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June 22, 2009 | 10:45 pm

Bruno’s Top Five Jewish Moments

Posted by Naomi Pfefferman

Bruno

Universal Pictures has issued an embargo on reviews until the day before “Bruno’s” July 10 release, but here are some top Jewish moments from Sacha Baron Cohen’s highly anticipated (and litigious) mock documentary about a flamboyant gay fashionista who aspires to become the “biggest Austrian superstar since Hitler.”

1) When Bruno fails to achieve uber-fame by solving the problems in Darfur, he comforts himself with the knowledge that “luckily, there is still one sh—hole left to fix in the world:  “The Middle East”  (or “Middle Earth,” as he calls it).  But he doesn’t make many friends while traipsing in a black hat, pais and a speedo through a religious area in Israel, where enraged residents chase him out of the ‘hood. 
2) Bruno conducts dialogues between Israeli and Arab leaders, including an ex-Mossad chief and a Palestinian mayor of Jerusalem.  Alas, he confuses the word “hummus” with “Hamas.”
3) Bruno decides the best way to become famous is to be kidnapped by Muslim extremists, and so visits a leader of Al-Aqsa Martyrs Brigade in a refugee camp in Lebanon. “I want the best guys in the business.  Al Qaeda is so 2001,” he tells the man. “Your king Osama looks like a dirty wizard or a homeless Santa Claus,” he adds.  Needless to say, Bruno gets kicked out rather than kidnapped.
4) Bruno and his manager, desperate to land celebrity interviews, consult a chart they have made of top actors.  There is “Wilhelm Schmidt” (Will Smith), Adolf Pittler (Brad Pitt) and lastly, a man Bruno calls “Der Fuhrer.”  The camera pans to reveal the photograph of said star:  Mel Gibson.

5) After congressman Ron Paul pronounces Bruno a “queer,” the fashionista laments, “I couldn’t even shtup Rupaul (sic).  How am I going to get famous?

22 Comments — Leave your comment

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As a proud gay Muslim American i am very sad. Why would Bruno bash our community?
We are the most spiritual people and we proud to be homosexuals. My husband Hassan is a Palestinian and we have a great family life with our 2 adopted kids.

Comment by Yaakov Sullivan on 7/05/09 at 8:27 pm

That is beautiful Yaakov but have you already forgotten that your husband’s name is Moshe and is from Hebron (the best gay community: Kiryat Arba)

Comment by Friend of Yaakov on 7/06/09 at 2:04 am

Sacha is a f** genius
Living in the true jewish tradition of 2009 Charlie Chaplin
Typical, loud, outspoken, nothing to lose
Telling stories as he goes where no man has gone before
we solute you; your brother jews

Comment by Joey Butterfuecko on 7/06/09 at 11:49 am

HE HAS DONE MORE HARM TO THE JEWISH PEOPLE THAN YOU
“HOLLYWOOD JEWS” WILL EVERN KNOW OR CARE ABOUT
WHAT RIGHT TO PEOPLE OF DISTANT JEWISH CONNECTIONS HAVE TO EVEN CALL THEMSELVES JEWS. BEING JEWISH IS PART OF MORAL SYSTEM WHICH SACHA COHEN IS NOT THE REMARK ABOVE OF TYPICAL JEWISH LOUD OUTSPOKEN NOTHING TO LOSE IS STUPID AND DANGEROUS ONLY ADVOCATED BY NON JEWISH JEWS
WHO HAVENT A CLUE WHAT TO BE A JEW MEANS.

Comment by DAVID on 7/07/09 at 2:17 am

David, what is a “non-Jewish Jew”? This is a new one to decide who is in the group and who is out.

Comment by Curious on 7/07/09 at 6:48 pm

non jewish jew is a term set up by isaac deutscher to describe a type of jews no longer affirming religious tradition and rules. you can read his text from 1968 on-line

Comment by hanno on 7/08/09 at 12:28 am

Sacha helps us to see the see the boundaries of our prejudice. He holds up a mirror in which we see our own ugliness. I have seen the movie and it was offensive, outrageous and irreverent BUT at its heart it was very very Jewish. His brash characters may not appeal to all, but to me this is a very Jewish approach - it is a new twist on the very old Jewish humour. By the way I am Da’ati and made Aliyah 2 years ago.

Comment by Shmuel on 7/08/09 at 6:45 am

Sascha Baron Cohen may be Jewish, but his wife and child are not.

Comment by Mordechai on 7/08/09 at 11:20 pm

pensacola florida is a cess pool.  the local police force dominated by aryan nation hate mongers who cover up their crimes against minorities, especially jews and muslims. rise up south florida.

