Jewish Journal

Sex, Love, and Food

by Beit T'shuvah

January 8, 2013 | 11:15 am

By Michael Welch

Let’s all do ourselves a favor and not deny the parallels between sex, food, and love. If you’re anything like me (and for health care’s sake, I hope you aren’t) the battle vacillates between mildly pleasant and unfortunately problematic. The following is a list of thoughts that connect the two and begin to demonstrate the relationship between them:

I am generally unable to enjoy myself when I eat because my mind is focused on my next feast. I do not eat “presently”; as my palate explodes with taste, I feel only the most fleeting moment of freedom. When people are discussing the presentation, taste, and accouterments of their food mid-chew, I look at Urban Spoon and collect data for my next gluttonous adventure. This trait is generalized with all human beings; be it with food or otherwise. Sheepishly, I’ve participated in thinking of another when I was with someone.

It’s difficult to be romantic or present when you’re starving; one of the only times I can put down the fork is when I’m in the preliminary infatuation phase. My sense of hunger becomes obsolete. Our bodies release a natural stimulant called norepinephrine that causes those feelings of butterflies, excitement, energy, and rapture. This may not make a lot of sense for the 1st dinner date idea; not to mention I’m not the biggest fan of smacking, salad in teeth, air sucking, jaw clicking, talking with food-in-mouth, spaghetti slurping, food moaning, projectile chewing, and my personal favorite; speed eating. The demonstration of the basic human needs here are uncanny, and more evidence of the union between these 3 hypotheses.

My efforts to make myself attractive are counteracted by food. When I am upset about my lack of sex appeal, I counter-intuitively comfort myself with food. Food and sex are not just coping mechanisms or bad habits; they are symbolic in nature. I tend to blur the lines between need and want, when instead I should be summoning spiritual inquisition in what I would like them to represent. I don’t believe this means being mindful every time I’m eating/with someone—that would destroy the passion and excitement. Instead, introducing consciousness of the feelings afterward could pose to be more informative.

I’d like to shy away from the message of satisfaction as I’m concerned it may destroy initiative. Instead, have an experience. Eat as much as you can (post what you eat on Instagram, it appears less self indulgent), enjoy who you like and get as many needs met as you possibly can. I do caution the repercussions, because food, sex, and love are so acutely connected. I would love to hear your experiences and if you believe that there is any bit of truth to this. Let’s break bread!

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