May 30, 2012 | 12:44 pm

Day 2639 - A Short Post about a Holy Soul: Neshama Carlebach

Posted by Salvador Litvak

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May it be Your will, HaShem, my G-d, that just as You have helped me complete Tractate Middos, so may You help me to begin other tractates and books, and to complete them; to learn and to teach, to safeguard and to perform, and to fulfill all the words of Your Torah’s teachings with love. (excerpt from the completion blessings for Tractate Middos)

What does it mean to fulfill the Torah’s teachings with love?

I’m sitting in the waiting area at LAX, my redeye to Boston delayed. Annoying, but I’m grateful that I finally have a moment to write an AT post. The past two weeks have been intense: mixing sound on Saving Lincoln, which means balancing 300 tracks of dialogue, score, and effects. Also prepping publicity materials. Continuing review of visual effects. Constantly making choices that have to be right.

I missed several dinners with my kids, though I usually made it home in time for the bedtime ritual. Combined with the morning routine, we had some quality time, but maybe it’s not enough. Perhaps I missed precious minutes with my kids that we can never recover. A different and heavier sort of pressure.

Meanwhile, Daf Yomi rolls on. I usually read early in the morning, before the kids are up. This week, I finished the penultimate tractate of the Talmud, Middos, which describes the Holy Temple in rich detail, as well as the daily order of the Kohens’ service there. It’s so visual and descriptive that one can get lost in the details. But it’s just as easy to glide over them and absorb nothing. What a waste that would be. Yet another kind of pressure.

Excitement is building toward the Siyum in August - a celebration of learning at Metlife Stadium in New Jersey, 100,000 Jews expected.
I’ve been asked to produce a documentary about the Talmud. I feel like I’m too busy to write this little blog! How can I possibly undertake such a task? And yet, if not me, whom?

It’s all aswirl in my head, but the thought that pierces through, and that I must write about, is the concert I attended last week in Alan Broidy’s living room.

Nina and I joined about 50 other guests for an intimate performance by Neshama Carlebach, daughter of Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach, z"l. Reb Shlomo was known as the singing rabbi - his melodies have spread throughout the Jewish world, and are now incorporated into services and rituals of every denomination. Uplifting, haunting, rallying, celebratory - he created tunes for every occasion and mood. What they all share, however, is a quality of always having been there, as if he discovered the songs rather than wrote them. A remarkable man who loved G-d and shared that love with his “holy brothers and sisters,” by which he meant all of us.

His music was a big part of my first film, When Do We Eat? In the process of making that happen, I spoke with Neshama on the phone a few times, and we included one of her songs on our CD. I never met her in person, however, until last week.

It cannot be easy to follow in the footsteps of such a spiritual and musical giant as Reb Shlomo, but Neshama does it. Her name means “soul” and oh my, hers is a special and holy neshama.

She sang beautifully. We were all captivated, singing along and clapping when appropriate, mesmerized when silence was better. What struck me most, however, was her light. Neshama loves G-d. She gets that we are all inside G-d, all part of G-d. And so she loves G-d by loving us. Words don’t really capture the feeling - they sound hippy-dippy when I reread them. But in her presence, I felt connected with the Shechinah, the female aspect of G-d’s presence.

To be less mystical about it, Neshama has the courage to proclaim her love of G-d in public. That’s not so easy in modern, educated society. One of the most brilliant guys I’ve ever known - valedictorian of our high school and now a renown scientist - recently told me how pleased he was to be an atheist with a capital “A.” Small “a” is for people who just don’t believe in G-d. Capital “A,” he tells me, is for people who’ve reasoned their way to a statistical certainty that there is no G-d.

I imagine he’d earn great praise at an academic cocktail party, and perhaps on the Op-Ed page of most major papers. Neshama, on the other hand, sings to the choir. When Alan invited me to the concert, he said, “You seem like the sort of guy who’d be moved by a Neshama Carlebach concert.”

“Absolutely,” I answered.