Comment by Messianics Perish in He11 on 7/09/09 at 12:17 am

Shalom, Salam - I am Bruno’s brother, the half arab one, you know we are all cousins. Tell you what, he slammed all and sundry, jews, arabs, gays, yanks, kazaks, and best of all Austrians. So what, as an Arab I love this guy and if he is jewish, hey man you just got one Arab one step closer to the jewish community. Funny thing - I love Jewish dry humour, and if we can’t laugh at what makes us different, then we are in for another sorry round of bloodshed which needs to stop. Think about it, didn’t we all laugh at the fanatics among both of our camps and can’t we see how only through rational peace and acceptance of one another could we live together as we always had in centuries past, in peace and fraternity. Shalom my Jewish friends, from your Arab cousin

Comment by bassam on 7/11/09 at 9:23 pm

Jewish humor is the best in the world specialy if is presented by a Jew. Unfortunatly the religus Jewish fanatics have losted somwhere in the pages of talmud.Thank you Sasha you have my total respect and that you can seperate yours private live from yours job as a fantastc entertainer.

Comment by mirawayne on 7/12/09 at 5:14 pm

TO DAVID:

No doubt you are into conspiracy theories about Jews (and probably a number of other groups as well). I sincerely suggest that most people with your mindset are mentally ill to some degree or another. This forum therefore is not appropriate for you.

I would pity people like you - if your trashy and sick
ideas didnt sometimes have a negative impact on the rest of society. I suggest the reason you dislike and even hate film parodies like this is because they force the sick minds in society to look in the mirror and see the ugliness for what it is.

Yes, it is people like you who have issues (and not the groups of people you accuse). Rather than reading trashy websites and “literature” accusing Jews (of being “khazars” and fake etc)... why dont you try to get along with your fellow man and do everyone a favor (including yourself) and get psychological help.

Comment by jon on 7/13/09 at 6:13 am

Mordechai:  you are incorrect.  His girlfriend converted and his kid is being raised Jewish.  That may not be “enough” for the racist/super-Orthodox, but it is good enough for most Jews.  Not that it makes a difference, mind you.  But his wife and child are Jewish.

Comment by Anon on 7/13/09 at 11:01 am

Respect to all peace loving cultures!!  Religion is all about my blue rock is better than your red rock.  Silly.

Comment by goyim shakur on 7/15/09 at 7:27 am

Funny movie folks

Comment by How To Outsource on 7/19/09 at 6:43 pm

Sacha has done more to endear people to Jewish culture than the average Jewish person David. I was at an airport recently where there were two Orthodox Jewish guys rocking back and forward and muttering loads of religious stuff (because the sun was rising I think) for absoloutely AGES. It looked awkward and mentally ill. Is that what you want? Only serious and respectful religious types? NO WAY - GET OFF IT, DAVY BABY!!

Comment by Ortho-Doxy on 7/20/09 at 12:49 pm

Religion has ruled in commoners soul forever. Time for a change.

Comment by Hardwood Flooring Orange County on 10/31/09 at 12:11 am

More Jews are going to see Bruno than are going to do many other Jewish activities, so let’s figure out, as a People, to have some fun and find meaning from it all. Below is the article from the LA Jewish Journal with the top Jewish highlights of the movie, which debuted on July 10.

Comment by Manitowoc Ice Machine on 11/09/09 at 6:54 am

Even before the movie had been seen by anyone, news of Cohen’s gotcha filmmaking style began to spread. The most buzzed-about was a staged mixed martial-arts match, in which Bruno grappled with another man in front of an Arkansas crowd drawn by the promise of violence, cheap beer and women. When the “Blue Collar Brawlin’” transformed into a sexy gay make-out session, and the pair stripped down to their underwear, the crowd reaction quickly turned. Because one guy wrapping his legs around another guy and squeezing him into submission is one thing, but doing it in his underwear? Not cool.

Comment by Movie on 11/10/09 at 5:06 pm

What can we expect from Sacha Baron Cohen’s latest film? Well, if you’ve seen Da Ali G Show, Ali G In Da House and Borat, then you know exactly what to expect: ridiculous accents, over-the-top risque humor and unsuspecting Americans caught on film doing and saying things that they probably should have thought twice about. Of course, Bruno has a lot to live up to, because Cohen has been shocking America (and Britain) for years.

