10 at 7:06 am

This article is the absolute truth.  Edmund Case doesn’t like it because it hits too close to home.  His group pushes a pro-intermarriage and anti-Jewish women agenda.  According to him Jewish women are expendable in the Jewish community, and non-Jewish women can do an equal or even better job of raising Jewish children.  This of course is complete nonsense and just another attack against Jewish women by a Jewish man.

Comment by Alina on 9/30/10 at 1:49 pm

I still don’t know why anyone would want to get on facebook and share their personal information with the world or even their friends??????sounds stupid

Comment by Ben Koen on 2/09/11 at 12:15 pm

I agreed with this article.  So unfair to Jewish women.  I don’t know why people would want to share their personal info. either.  You don’t know who is out there.  Have you thought of the reason why Chan once broke up with Zuch and come back after he is richer than year before?  My Chinese friends once told me White American majority are rich and there parent are very welcome when bring them home.  Sure, they are looking for higher status ladder to climb.

Comment by non Jewish on 5/14/11 at 2:06 pm

He bought up by Jewish parents, why is he denying he is Jewish?  Is he ashame of being Jewish?

Comment by J on 5/14/11 at 2:16 pm

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