We know each other from synagogue. He’s seen me sing with all my heart. I’m not a good singer - I just do it anyway because it brings me closer to G-d. I love G-d, and I try to tell Him so every day. I don’t say it much in public, however, and I even feel a bit exposed as I write these words. Perhaps because I spend so much time among people like my valedictorian friend. G-d talk is scary to Americans who are not connected with faith, and I can’t say I blame them. They don’t want to be told whether and how they should worship. That kind of freedom is what America is all about.

It’s a shame, however, that so many intelligent people reject faith a priori based on a few limited experiences of bad religion: empty worship, irrational prejudice, smug condescension - all these can be found among G-d’s followers and it’s a turn-off for people who are sincere in their hearts and simply haven’t had good faith-based experiences.

I just wish some of them could attend a Neshama concert, because she fulfills the Torah’s teachings with love. Palpable love.

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Salvador Litvak wrote and directed the Passover comedy and cult hit “When Do We Eat?” His current film, “Saving Lincoln”, explores Abraham Lincoln’s fiery trial as Commander-in-Chief through the eyes of his dear friend and bodyguard, Ward Hill Lamon.

May 11, 2012 | 7:29 pm

Day 1575 - The Honor Due to My Wife

Posted by Salvador Litvak

R’ Chelbo said: A person must always be careful about his wife’s honor, because blessing is found in a person’s house only on account of his wife. (Bava Metzia 59a)

Seven years ago I experienced a minor miracle when I stumbled upon the Daf Yomi way of reading the entire Talmud (see Accidental Talmudist - Day One). When I arrived home that day, with the first book of the Talmud under my arm, I told my wife Nina about it.

She said, “You’re telling me today is the only day in seven years a person can start this thing? And because you happened to be in a bookstore this morning, you have to embark on this mammoth project?”

“Yes.”

“You’re kidding.”

“No…”

Being a great writer and researcher, Nina looked into it and learned I was not kidding. She thought about it, then she sat me down, and said, “In order to read the whole Talmud, you will need to subtract thousands of hours from our home and professional lives over the next seven years.” (Nina and I are a screenwriting team.)

I said, “Um, yeah, maybe it’s not such a good—”

“So, I will pick up the slack. Make sure you finish.”

At the time, our daughter was a toddler, and Nina was eight months pregnant. My doing Daf Yomi has been a huge challenge for both of us, but Nina kept up her end of the deal, and whatever reward I may receive for reading the whole Talmud, she will receive an equal portion. (see Sotah 21a)

As it is stated, And he treated Avram well on her account. (Bava Metzia 59a con’t)

It was also Nina who led us to write an Abraham Lincoln script (see Facebook.com/SavingLincoln), and Nina who has done most of the parenting while I’ve been working untold hours directing the movie. And it is Nina who keeps me grounded when I rush off on some creative or philosophical or intellectual… heck, any tangent will do for me. I’m an airy Gemini, she’s goal-oriented Sagittarius.

All of which is to say, I could not do what I do or be what I am without her. I don’t know why G-d has been so good to me, but I am profoundly grateful. In fact, I met Nina via minor miracle too.

New Year’s Eve, 1997. I was out with my buddies, getting a drink at El Coyote before attending some parties in the hills. I was waiting for a payphone (remember those?) and perched over a table where a beautiful gal was chatting with her friend. She was recently out of a relationship, reluctant to go out on New Years Eve, and only came because her friend insisted. I was smitten.

I barged in, and asked the ladies, “Are you going to a party tonight?”

“Yes,” said the friend.

“Well, you should come to the one my pals and I are going to - it’s going to be off the hook. Here’s the address.” Nina smiled.

Later, I was at the party. I’d been there for a couple of hours when I noticed Nina across the room, talking with some guy. I zoomed in, as if he wasn’t there.

“You came! I’m so glad…”

Nina and I discovered we have a million things in common, from screenwriting to Jewtino heritage.

Why was this a minor miracle? Because she didn’t come to the party on account of my invitation - she was going there anyway!

Nina is an amazing partner in every way. Sometimes we fight, because we’re passionate people who are staking everything on a creative venture. The pressure is pretty intense, and I make decisions all day: “Sal, should this shot be longer or shorter? More or less saturated? This take or that one? Music up-tempo or down? Lighting warmer or cooler? etc, etc.”