Comment by Elevator Shoes on 11/10/09 at 5:09 pm

how are you? ok
well i like this site.
first, i don’t know much about Sacha Baron Cohen. but, i know keanu reeves.
anyway, happy new year 2010 god bless us
thank you

Comment by hari wibowo on 12/27/09 at 11:27 am

EUROPE ALLOWS RELIGIOUS OPPRESSION

This is a part of the instance against the European Court of Human Rights
  and the European Union for failing to
  protect Juvenile people

Hello

  I am Vasileios T. from Greece.

  We Europeans and our European Court
  MUST CHANGE SOME RULES
  ABOUT RELIGIOUS RIGHTS IN EUROPEAN COUNTRIES

  It is ILLIGAL for the European Court of Human Rights
  not to protect Human Rights for ANY REASON.

  I know that each country has the right to regulate alone
  religious guidance and educational propaganda
  to unformed and deceivable juvenile.

  Juvenile people (yes, they are people with rights) have not yet
  developed the intellectual defence to filter religious propaganda,
  and to develop unaffected individual view about the object of
  the religious propaganda and the religion it self.

  According to official scientific researches but also
  according to ALMOST EVERY LEGAL SYSTEM
  Juvenile People are not physically and mentally ready
  to be expected to cope with the same issue
  with the same effectiveness of an adult.

  Therefore Juvenile People are not mentally ready to cope with
  religious propaganda.

  Juvenile People are protected by the law more than adults
  in many cases, even if they are the victimizer
  because they are more prone to incorrect decisions,
  due to their youth and immaturity.

  The religion we believe as true is not imprinted to our DNA
  but is a result mainly of adscititious factors.

  We have no right to eliminate the factors which make us
  choose a religion.

  WE DO NOT ONLY HAVE THE LEGAL RIGHT
  BUT WE MUST
  PROTECT JUVENILE PEOPLE
  ACCORDING TO
  THE EUROPEAN COURT OF HUMAN RIGHTS!

  According to the current laws
  The European Court of Human Rights has NO RIGHT to force
  any European Country
  to RESPECT JUVENILE PEOPLE.

  This law contradicts against the fundamental Human Rights and laws
  that the European Court of Human Rights defends.

  Therefore I will prosecute the European Court of Human Rights
  and the European Union for failing to
  protect Juvenile people.

  The prosecution will be deposited to
  the European Court of Human Rights.

  The European Court of Human Rights was instituted
  to protect Human Rights.

  Many times, all the legal systems
  have some juristic incoherences, because it’s very hard
  to enact laws.

  In those cases, the legislator has to harmonize
  the secondary laws to the fundamental law.
  This fact does not constitute oddness, but basic
  legislative process to all juristical systems.

  The new countries which enter the European Union,
  MUST RESPECT THE HUMAN RIGHTS
  AND THE RIGHTS OF JUVENILE PEOPLE.

  If the European Union
  and the European Court of Human Rights
  do not harmonize the law
  THAT ALLOWS COUNTRIES
  TO INFRINGE RELIGIOUS RIGHTS
  of adults and juvenile people,
  to the FUNDAMENTAL RIGHTS
  that the European Union
  and the European Court of Human Rights
  defend relentlessly,

  I will be perforced to appeal to
  the European Court of Human Rights
  against the European Union
  and also against the European Court of Human Rights,
  asking from them to respect the fundamental rights
  that the European Union and
  the European Court of Human Rights
  defend.

  I will have to ask for nomothetic act of harmonization
  to the most fundamental law.
  Namely harmonization to the laws that protect
  juvenile people, religious freedom and HUMAN RIGHTS,
  because the people who don’t follow the
  Governmental religion, unavoidably are considered OUTCASTS.

  If the European Union and
  the European Court of Human Rights decide to officially stop
  protecting Human Rights by legislative act and new
  European treaty,
  I will no longer demand
  from them to protect Human Rights.

  But as long as the European Union
  and the European Court of Human Rights are
  the supreme legal and statutory stern defenders
  of Human Rights, I have all the legal rights to
  ask for nomothetic reconcilement, even for
  satisfaction (amends).

  The European Court of Human Rights
  knows this jurisprudential incoherence.

  If the European Court of Human Rights
  would fail to defend Human Rights
  and would not go along to this legislative harmonization
  I will appeal to the International Court of Justice (ICJ).

  The International Court of Justice will not demand from
  the European Court of Human Rights
  and the European Union to follow specific religious policy
  for all European Countries.
  It will just demand from the European Court of Human Rights
  and the European Union just to harmonize their laws.
  To force them choose if they want to be fully apposite
  or fully inapposite as the legal defenders of Human Rights,
  and to eliminate juristic inconsistencies.

Comment by Vasileios on 1/20/10 at 4:50 pm

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