Then I get home, Nina asks a simple question like, “Thousand island or vinaigrette?” and I snap back, “Can’t you decide?”

At times like these, she’d be well within her rights to chew my head off. Recently, however, she sent me a beautiful excerpt from a book instead:

According to ancient esoteric thought, a wife is in effect the mirror of her husband - through her, he can see himself, his character traits, his strengths and weaknesses, and the like. Furthermore, the husband is like the sun and the wife is like the moon - she reflects his light. Accordingly, when she is short-tempered, he must rectify his problem with anger. When she is amiss in her responsibilities, he is most certainly faulty in fulfilling his obligations to G-d. (Garden of Emuna by Rabbi Shalom Arush)

In other words, never blame the lady of the house, because she knows best. As G-d told Abraham:

Whatever Sarah tells you, hearken to her voice. (Genesis 21:12)

Rashi says we learn from this verse that Abraham was inferior to Sarah in prophecy. What?! Abraham is the greatest prophet in history! The whole Judeo-Christian-Islamic monotheistic inheritance of the Western World springs from Abraham! According to G-d, however, Sarah knew better.

So, on this Mother’s Day, I want to pay special tribute to my partner in Torah, Talmud, parenting, life, and movies, Nina Davidovich Litvak. May we love forever.

Shabbat Shalom!

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Exchange ideas with Salvador Litvak and other Talmudists at facebook.com/accidentaltalmudist (and please LIKE the page to help enlarge our community)

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Salvador Litvak wrote and directed the Passover comedy and cult hit “When Do We Eat?” His current film, “Saving Lincoln”, explores Abraham Lincoln’s conflicted tenure as commander-in-chief through the eyes of his dear friend and bodyguard, Ward Hill Lamon.

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May 2, 2012 | 10:14 am

Accidental Talmudist: Day 271 - The Longer Shorter Way

Posted by Salvador Litvak

R’ Yehoshua ben Chananyah said: Once I was walking down the road and I saw a little boy sitting by a fork in the road, and I asked him, “Which is the road we take to the town?” He answered me, “This road is short and long, and this one is long and short.” (Eruvin 53b)

Two days ago, I was pretty stressed out. Professionally, I’m in the final and most difficult stretch of the biggest project of my life. So much depends on it, for me, for my team, for my family. It demands more hours and energy than I have. It is thrilling to be sure, but the stakes sometimes weigh me down.

Naturally, it was at just this period that I became the Accidental Talmudist, and now bear the added responsibility/privilege of sharing what I have learned during my voyage through Talmud - a voyage that still has three months to go. I still have my daily page to read, and I have only just caught up to the Daf Yomi schedule after falling 55 pages behind last summer, when the big project began.

Most importantly, I have in my house an eight-year old daughter, a seven-year old son, and my beloved wife Nina, each of whom deserves quality time with me.

And while all this is going on, I am counting the days from Passover to Shavuot, meditating on the 50 “Gates of Wisdom” in an effort to redeem myself from this year’s Pharaoh, carelessness, so I can free myself, G-d willing, from that defect in my character.

Two days ago, however, I felt like something’s gotta give, and it looked like it would be that meditative practice. I mean, heck, there just aren’t enough hours in the day!

And I went down the road which the boy described as “short and long.” When I approached the town, I discovered it was surrounded with gardens and orchards that blocked access to the town. (Eruvin 53b con’t)

The Lubavitcher Rebbe z”l, connects this Talmudic story about two roads to the Tanya - the foundation text of Chabad, written by Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi. Rabbi Zalman, also known as the Alter Rebbe, begins his book:

For this thing is very near to you, in your mouth and in your heart, that you may do it. (Deut 30:14)

The Torah is full of laws. It takes a year to read, and we reread it every year. The Talmud explores, specifies, amplifies, illustrates, and illuminates those laws in 72 thick volumes. It takes seven and a half years to read. That is a whole lot of information. Who can understand all of it, let alone observe it?

The Rebbe says we must endeavor to learn whatever we can, because G-d gave us the intellectual capacity to do it, and through this study we will come to comprehend our role in the Creation. Such an understanding will translate to our emotions, so that we will not give in to the urges of the Yetzer Hara, i.e. the evil inclination. And eventually, we will dedicate ourselves entirely to doing G-d’s will, and thereby unite with the Holy One. Such a person is entirely a blessing to his or her family, community, tribe, and indeed, the whole world.

Few get there. Yet all benefit themselves and their loved ones by trying. It is a long journey, with a true reward. This is the longer shorter way.

Sounds great. But isn’t it enough to be a good person, make an honest living, and follow the rules everyone else follows, without necessarily understanding all the deep meanings? Especially when you’re mortally busy?

No, says the Rebbe, that is the shorter longer way. Like R’ Yehoshua’s first inclination to to take the path straight to the town, it is misleadingly simple and doomed to frustration, anger and misery. We all have souls that recognize the difference between purpose and purposelessness. If one simply marches along without seeking meaning, he may win battle after battle, but the war will be lost.

I turned back and I said to the boy, “My son, did you not tell me that this road is short?” He said to me, “And did I not also tell you that it is long?” I kissed him on the head, and I said to him, “Praiseworthy are you O Israel, for all of you are very wise, from your old to your young!” (Eruvin 53b con’t)

The 50 Gates of Wisdom are a tool by which one comes to comprehend the self, defects therein, and the path toward refinement. In other words, wisdom is not a talent or gift. It is a practice.

When we count the Omer, we endeavor to leave the impurities of slavery in Egypt behind, and prepare ourselves for receiving Torah at Mt. Sinai. Each day brings a new meditation based on a combination of Sefirot, or the emanations of G-d through which He interacts with His creation. For a good primer, click here.

This year, I’m working on attention to detail. I’m a big picture guy, and sometimes I am careless - with work, with correspondence, with people. To paraphrase a Sicilian sage, a man cannot afford to be careless. But you can’t just say, “I will not be careless.” It won’t work. It’s like a New Year’s resolution. You say it, you mean it, then you wake up with a hangover, and life gets in the way.

To make a real change, I have to do the work. So I count the days, and take the steps away from Pharaoh Carelessness. Two days ago I counted 24 days, which is three weeks and three days. The week is dedicated to Netzach, or endurance. That day I inspected the Tiferet of Netzach, or the balance aspect of endurance. For me this means, how am I implementing attention to detail in my life so that it will endure, and how is balance part of that equation?

When I ask myself that type of question, I get very still and eventually a truth comes. In this case, I thought about scheduling. I have to make time for each of my activities. I can’t be in a reactive mode, rushing from one to the other, anxious about the latter while doing the former, or I’ll always be on my heels, thinking will be muddied and choices rushed. So it starts with a simple action: setting the alarm clock 30 minutes earlier. A practical outcome from an introspective process. G-d willing, this little step will help me become a better father, husband, director, man.

And I believe this process is a big part of why G-d gave us the Torah, and why our tribe has studied it for 3,000 years. As Moses said to all of us at Mt. Sinai:

I make this covenant, with its sanctions, not with you alone, but both with those who are standing here with us this day before the LORD our God and with those who are not with us here this day… Surely, this Instruction which I enjoin upon you this day is not too baffling for you, nor is it beyond reach. It is not the heavens, that you should say, “Who among us can go up to the heavens and get it for us and impart it to us, that we may observe it?” Neither is it beyond the sea, that you should say, “Who among us can cross to the other side of the sea and get it for us and impart it to us, that we may observe it?” (Deut. 30:13)

No, the thing is very near to you, in your mouth and in your heart, that you may do it.

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Exchange ideas with Salvador Litvak and other Talmudists at facebook.com/accidentaltalmudist (and please LIKE the page to help enlarge our community)

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Salvador Litvak wrote and directed the Passover comedy and cult hit “When Do We Eat?” His current film, “Saving Lincoln”, explores Abraham Lincoln’s conflicted tenure as commander-in-chief through the eyes of his dear friend and bodyguard, Ward Hill Lamon.

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